Thus does the royal prophet speak of sinners: They tempted and provoked the most high God. (Psalm 77:56) God is incapable of grief; but were it possible for him to grieve, every sin that men commit would deeply afflict him and deprive him of happiness.
Sin, O God! is the return I have made Thee for Thy love! How often have I renounced Thy friendship for the sake of some wretched self-gratification O infinite goodness! because Thou art such, pardon me my offences.
St. Bernard, moreover, adds that the malice of sin is so great that it would annihilate God, were this possible." If God could die, mortal sin would deprive him of life. And how? Father Medina answers, "Because it would give him infinite sorrow." How afflicting is it to be injured by those whom we have especially befriended and loved! What then must it be for God to behold man, whom he has favored with so many and so great benefits and loved with so great love, even to shedding his blood and laying down his life, — what must it be to behold man turn his back upon him and despise his grace for a mere nothing, for a fit of passion, or a momentary pleasure! Were he capable of grief and sadness, he would die of the bitterness which such conduct would occasion him. Then he saith to them: My soul is sorrowful even unto death. Stay you here and watch with me. (Matthew 26:38)
Dearest Jesus, I am the lost sheep; Thou art the good shepherd who hast laid down Thy life for Thy sheep; have pity on me, pardon me for all the displeasure which my sins have occasioned Thee. I am grieved, O Jesus! for having offended Thee, and love Thee with my whole soul.
It was because our loving Redeemer had our sins constantly before his eyes that his life was so painful and full of bitterness. This was the cause of his sweating blood and suffering the agonies of death in the garden of Gethsemane, where he declared that "his soul was sorrowful even unto death." What made him sweat blood and cast him into so dreadful an agony but the sight of the sins of men?
Give me then, O Jesus ! a share of the sorrow which then oppressed Thee for my sins; grant that it may afflict me during my whole life, and, if Thou pleasest, even unto death. O Jesus! I desire nevermore to displease Thee, I will nevermore afflict Thee, but will love Thee with all my strength, who art my love, my life, and my only good. Suffer me not to offend Thee any more. Mary, my hope, have compassion on me.
Friday
Sunday
The Vanity of the World
Only the grave, saith holy Job, remaineth for me. (Job 17:1) Days and years pass away, pleasures, honors, and riches pass away, and what will be the end ? Death will come and strip us of all, and we shall be buried in the grave to corrupt and moulder into dust, deserted and forgotten by all. Alas! how, in the end of our lives, will the remembrance of all we have acquired in this world serve for nothing but to increase our anguish and our uncertainty of salvation!
O death, O death, never depart from before my eyes. O God, do Thou enlighten me.
My life is cut off as by a weaver. (Isaiah 38:12) How many, in the midst of executing their long-contemplated designs, are overtaken by death and deprived of all things! Ah, with what pain and remorse will the goods of this world be regarded, on the bed of death, by those who have been unduly attached to them! To worldlings who are spiritually blind the goods of this present life appear great; but death will discover what they really are: dust—smoke, and vainity. Before the light of this last lamp all the dazzling grandeur of this world will vanish and disappear. The greatest fortunes, the highest honors, when considered on the bed of death, will lose all their value and splendor. The shade of death will obscure even crowns and sceptres.
Grant me, O God! Thy holy grace, for this alone is all I desire. I am grieved for having ever despised such a treasure. Jesus, have pity on me.
Of what avail then will riches be at the hour of death, when nothing will remain for us but a wooden coffin and a winding-sheet? Of what avail will be the honors which we have acquired, when no others will remain for us but a funeral procession and a tomb, which will not be able to afford us the least satisfaction, if our souls should be lost? And of what avail will the beauty of the body be, when the body itself will become a mass of worms, infect the air with its stench, and excite horror in all who behold it ?
My dear Redeemer, although I knew that by sinning I should forfeit Thy friendship, yet did I sin; but I hope for pardon from Thee who hast died to purchase pardon for me. Oh that I had never offended Thee, my good God! I behold the love which Thou hast. shown me; and this increases my grief for having displeased Thee who art so good a Father. I love Thee, O Lord! and will never live without loving Thee; give me perseverance. Mary, my mother, pray to Jesus for me.
O death, O death, never depart from before my eyes. O God, do Thou enlighten me.
My life is cut off as by a weaver. (Isaiah 38:12) How many, in the midst of executing their long-contemplated designs, are overtaken by death and deprived of all things! Ah, with what pain and remorse will the goods of this world be regarded, on the bed of death, by those who have been unduly attached to them! To worldlings who are spiritually blind the goods of this present life appear great; but death will discover what they really are: dust—smoke, and vainity. Before the light of this last lamp all the dazzling grandeur of this world will vanish and disappear. The greatest fortunes, the highest honors, when considered on the bed of death, will lose all their value and splendor. The shade of death will obscure even crowns and sceptres.
Grant me, O God! Thy holy grace, for this alone is all I desire. I am grieved for having ever despised such a treasure. Jesus, have pity on me.
Of what avail then will riches be at the hour of death, when nothing will remain for us but a wooden coffin and a winding-sheet? Of what avail will be the honors which we have acquired, when no others will remain for us but a funeral procession and a tomb, which will not be able to afford us the least satisfaction, if our souls should be lost? And of what avail will the beauty of the body be, when the body itself will become a mass of worms, infect the air with its stench, and excite horror in all who behold it ?
My dear Redeemer, although I knew that by sinning I should forfeit Thy friendship, yet did I sin; but I hope for pardon from Thee who hast died to purchase pardon for me. Oh that I had never offended Thee, my good God! I behold the love which Thou hast. shown me; and this increases my grief for having displeased Thee who art so good a Father. I love Thee, O Lord! and will never live without loving Thee; give me perseverance. Mary, my mother, pray to Jesus for me.
Friday
The Certainty of Being Either Saved or Lost
With fear and trembling, saith the Apostle, work out your salvation. (Philippians 2:12) In order to be saved we should tremble lest we be lost, for there is no medium; we must be either saved or lost forever. He who trembles not is in great danger of being lost, because he takes but little care to employ the means of obtaining salvation. God desires that all should be saved, and he gives to all his grace; but he requires that all should co-operate for this end. All desire to be saved; many, because they will not employ the means of salvation, are lost. St. Philip Neri used to say, " Heaven is not made for the slothful."
Enlighten me, O Lord, that I may know what I ought to do, and what to avoid, for I desire to do all that Thou requirest of me. I am determined, by Thy grace, to save my soul.
St. Teresa said to her religious, "One soul! my daughters, one eternity!" She meant that in this world we ought not to attend to anything but to the salvation of our souls; because if the soul be lost, all will be lost; and if once lost, will be lost forever. Benedict XII, being asked by a prince for a favor that he could not grant without committing sin, answered the ambassador: "Tell your prince that if I had two souls I would give him one, but as I have only one, I cannot consent to lose it for his sake." Thus should we answer the devil or the world when they offer us forbidden fruit.
O God! how often have I lost my soul by forfeiting Thy grace! But since Thou offerest me Thy pardon, I detest all the offences I have committed against Thee, and love Thee above all things.
Would that we were fully impressed with the meaning of that great maxim of St. Francis Xavier, "There is but one evil, and there is but one good in the world!" The only evil is damnation; the only good, salvation. No; poverty, infirmity, ignominies are not evils; these when embraced with resignation will increase our glory in heaven. On the other hand, health, riches, and honors are not goods for too many Christians, because they become to them greater occasion of losing their souls.
Save me then, O God! and do with me what Thou pleasest. Thou knowest and willest what is best for me. I abandon myself to Thy mercy: Into Thy hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit. (Psalms 30:6) I am so sorry for having been hitherto opposed to Thy will, as to die to expiate my offences; but now I love Thee, and will nothing but what Thou willest. Grant me Thy love, that I may be faithful to Thee. And, Mary, give me thy powerful assistance.
Enlighten me, O Lord, that I may know what I ought to do, and what to avoid, for I desire to do all that Thou requirest of me. I am determined, by Thy grace, to save my soul.
St. Teresa said to her religious, "One soul! my daughters, one eternity!" She meant that in this world we ought not to attend to anything but to the salvation of our souls; because if the soul be lost, all will be lost; and if once lost, will be lost forever. Benedict XII, being asked by a prince for a favor that he could not grant without committing sin, answered the ambassador: "Tell your prince that if I had two souls I would give him one, but as I have only one, I cannot consent to lose it for his sake." Thus should we answer the devil or the world when they offer us forbidden fruit.
O God! how often have I lost my soul by forfeiting Thy grace! But since Thou offerest me Thy pardon, I detest all the offences I have committed against Thee, and love Thee above all things.
Would that we were fully impressed with the meaning of that great maxim of St. Francis Xavier, "There is but one evil, and there is but one good in the world!" The only evil is damnation; the only good, salvation. No; poverty, infirmity, ignominies are not evils; these when embraced with resignation will increase our glory in heaven. On the other hand, health, riches, and honors are not goods for too many Christians, because they become to them greater occasion of losing their souls.
Save me then, O God! and do with me what Thou pleasest. Thou knowest and willest what is best for me. I abandon myself to Thy mercy: Into Thy hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit. (Psalms 30:6) I am so sorry for having been hitherto opposed to Thy will, as to die to expiate my offences; but now I love Thee, and will nothing but what Thou willest. Grant me Thy love, that I may be faithful to Thee. And, Mary, give me thy powerful assistance.
Monday
The Death of Jesus for the Love of Men
Was it ever possible that God, the Creator of all things, should have been pleased to die for the love of his creatures? It is of faith that he has done so. He hath loved us, and hath delivered Himself for us. (Ephesians 5:2) The earth, the heavens, and all nature, with astonishment beheld Jesus, the only begotten Son of God, the lord of the universe, die of intense pain and anguish, on a disgraceful cross; and why ? For the love of men. And do men believe this and not love God?
I have believed it, O Jesus! and yet not only have I not loved Thee, but I have frequently offended Thee. Pardon me, I beseech Thee, and remind me continually of the death which Thou hast suffered for me, that I may nevermore offend Thee, but may always love Thee.
It was not necessary for man's salvation that God should die; one drop of his blood, a single tear, or a prayer would have been sufficient, because being of infinite value, it would have redeemed this or a thousand other worlds.
But, O Jesus! Thou wouldst suffer so much, to teach us Thy great love for us. Hence, St. Bonaventure exclaims, but with much greater reason may I exclaim, who have so often offended my Redeemer: "Alas! my God, why hast Thou so much loved me? why, O Lord, why? Who am I ?" O divine Pastor of my soul, behold I am the lost sheep, in quest of which Thou didst come upon the earth. I have ungratefully fled away from Thee; since, unmindful of the sufferings which I have occasioned Thee, Thou callest me, miserable as I am, but overcome with Thy great goodness, embracing Thy sacred feet, nailed to the cross. Jesus, my love, my treasure! I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee.
St. Bernard, imagining himself present when Pilate passed sentence of death on our Blessed Saviour, thus addresses him: "What hast Thou done, my most innocent Saviour, that Thou shouldst be thus condemned?" Thou art innocence itself; and how do I now behold Thee condemned to death, even to the death of the cross? What crime hast Thou committed?" And he proceeds to answer, "Thy crime is love." As if he had said, Ah! it is Thy too great love for us, and not Pilate, that condemns Thee to death.
When, my dear Redeemer, I remember the offences I have committed against Thee, it is not hell, which I have deserved for them, that makes me grieve, but the love which Thou hast shown me. Ah ! my crucified God, I desire to be henceforth and forever Thine, and I will love no other but Thee. Strengthen my weakness, and make me faithful to Thee. Holy Mary, mother of God, enable me to love Jesus; this is the only favor I ask.
I have believed it, O Jesus! and yet not only have I not loved Thee, but I have frequently offended Thee. Pardon me, I beseech Thee, and remind me continually of the death which Thou hast suffered for me, that I may nevermore offend Thee, but may always love Thee.
It was not necessary for man's salvation that God should die; one drop of his blood, a single tear, or a prayer would have been sufficient, because being of infinite value, it would have redeemed this or a thousand other worlds.
But, O Jesus! Thou wouldst suffer so much, to teach us Thy great love for us. Hence, St. Bonaventure exclaims, but with much greater reason may I exclaim, who have so often offended my Redeemer: "Alas! my God, why hast Thou so much loved me? why, O Lord, why? Who am I ?" O divine Pastor of my soul, behold I am the lost sheep, in quest of which Thou didst come upon the earth. I have ungratefully fled away from Thee; since, unmindful of the sufferings which I have occasioned Thee, Thou callest me, miserable as I am, but overcome with Thy great goodness, embracing Thy sacred feet, nailed to the cross. Jesus, my love, my treasure! I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee.
St. Bernard, imagining himself present when Pilate passed sentence of death on our Blessed Saviour, thus addresses him: "What hast Thou done, my most innocent Saviour, that Thou shouldst be thus condemned?" Thou art innocence itself; and how do I now behold Thee condemned to death, even to the death of the cross? What crime hast Thou committed?" And he proceeds to answer, "Thy crime is love." As if he had said, Ah! it is Thy too great love for us, and not Pilate, that condemns Thee to death.
When, my dear Redeemer, I remember the offences I have committed against Thee, it is not hell, which I have deserved for them, that makes me grieve, but the love which Thou hast shown me. Ah ! my crucified God, I desire to be henceforth and forever Thine, and I will love no other but Thee. Strengthen my weakness, and make me faithful to Thee. Holy Mary, mother of God, enable me to love Jesus; this is the only favor I ask.
Friday
The Uncertainty of Grace
Delay not to be converted to the Lord, and put it not off from day to day: for His wrath shall come on a sudden, and in the time of vengeance will He destroy thee. (Revelation 9:6) The Lord admonishes us to be speedily converted, if we would be saved; because if we go on putting off our conversion from day to day, the time of vengeance will come, when God will neither call nor wait for us any longer; death will overtake us in sin, and there will be no means of escaping eternal damnation. God admonishes us in this manner, because he loves us and wills not to see us perish.
I am convinced, O God! that Thou desirest my salvation; I know that Thou desirest to deal with me in Thy mercy; and it is my desire nevermore to despise Thee.
Alas! to how many are the admonitions given by God during life, become now in hell the most cruel swords that pierce their souls! In proportion as the mercies which God showed them were greater, so were their crimes more enormous.
If, O Jesus! Thou hadst condemned me to hell, as I have deserved, how great would have been my punishment, since Thy graces and favors have been so abundant towards me! No, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. Say to me what Thou pleasest, and I will obey Thee in all things. I am sorry for having so often offended Thee; henceforward I will not seek to please myself, but to please only Thee, my God and only good.
How cautious are men in their temporal affairs, and yet how negligent in the affairs of eternity! If a man has to receive a sum of money from another, he uses every expedient to obtain it as quickly as possible, saying, "Who knows what may happen?" And yet, why do so many live months and years in sin? Because they do not say, when the soul is at stake, "Who knows what may happen ?" If money be lost, however valuable it may be, all is not lost; but if the soul be lost, all is lost, and must be lost forever, without hope of recovery.
My beloved Redeemer, Thou hast given me life that I may become worthy of Thy grace; and yet I have often renounced Thy grace for something worse than nothing. Pardon me, O infinite goodness! for I am sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for having done so. O Jesus ! Thou hast done too much to oblige me to love Thee, and I desire to love Thee to the utmost of my power. I love Thee, my sovereign good, I love Thee more than myself. Permit me not, O God ! to cease to love Thee any more. O Mary, holy queen! protect me.
I am convinced, O God! that Thou desirest my salvation; I know that Thou desirest to deal with me in Thy mercy; and it is my desire nevermore to despise Thee.
Alas! to how many are the admonitions given by God during life, become now in hell the most cruel swords that pierce their souls! In proportion as the mercies which God showed them were greater, so were their crimes more enormous.
If, O Jesus! Thou hadst condemned me to hell, as I have deserved, how great would have been my punishment, since Thy graces and favors have been so abundant towards me! No, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. Say to me what Thou pleasest, and I will obey Thee in all things. I am sorry for having so often offended Thee; henceforward I will not seek to please myself, but to please only Thee, my God and only good.
How cautious are men in their temporal affairs, and yet how negligent in the affairs of eternity! If a man has to receive a sum of money from another, he uses every expedient to obtain it as quickly as possible, saying, "Who knows what may happen?" And yet, why do so many live months and years in sin? Because they do not say, when the soul is at stake, "Who knows what may happen ?" If money be lost, however valuable it may be, all is not lost; but if the soul be lost, all is lost, and must be lost forever, without hope of recovery.
My beloved Redeemer, Thou hast given me life that I may become worthy of Thy grace; and yet I have often renounced Thy grace for something worse than nothing. Pardon me, O infinite goodness! for I am sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for having done so. O Jesus ! Thou hast done too much to oblige me to love Thee, and I desire to love Thee to the utmost of my power. I love Thee, my sovereign good, I love Thee more than myself. Permit me not, O God ! to cease to love Thee any more. O Mary, holy queen! protect me.
Wednesday
The Eternity of Hell
If hell were not eternal, it would not be hell. Punishment that does not continue for a long time is not grievous punishment. On the other hand, punishment, however light it may be, when it continues for a long time, becomes intolerable. Were a person obliged during the whole of his life to see the same entertainments, or to hear the same music, how could he endure it? What then must it be to remain in hell and to suffer all its torments! And for how long a time? For all eternity. It would be folly, for the sake of a day's pleasure, to condemn one's self to be burnt alive. And is it not folly, for the sake of a sensual gratification, which can last but for one moment, to condemn one's self to the fire of hell, whose victims, though dying every moment, yet never, never die?
O God! preserve me by Thy grace. Woe to me if I should turn my back upon Thee after the great mercy with which Thou hast dealt with me! Keep me, O God! and preserve me from so great a misfortune.
Let us awaken our slumbering faith. It is certain that he who is lost is lost forever, without the least hope of being redeemed from eternal ruin. They shall go into eternal punishment. (Matthew 25:46) He who once enters the prison of hell can come out no more. Otherwise the condemned wretches would flatter themselves with hopes, and would say, Who knows, perhaps God may some day have pity on us and deliver us? But no, they well know that hell will never have an end, and that they must continue to suffer the same torments that they at present endure so long as God shall be God. My dear Redeemer, I know too well that by the past I have forfeited Thy grace, and condemned myself to hell; but I do not know whether Thou hast pardoned me. Hasten to forgive me, O Jesus! while I bitterly lament my offences against Thee, and never suffer me to offend Thee any more.
In this life death is of all things the most dreaded, but in hell it is of all things the most desired. There they desire and long for death, but cannot die. They shall desire to die, and death shall fly from them. (Revelations 9:6) Are there not at least, in that place of torments, some to compassionate them? No, all hate them, and rejoice in their sufferings, which will last forever, without end of mitigation. The trumpet of divine justice continually sounds and thunders forth in their ears those terrible words: "Ever, ever; never, never."
Amongst these miserable beings, O Jesus! I have deserved to be numbered; but do Thou, who hast hitherto preserved me. from falling into hell, preserve me for the future from falling into sin, which alone can condemn me to that place of woe. Ah! never suffer me again to become Thy enemy. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and I am sorry for having offended Thee. Pardon me, and as I have deserved to burn forever in the fire of hell, grant me to burn forever with the fire of Thy holy love. O Mary, in thy powerful intercession do I confide.
O God! preserve me by Thy grace. Woe to me if I should turn my back upon Thee after the great mercy with which Thou hast dealt with me! Keep me, O God! and preserve me from so great a misfortune.
Let us awaken our slumbering faith. It is certain that he who is lost is lost forever, without the least hope of being redeemed from eternal ruin. They shall go into eternal punishment. (Matthew 25:46) He who once enters the prison of hell can come out no more. Otherwise the condemned wretches would flatter themselves with hopes, and would say, Who knows, perhaps God may some day have pity on us and deliver us? But no, they well know that hell will never have an end, and that they must continue to suffer the same torments that they at present endure so long as God shall be God. My dear Redeemer, I know too well that by the past I have forfeited Thy grace, and condemned myself to hell; but I do not know whether Thou hast pardoned me. Hasten to forgive me, O Jesus! while I bitterly lament my offences against Thee, and never suffer me to offend Thee any more.
In this life death is of all things the most dreaded, but in hell it is of all things the most desired. There they desire and long for death, but cannot die. They shall desire to die, and death shall fly from them. (Revelations 9:6) Are there not at least, in that place of torments, some to compassionate them? No, all hate them, and rejoice in their sufferings, which will last forever, without end of mitigation. The trumpet of divine justice continually sounds and thunders forth in their ears those terrible words: "Ever, ever; never, never."
Amongst these miserable beings, O Jesus! I have deserved to be numbered; but do Thou, who hast hitherto preserved me. from falling into hell, preserve me for the future from falling into sin, which alone can condemn me to that place of woe. Ah! never suffer me again to become Thy enemy. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and I am sorry for having offended Thee. Pardon me, and as I have deserved to burn forever in the fire of hell, grant me to burn forever with the fire of Thy holy love. O Mary, in thy powerful intercession do I confide.
Tuesday
An Unprovided Death
Nothing is more certain than death, but nothing more uncertain than the hour of death. It is certain that the year and day of each one's death are already determined by our Lord, though we know them not; and wisely does God conceal them from us, in order that we may always prepare for our departure.
I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me, and for not having called me out of life in the state of mortal sin. During the remainder of my life I will bewail my iniquities and love Thee with all my strength. I know that I must die, and by Thy grace I will prepare myself for a good death.
Jesus Christ admonishes us of the hour of our death, and when will it be? when we least expect it. At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40) If then, says St. Bernard, death may at any time take us out of life, we should at all times be prepared for Stand keep our accounts in order.
O Jesus! I will not wait until the moment of my death to give myself to Thee. Thou hast said that those who seek Thee shall find Thee: Seek and ye shall find.(Matthew 7:7) I seek Thee, I desire Thee; grant that I may find Thee. I am sorry for my sins and will nevermore offend Thee.
When then, dear Christian, you are tempted to commit sin with the hope of confessing it on the morrow, say to yourself: But who knows but that this moment may be my last? And if in this moment I should be guilty of sin, and death should overtake me, whither should I go? O God! how many miserable sinners have been struck by death in the act of feasting themselves on some poisonous gratification! The devil will say to you: This misfortune will not befall you. But do you answer him: If it should befall me, what will become of me for eternity?
O God! may not that happen to me which has happened to so many other unhappy sinners? How many are now in hell tor lesser sins than I have committed! I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me with so much patience, and for having now enlightened me. I have erred in forsaking Thee; and death might have been my punishment; but since Thou givest me time, henceforward I will think of nothing but of loving Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And do thou, Mary, assist me by thy holy intercession.
I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me, and for not having called me out of life in the state of mortal sin. During the remainder of my life I will bewail my iniquities and love Thee with all my strength. I know that I must die, and by Thy grace I will prepare myself for a good death.
Jesus Christ admonishes us of the hour of our death, and when will it be? when we least expect it. At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40) If then, says St. Bernard, death may at any time take us out of life, we should at all times be prepared for Stand keep our accounts in order.
O Jesus! I will not wait until the moment of my death to give myself to Thee. Thou hast said that those who seek Thee shall find Thee: Seek and ye shall find.(Matthew 7:7) I seek Thee, I desire Thee; grant that I may find Thee. I am sorry for my sins and will nevermore offend Thee.
When then, dear Christian, you are tempted to commit sin with the hope of confessing it on the morrow, say to yourself: But who knows but that this moment may be my last? And if in this moment I should be guilty of sin, and death should overtake me, whither should I go? O God! how many miserable sinners have been struck by death in the act of feasting themselves on some poisonous gratification! The devil will say to you: This misfortune will not befall you. But do you answer him: If it should befall me, what will become of me for eternity?
O God! may not that happen to me which has happened to so many other unhappy sinners? How many are now in hell tor lesser sins than I have committed! I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me with so much patience, and for having now enlightened me. I have erred in forsaking Thee; and death might have been my punishment; but since Thou givest me time, henceforward I will think of nothing but of loving Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And do thou, Mary, assist me by thy holy intercession.
Sunday
The Sentence of Particular Judgment
Oh! what joy will he experience who, departing out of this life in the grace of God, will, on being presented before Jesus Christ, behold him with a benignant countenance, be lovingly received by him, and hear from him those delightful words: Well done, thou good and faithful servant: because thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will place thee over many things : enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. (Matthew 25:23)
But, O Jesus! if I were now to be summoned to judgment before Thee, how could I hope that Thou wouldst call me a good and faithful servant, when I have hitherto been so bad and faithless towards Thee, changing my promises of fidelity into treasons? But I will be faithful to Thee for the future, and will sooner lose my life a thousand times than forfeit Thy grace. Do Thou give me strength to fulfil this my resolution.
On the other hand, what anguish, O Jesus! will that sinner experience, who, dying in sin, and being presented before Thee, beholds Thy wrathful countenance! The soul that departs this life in God's displeasure will first condemn itself, and will then hear from Jesus Christ that terrible sentence: Depart from me, thou accursed, into everlasting fire. (Matthew 25:41)
How often, O Jesus, have I deserved to hear from Thee the same sentence when I have committed mortal sin! When death overtakes me, Thou wilt then be my judge; but now Thou art my Father and Redeemer, ready to pardon me, if I am sorry for having offended Thee. I am therefore sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for all my offences against Thee; and I am sorry, not so much on account of hell which I have deserved by them, as because by them I have grievously offended Thee, who hast loved me with an infinite love.
The soul goes forth and leaves the body, but it is for some time doubtful whether the person be alive or dead. While the bystanders are doubting, the soul has already entered eternity. The priest, satisfied at length that the man is dead, recites the prayer of the Church: "Come to his assistance, all ye saints of God: meet him, all ye angels of God: receive his soul and present it now before its Lord.'" But of what avail will it be to the soul that has departed an enemy of God, and upon which sentence has already been passed, to call the saints and angels to its assistance?"
O my good angel, ye saints, my holy advocates, St. Michael, St. Joseph, and you my holy protectress Mary! help me now whilst you have it in your power. And Thou, my Redeemer, pardon me now whilst Thou dost exercise mercy. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart. Assist me, O Lord! and support me, that I may never offend Thee more. O Mary! take me forever to thy care.
But, O Jesus! if I were now to be summoned to judgment before Thee, how could I hope that Thou wouldst call me a good and faithful servant, when I have hitherto been so bad and faithless towards Thee, changing my promises of fidelity into treasons? But I will be faithful to Thee for the future, and will sooner lose my life a thousand times than forfeit Thy grace. Do Thou give me strength to fulfil this my resolution.
On the other hand, what anguish, O Jesus! will that sinner experience, who, dying in sin, and being presented before Thee, beholds Thy wrathful countenance! The soul that departs this life in God's displeasure will first condemn itself, and will then hear from Jesus Christ that terrible sentence: Depart from me, thou accursed, into everlasting fire. (Matthew 25:41)
How often, O Jesus, have I deserved to hear from Thee the same sentence when I have committed mortal sin! When death overtakes me, Thou wilt then be my judge; but now Thou art my Father and Redeemer, ready to pardon me, if I am sorry for having offended Thee. I am therefore sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for all my offences against Thee; and I am sorry, not so much on account of hell which I have deserved by them, as because by them I have grievously offended Thee, who hast loved me with an infinite love.
The soul goes forth and leaves the body, but it is for some time doubtful whether the person be alive or dead. While the bystanders are doubting, the soul has already entered eternity. The priest, satisfied at length that the man is dead, recites the prayer of the Church: "Come to his assistance, all ye saints of God: meet him, all ye angels of God: receive his soul and present it now before its Lord.'" But of what avail will it be to the soul that has departed an enemy of God, and upon which sentence has already been passed, to call the saints and angels to its assistance?"
O my good angel, ye saints, my holy advocates, St. Michael, St. Joseph, and you my holy protectress Mary! help me now whilst you have it in your power. And Thou, my Redeemer, pardon me now whilst Thou dost exercise mercy. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart. Assist me, O Lord! and support me, that I may never offend Thee more. O Mary! take me forever to thy care.
Wednesday
The Desire of God to Save Sinners
It is indeed very surprising that man, a worm of the earth, should dare to offend his Creator and turn his back upon him, by despising his graces after God has so favored and loved him as to lay down his life to save him. But it is still more surprising that God, after having been thus despised by man, should seek after him, invite him to repentance and offer him his pardon, as though God stood in need of us and not we of him.
O Jesus! Thou seekest me, and I seek after Thee. Thou desirest me, and I desire only Thee.
For Christ, saith the Apostle, we beseech you, be recon died to God. (2 Corinthians 5:20) "And does God," exclaims St. Chrysostom, "call thus upon sinners? And what does he ask of them? to be reconciled, and be in peace with him."
My Redeemer, Jesus Christ, how couldst Thou have had so much love for me, who have so often offended Thee? I detest all my offences against Thee; give me Still greater grief, still greater love, that I may deplore my sins, not so much on account of the punishments I have deserved by them, as for the injury I have offered to Thee, my God, who art infinitely good and amiable.
What is man, exclaims holy Job, that thou shouldst magnify him for why dost thou set the heart upon him? (Job 7:17)
What good, O Lord! hast Thou ever derived from me? and what canst Thou expect from me, that Thou lovest me so much, and comest so near to me? Hast Thou then forgotten all the injuries and treasons which I have committed against Thee? But since Thou hast so much loved me, I, a miserable worm, must also love Thee, my Creator and my Redeemer. Yes, I do love Thee, my God ; I love Thee with my whole heart, I love Thee more than myself, and because I love Thee I will do everything to please Thee. — Thou knowest that nothing is so grievous to me as the remembrance of my having so often despised Thy love. I hope for the future to be able to compensate by my love for the frequent displeasure which I have given Thee. Help me for the sake of that precious blood which Thou hast shed for me. Help me also, O holy Mary ! for the love of thy Son who died for me.
O Jesus! Thou seekest me, and I seek after Thee. Thou desirest me, and I desire only Thee.
For Christ, saith the Apostle, we beseech you, be recon died to God. (2 Corinthians 5:20) "And does God," exclaims St. Chrysostom, "call thus upon sinners? And what does he ask of them? to be reconciled, and be in peace with him."
My Redeemer, Jesus Christ, how couldst Thou have had so much love for me, who have so often offended Thee? I detest all my offences against Thee; give me Still greater grief, still greater love, that I may deplore my sins, not so much on account of the punishments I have deserved by them, as for the injury I have offered to Thee, my God, who art infinitely good and amiable.
What is man, exclaims holy Job, that thou shouldst magnify him for why dost thou set the heart upon him? (Job 7:17)
What good, O Lord! hast Thou ever derived from me? and what canst Thou expect from me, that Thou lovest me so much, and comest so near to me? Hast Thou then forgotten all the injuries and treasons which I have committed against Thee? But since Thou hast so much loved me, I, a miserable worm, must also love Thee, my Creator and my Redeemer. Yes, I do love Thee, my God ; I love Thee with my whole heart, I love Thee more than myself, and because I love Thee I will do everything to please Thee. — Thou knowest that nothing is so grievous to me as the remembrance of my having so often despised Thy love. I hope for the future to be able to compensate by my love for the frequent displeasure which I have given Thee. Help me for the sake of that precious blood which Thou hast shed for me. Help me also, O holy Mary ! for the love of thy Son who died for me.
Tuesday
The Moment of Death
"O moment, on which depends eternity!" — Oh! how much depends on the last moment of our lives, on our last breath! Either an eternity of delights, or an eternity of torments, a life of happiness, or a life of misery. What folly therefore must it be, for the sake of a wretched momentary pleasure in this life, to run the risk of making an evil end, and beginning a life of misery which will never terminate!
O God! what will become of me in the last moment of my life? O Jesus, who didst die for my salvation! suffer me not to be lost forever; suffer me not to lose Thee, my only good.
O God! how do those miserable criminals who are condemned to cast lots for their lives tremble when they throw the dice, upon the cast of which depends their life or death! Tell me, Christian, if you were in such a situation, how much you would give to be liberated from it? But faith teaches you that you will one day arrive at that last moment, on which will depend your eternal life or death. You will then say, "Alas! I must now be either happy forever with God, or in despair forever without him."
No, my God, I will not lose Thee; if I have hitherto forfeited Thy friendship, I am sorry for it, and sincerely repent of it; I will never lose Thee more.
Either we believe, or we do not believe. — And if we believe that there is an eternity, that we can die only once, and that if we die ill, the consequences will be eternal, without the least hope of remedy; why do we not resolve to separate ourselves from all danger of being lost, and to use all the means in our power to secure for ourselves a happy death? No security can be too great when eternity is at slake. The days of our lives are so many favors from God, by which he allows us time to prepare our accounts against the arrival of death. Delay not, for you have no lime to lose.
Behold me, O God! tell me what I must do to be saved, for I will do all that Thou requirest of me. I have turned my back upon Thee; and for this I am exceedingly sorry, and for having done so would willingly die of grief. Pardon me, O Lord! and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more. I love Thee above all things, and will never more cease to love Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, obtain for me the grace of perseverance in virtue.
O God! what will become of me in the last moment of my life? O Jesus, who didst die for my salvation! suffer me not to be lost forever; suffer me not to lose Thee, my only good.
O God! how do those miserable criminals who are condemned to cast lots for their lives tremble when they throw the dice, upon the cast of which depends their life or death! Tell me, Christian, if you were in such a situation, how much you would give to be liberated from it? But faith teaches you that you will one day arrive at that last moment, on which will depend your eternal life or death. You will then say, "Alas! I must now be either happy forever with God, or in despair forever without him."
No, my God, I will not lose Thee; if I have hitherto forfeited Thy friendship, I am sorry for it, and sincerely repent of it; I will never lose Thee more.
Either we believe, or we do not believe. — And if we believe that there is an eternity, that we can die only once, and that if we die ill, the consequences will be eternal, without the least hope of remedy; why do we not resolve to separate ourselves from all danger of being lost, and to use all the means in our power to secure for ourselves a happy death? No security can be too great when eternity is at slake. The days of our lives are so many favors from God, by which he allows us time to prepare our accounts against the arrival of death. Delay not, for you have no lime to lose.
Behold me, O God! tell me what I must do to be saved, for I will do all that Thou requirest of me. I have turned my back upon Thee; and for this I am exceedingly sorry, and for having done so would willingly die of grief. Pardon me, O Lord! and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more. I love Thee above all things, and will never more cease to love Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, obtain for me the grace of perseverance in virtue.
Monday
The Folly of Neglecting Salvation
What doth it profit a man, saith our Lord, if he gain the world, and suffer the loss of his own soul? How many rich men, how many nobles, how many monarchs, are now in hell! What now remains to them of their riches and honors but remorse and rage, which prev upon their souls, and will continue to prey upon them for all eternity?
O my God ! enlighten me and assist me. I hope nevermore to he deprived of Thy grace. Have pity on a sinner who desires to love Thee.
How comes it, writes Salvian, that men believe in death, judgment, hell, and eternity, and yet live without fearing them? Hell is believed, and yet how many go down thither! But, 0 God ! while these truths are believed, they are not dwelt upon, and hence are so many souls lost.
Alas! I also have been of the number of those who have been guilty of such folly. Although I knew that by offending Thee I was forfeiting Thy friendship, and writing my own condemnation; yet I was not restrained from committing sin! "Cast me not away from Thy face." I am sensible of the evil I have done in despising Thee, my God, and am grieved for it with my whole soul. Oh, "cast me not away from Thy face."
And then? and then? Oh, what force had these two words with F. P. Francis Zazzera when repeated to him by St. Philip Neri, in order to induce him to renounce the world and give himself wholly to God!* Oh that they would be wise, and would understand, and would provide for their latter end. (Deuteronomy 32:29) Oh! if all persons would but think of death, in which everything must be relinquished; of judgment, in which an account must be given of our whole lives ; of a happy or miserable eternity, which must be the lot of each one : if all did but provide for these last things of their lives, no one would be lost. The present only is thought of, and hence is eternal salvation lost.
I give Thee thanks, O God, for the patience with which Thou hast hitherto borne with me, and for the light which Thou now bestowest upon me. I see that although I forgot Thee, Thou didst not forget me. I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having turned my back upon Thee, and I am now resolved to give myself entirely to Thee. And why should I delay ? That Thou mayest abandon me, and that death may find me as miserable and ungrateful as I have been even until now? No, my God, I will no more offend Thee, but will love Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! Give me perseverance and Thy holy love; I ask for nothing more. Mary, refuge of sinners, intercede for me.
* The circumstance to which St. Alphonsus here refers is thus related by him in his sermon for Septuagesima Sunday: "St. Philip Neri, speaking, one day, to a young man named Francis Zazzera, who expected to make his fortune in the world by his talents, said : 'Be of good heart, my son; you may make a great fortune, you may become an eminent lawyer, you may then be made a prelate, then perhaps a cardinal, and then, who knows, perhaps even Pope. And then? and then?' Go,' continued the Saint, 'and reflect upon these two words.' The young man went his way, and after having meditated on the two words and then? and then? abandoned all his worldly prospects, and gave himself entirely to God. Leaving the world, he entered into the same congregation that St. Philip had founded, and then he died in the odor of sanctity."
O my God ! enlighten me and assist me. I hope nevermore to he deprived of Thy grace. Have pity on a sinner who desires to love Thee.
How comes it, writes Salvian, that men believe in death, judgment, hell, and eternity, and yet live without fearing them? Hell is believed, and yet how many go down thither! But, 0 God ! while these truths are believed, they are not dwelt upon, and hence are so many souls lost.
Alas! I also have been of the number of those who have been guilty of such folly. Although I knew that by offending Thee I was forfeiting Thy friendship, and writing my own condemnation; yet I was not restrained from committing sin! "Cast me not away from Thy face." I am sensible of the evil I have done in despising Thee, my God, and am grieved for it with my whole soul. Oh, "cast me not away from Thy face."
And then? and then? Oh, what force had these two words with F. P. Francis Zazzera when repeated to him by St. Philip Neri, in order to induce him to renounce the world and give himself wholly to God!* Oh that they would be wise, and would understand, and would provide for their latter end. (Deuteronomy 32:29) Oh! if all persons would but think of death, in which everything must be relinquished; of judgment, in which an account must be given of our whole lives ; of a happy or miserable eternity, which must be the lot of each one : if all did but provide for these last things of their lives, no one would be lost. The present only is thought of, and hence is eternal salvation lost.
I give Thee thanks, O God, for the patience with which Thou hast hitherto borne with me, and for the light which Thou now bestowest upon me. I see that although I forgot Thee, Thou didst not forget me. I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having turned my back upon Thee, and I am now resolved to give myself entirely to Thee. And why should I delay ? That Thou mayest abandon me, and that death may find me as miserable and ungrateful as I have been even until now? No, my God, I will no more offend Thee, but will love Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! Give me perseverance and Thy holy love; I ask for nothing more. Mary, refuge of sinners, intercede for me.
* The circumstance to which St. Alphonsus here refers is thus related by him in his sermon for Septuagesima Sunday: "St. Philip Neri, speaking, one day, to a young man named Francis Zazzera, who expected to make his fortune in the world by his talents, said : 'Be of good heart, my son; you may make a great fortune, you may become an eminent lawyer, you may then be made a prelate, then perhaps a cardinal, and then, who knows, perhaps even Pope. And then? and then?' Go,' continued the Saint, 'and reflect upon these two words.' The young man went his way, and after having meditated on the two words and then? and then? abandoned all his worldly prospects, and gave himself entirely to God. Leaving the world, he entered into the same congregation that St. Philip had founded, and then he died in the odor of sanctity."
Sunday
Jesus, the Man of Sorrows
The prophet Isaias calls our Blessed Redeemer a man of sorrows; (Isaiah 53:3) and such he was, for his whole life was a life of sorrows. He took upon his own shoulders all our debts. It is true that as he was man and God, a single prayer from him would have been sufficient to make satisfaction for the sins of the whole world; but our Saviour would rigorously satisfy divine justice, and hence he chose for himself a life of contempt and suffering, being content for the love of man to be treated as the last and the vilest of men, as the prophet Isaias had foreseen him: We have seen Him... despised and the most abject of men (Isaiah 53:2)
O my despised Jesus! by the contempt which Thou didst endure Thou hast made satisfaction for the contempt with which I have treated Thee. Oh that I had died and had never offended Thee!
Who, my God, amongst the sons of men, was ever so afflicted and oppressed as our most loving Redeemer? Man, however much he may be afflicted in this world, enjoys from time to time relief and consolation. Thus does our compassionate God treat his ungrateful and rebellious creatures. But he would not thus treat his beloved Son; for the life of Jesus Christ in this world was not only a life of afflictions, but of continual afflictions from its commencement until death. Our Blessed Saviour was deprived of all consolation and of every kind of relief. In a word, he was born but to suffer and to be the man of sorrows.
O Jesus! how unhappy is he who does not love Thee, or who loves Thee but little, after Thou hast so loved us miserable worms who have offended Thee! Enable me from this day forward to love no other but Thee, who alone art worthy of being loved.
Again, men suffer afflictions, but it is only while they are suffering them, because they do not know those which are yet to come. But Jesus Christ, having, as God, a knowledge of all future things, suffered in every moment of his life, not only the pains which actually afflicted him, but all those also which were to come upon him, and especially the outrages of his most sorrowful Passion, having always before his eyes his scourging at the pillar, his crowning with thorns, his crucifixion and bitter death, with all the sorrows and desolation which accompanied it.
And why, O Jesus! didst Thou suffer so much for me who have so grievously offended Thee? Accept of me now that I may love Thee, and that henceforward I may love no other but Thee. My love and my only good, accept of me and strengthen me. I am resolved to become holy, that I may please Thee alone. Thou desirest me to be all Thine, and such do I desire to be. Holy Mary, thou art my hope.
O my despised Jesus! by the contempt which Thou didst endure Thou hast made satisfaction for the contempt with which I have treated Thee. Oh that I had died and had never offended Thee!
Who, my God, amongst the sons of men, was ever so afflicted and oppressed as our most loving Redeemer? Man, however much he may be afflicted in this world, enjoys from time to time relief and consolation. Thus does our compassionate God treat his ungrateful and rebellious creatures. But he would not thus treat his beloved Son; for the life of Jesus Christ in this world was not only a life of afflictions, but of continual afflictions from its commencement until death. Our Blessed Saviour was deprived of all consolation and of every kind of relief. In a word, he was born but to suffer and to be the man of sorrows.
O Jesus! how unhappy is he who does not love Thee, or who loves Thee but little, after Thou hast so loved us miserable worms who have offended Thee! Enable me from this day forward to love no other but Thee, who alone art worthy of being loved.
Again, men suffer afflictions, but it is only while they are suffering them, because they do not know those which are yet to come. But Jesus Christ, having, as God, a knowledge of all future things, suffered in every moment of his life, not only the pains which actually afflicted him, but all those also which were to come upon him, and especially the outrages of his most sorrowful Passion, having always before his eyes his scourging at the pillar, his crowning with thorns, his crucifixion and bitter death, with all the sorrows and desolation which accompanied it.
And why, O Jesus! didst Thou suffer so much for me who have so grievously offended Thee? Accept of me now that I may love Thee, and that henceforward I may love no other but Thee. My love and my only good, accept of me and strengthen me. I am resolved to become holy, that I may please Thee alone. Thou desirest me to be all Thine, and such do I desire to be. Holy Mary, thou art my hope.
Friday
The Journey to Eternity
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. (Ecclesiastes 8:5) This earth is not our true country; we are only passing through it on our way to eternity. The land in which I dwell, the house which I inhabit, are no; mine. In a short time, and when I least expect it, I must leave them. The house which will contain my body until the day of general judgment will be the grave, and the house of my soul will be eternity, in heaven if I be saved, in hell if I be lost. Foolish indeed, then, should I be were I to place my affections on things which I must soon leave. I will endeavor to procure for myself a happy mansion in which I may dwell forever.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. It is said "he shall go," to give us to understand that each one shall go, in another life, into that house which he himself has chosen: " he shall go," he shall not be conducted, but shall go thither of his own free will. — Faith teaches us that, in the next life, there are two habitations: one is a palace of delights, where all are happy forever, and this is paradise; the other is a prison of excruciating torments, where all are forever miserable, and this is hell. Choose, my soul, to which of the two thou wilt go. If thou desirest heaven, thou must walk in the way which leads to heaven ; if thou shouldst walk in the way which leads to hell, thou wilt one day unhappily find thyself there.
Jesus, enlighten me; Jesus, strengthen me. Suffer me not to be separated from Thee.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. If then I be saved and enter into the house of bliss, I shall there be happy forever; but if I be lost and enter into the house of woe, I shall be miserable forever. If, therefore, I would be saved, I must keep eternity always before my eyes. He who frequently meditates upon eternity does not become attached to the goods of this world, and thus secures his salvation. I will endeavor, therefore, so to regulate all my actions that they may be so many steps towards a happy eternity.
O God! I believe in life eternal. Henceforth I will live only for Thee; hitherto I have lived for myself and have lost Thee, my sovereign good. I will never more lose Thee; but will forever serve and love Thee. Assist me, O Jesus! and do not abandon me. Mary, my Mother, protect me.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. It is said "he shall go," to give us to understand that each one shall go, in another life, into that house which he himself has chosen: " he shall go," he shall not be conducted, but shall go thither of his own free will. — Faith teaches us that, in the next life, there are two habitations: one is a palace of delights, where all are happy forever, and this is paradise; the other is a prison of excruciating torments, where all are forever miserable, and this is hell. Choose, my soul, to which of the two thou wilt go. If thou desirest heaven, thou must walk in the way which leads to heaven ; if thou shouldst walk in the way which leads to hell, thou wilt one day unhappily find thyself there.
Jesus, enlighten me; Jesus, strengthen me. Suffer me not to be separated from Thee.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. If then I be saved and enter into the house of bliss, I shall there be happy forever; but if I be lost and enter into the house of woe, I shall be miserable forever. If, therefore, I would be saved, I must keep eternity always before my eyes. He who frequently meditates upon eternity does not become attached to the goods of this world, and thus secures his salvation. I will endeavor, therefore, so to regulate all my actions that they may be so many steps towards a happy eternity.
O God! I believe in life eternal. Henceforth I will live only for Thee; hitherto I have lived for myself and have lost Thee, my sovereign good. I will never more lose Thee; but will forever serve and love Thee. Assist me, O Jesus! and do not abandon me. Mary, my Mother, protect me.
Wednesday
The Examination at the Particular Judgment
In the same moment and in the same place in which the soul departs from the body, the divine tribunal is erected, the indictment read, and the sentence pronounced by the sovereign judge. Whom he foreknew, says St. Paul, he also predestinated to be made conformable to his Son... them he also justified. (Romans 8:29) In order, therefore, to be made worthy of glory, our lives must be made conformable to the life of Jesus Christ. Hence it is that St. Peter says that, in the day of judgment, the just man shall scarcely be saved. (1Peter 4:18)
O Jesus, my Saviour and my judge! what will become of me, since my whole life has hitherto been the reverse of Thine? But Thy Passion is my hope. I am a sinner, but Thou canst make me a saint, and this I hope for from Thy bounty.
The Venerable Father Louis da Ponte, reflecting on the account which he should have to give of his whole life at the time of his death, trembled to such a degree as to make the whole room shake. And how ought we to tremble at the thought of this account! and how diligent ought we to be in seeking the Lord whilst we may find him! At the time of death it will be difficult to find him, if we are overtaken in our sins; but now we may easily find him by repentance and love. Seek ye the Lord, while he may be found: call upon him, while he is near. (Isaiah 55:6)
Yes, my God, I am sorry above every evil for having despised Thee; and I now esteem and love Thee above every good.
What shall I do, said holy Job, when God shall rise to judge? and when He shall examine, what shall I answer Him? (Job 31:14) And what shall I answer him, if, after so many mercies, so many calls, still I resist him?
No, Lord, I will no longer resist Thee, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. I have committed many offences and disloyalties against Thee, but Thou hast shed Thy blood to save me from my sins. "Help Thy servant whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood." (Ecclesiastes 12:5) I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart ; have pity on me. And O Mary, my Mother, do not abandon me!
O Jesus, my Saviour and my judge! what will become of me, since my whole life has hitherto been the reverse of Thine? But Thy Passion is my hope. I am a sinner, but Thou canst make me a saint, and this I hope for from Thy bounty.
The Venerable Father Louis da Ponte, reflecting on the account which he should have to give of his whole life at the time of his death, trembled to such a degree as to make the whole room shake. And how ought we to tremble at the thought of this account! and how diligent ought we to be in seeking the Lord whilst we may find him! At the time of death it will be difficult to find him, if we are overtaken in our sins; but now we may easily find him by repentance and love. Seek ye the Lord, while he may be found: call upon him, while he is near. (Isaiah 55:6)
Yes, my God, I am sorry above every evil for having despised Thee; and I now esteem and love Thee above every good.
What shall I do, said holy Job, when God shall rise to judge? and when He shall examine, what shall I answer Him? (Job 31:14) And what shall I answer him, if, after so many mercies, so many calls, still I resist him?
No, Lord, I will no longer resist Thee, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. I have committed many offences and disloyalties against Thee, but Thou hast shed Thy blood to save me from my sins. "Help Thy servant whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood." (Ecclesiastes 12:5) I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart ; have pity on me. And O Mary, my Mother, do not abandon me!
Monday
God Abandons the Sinner in his Sins
It is a grievous chastisement of God, when he cuts the sinner off in his sins; but still worse is that whereby he abandons him and suffers him to add sin upon sin. "No punishment is so great," says Bellarmin, "as when sin is made the punishment of sin."
I give Thee thanks, therefore, O Jesus! for not having suffered me to die in my sins; and I give Thee still greater thanks for not having abandoned me in my sins. And oh! into how much deeper an abyss of sin should I have fallen if Thou hadst not supported me. Continue, O Lord! to keep me from sin and do not forsake me.
I will take away the hedge thereof, and it shall be wasted. (Isaiah 5:5) When the master cuts down the fence of his vineyard, and leaves it open for any one to enter therein, it is a sign that he considers it not worth cultivating, and abandons it. In like manner does God proceed when he forsakes a sinful soul: he takes away from it the hedge of his holy fear, of his light, and of his voice; and hence the soul being blinded and enslaved by its vices, which overpower it, despises everything, the grace of God, heaven, admonitions, and censures; it thinks lightly even of its own damnation, and thus enveloped in darkness is certain to be lost forever. The wicked man, when he is come into the depths of sins, contemneth* (Proverbs 18:3)
This have I deserved, O God! for having so often despised Thy light and Thy calls. But I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me. I love Thee, O my God! and in Thee do I place all my hopes.
We would have cured Babylon, but she is not healed; let us forsake her. (Jeremiah 51:9) The physician visits the sick man, prescribes remedies for him, and makes him sensible of his maladies; but when he sees that his patient does not obey him, and on this account grows worse and worse, he takes leave of him and forsakes him. It is thus that God deals with obstinate sinners: after a certain time he speaks but little to them; and only assists them with grace just sufficient to enable them to save their souls; but they will not save them. The darkness of their minds, the hardness of their hearts, and the inveteracy of their wicked habits, render it morally impossible for them to gain salvation.
But, O God! since Thou still callest me to repentance, Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I desire never more to forsake Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee I am exceedingly sorry for having offended Thee. I love Thee, and I hope through Thy blood to love Thee forever. Suffer me not to be any more separated from Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, become my advocate.
*treat or regard with contempt.
I give Thee thanks, therefore, O Jesus! for not having suffered me to die in my sins; and I give Thee still greater thanks for not having abandoned me in my sins. And oh! into how much deeper an abyss of sin should I have fallen if Thou hadst not supported me. Continue, O Lord! to keep me from sin and do not forsake me.
I will take away the hedge thereof, and it shall be wasted. (Isaiah 5:5) When the master cuts down the fence of his vineyard, and leaves it open for any one to enter therein, it is a sign that he considers it not worth cultivating, and abandons it. In like manner does God proceed when he forsakes a sinful soul: he takes away from it the hedge of his holy fear, of his light, and of his voice; and hence the soul being blinded and enslaved by its vices, which overpower it, despises everything, the grace of God, heaven, admonitions, and censures; it thinks lightly even of its own damnation, and thus enveloped in darkness is certain to be lost forever. The wicked man, when he is come into the depths of sins, contemneth* (Proverbs 18:3)
This have I deserved, O God! for having so often despised Thy light and Thy calls. But I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me. I love Thee, O my God! and in Thee do I place all my hopes.
We would have cured Babylon, but she is not healed; let us forsake her. (Jeremiah 51:9) The physician visits the sick man, prescribes remedies for him, and makes him sensible of his maladies; but when he sees that his patient does not obey him, and on this account grows worse and worse, he takes leave of him and forsakes him. It is thus that God deals with obstinate sinners: after a certain time he speaks but little to them; and only assists them with grace just sufficient to enable them to save their souls; but they will not save them. The darkness of their minds, the hardness of their hearts, and the inveteracy of their wicked habits, render it morally impossible for them to gain salvation.
But, O God! since Thou still callest me to repentance, Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I desire never more to forsake Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee I am exceedingly sorry for having offended Thee. I love Thee, and I hope through Thy blood to love Thee forever. Suffer me not to be any more separated from Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, become my advocate.
*treat or regard with contempt.
Saturday
The Near Approach of Death
Every one knows that he must certainly die; yet many delude themselves by imagining that death is at so immense a distance from them that it will scarcely ever reach them. No; our life is indeed short, and death is very near us. The days of our sojourning here are few, and perhaps much fewer than we imagine. What else is our life but a light vapor, which is driven away and disappears with the wind? a blade of grass which is dried up in the heat of the sun?
O God ! Thou wouldst not suffer death to overtake me when I was under Thy displeasure, because Thou didst love me and didst desire my salvation; wherefore I will also love Thee.
My days, said holy Job, have been swifter than a post. (Job 9:25) Death is hasting towards us more rapidly than a post, and we at every step, and every breath and moment, are drawing nearer and nearer to death. At the time of our death how shall we wish for one day or one hour of the many we now squander away to no purpose !
Ah! Lord, if death were now announced to me, what should I find that I have done for Thee? Alas! come to my assistance; let me not die ungrateful to Thee as I hitherto have been. Grant me true sorrow for my sins, the gift of Thy love, and holy perseverance.
Death hastens towards us; wherefore we must also hasten to do that which is good, and to put our accounts in order against the day of its arrival. When death comes it precludes all remedies for what has been done amiss. How many are now in hell who thought of amending their lives at some future period, but were prevented by death and consigned to eternal torments!
My dear Redeemer, I will no longer resist Thy calls. Thou offerest me pardon, and I am desirous of obtaining it; I pray for it, and hope for it, through that death which Thou, my Jesus, hast suffered that Thou mayest be able to impart it to me. I am sorry, O infinite goodness, for having offended Thee. Thou, my Jesus, hast died for me, and I have postponed Thy friendship to my own wretched inclinations. For the future I hope with Thy assistance always to love Thee. I love Thee, O God ! I love Thee. Thou art now and shalt be forever my only good, my only love. Mary, mother of God, watch over me and take pity on me.
O God ! Thou wouldst not suffer death to overtake me when I was under Thy displeasure, because Thou didst love me and didst desire my salvation; wherefore I will also love Thee.
My days, said holy Job, have been swifter than a post. (Job 9:25) Death is hasting towards us more rapidly than a post, and we at every step, and every breath and moment, are drawing nearer and nearer to death. At the time of our death how shall we wish for one day or one hour of the many we now squander away to no purpose !
Ah! Lord, if death were now announced to me, what should I find that I have done for Thee? Alas! come to my assistance; let me not die ungrateful to Thee as I hitherto have been. Grant me true sorrow for my sins, the gift of Thy love, and holy perseverance.
Death hastens towards us; wherefore we must also hasten to do that which is good, and to put our accounts in order against the day of its arrival. When death comes it precludes all remedies for what has been done amiss. How many are now in hell who thought of amending their lives at some future period, but were prevented by death and consigned to eternal torments!
My dear Redeemer, I will no longer resist Thy calls. Thou offerest me pardon, and I am desirous of obtaining it; I pray for it, and hope for it, through that death which Thou, my Jesus, hast suffered that Thou mayest be able to impart it to me. I am sorry, O infinite goodness, for having offended Thee. Thou, my Jesus, hast died for me, and I have postponed Thy friendship to my own wretched inclinations. For the future I hope with Thy assistance always to love Thee. I love Thee, O God ! I love Thee. Thou art now and shalt be forever my only good, my only love. Mary, mother of God, watch over me and take pity on me.
Thursday
The Will of God to Save All
The Apostle St. Paul teaches us that God willeth the salvation of all: He will have all men to be saved; (Timothy 2:4) and St. Peter saith: the Lord dealeth patiently for your sake, not milling that any should perish, but that all should return to penance. (Peter 3:9) For this end the Son of God came down from heaven, and was made man, and spent thirty-three years in labors and sufferings, and finally shed his blood and laid down his life for our salvation; and shall we forfeit our salvation?
Thou, my Saviour, didst spend Thy whole life in securing my salvation, and in what have I spent so many years of my life ? What fruit hast Thou hitherto reaped from me? I have deserved to be cut off and cast into hell. But Thou desirest not the death of the sinner, but that he be converted and live." Yes, O God! I leave all and turn myself to Thee. I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee. Accept of me, and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more.
How much did the saints do to secure their eternal salvation! How many nobles and kings have forsaken their kingdoms and estates, and shut themselves up in cloisters ! How many young persons have forsaken their country and friends, and have dwelt in caves and deserts ! And how many martyrs have laid down their lives under the most cruel tortures! And why? — to save their souls. And what have we done?
Woe to me, who, although I know that death is near at hand, yet think not of it ! No, my God, I will no longer live at a distance from Thee. Why do I delay? Is it that death may overtake me in the miserable state in which I now am? No, my God, do Thou assist me to prepare for death.
O God, how many graces has my Saviour bestowed on me to enable me to save my soul ! He has caused me to be born in the bosom of the true Church; he has many times pardoned me my transgressions; he has favored me with many lights in sermons, in prayers, in meditations, in Communions, and spiritual exercises; and often has he called me to his love. In a word, how many means of salvation has he granted me which he has not granted others!
And yet, O God! when shall I detach myself from the world and give myself entirely to Thee ? Behold me, O Jesus! I will no longer resist. Thou hast obliged me to love Thee. I desire to be wholly Thine: do Thou accept of me, and disdain not the love of a sinner who has hitherto so much despised Thee. I love Thee, my God, my love, and my all; have pity on me, O Mary! —thou art my hope.
Thou, my Saviour, didst spend Thy whole life in securing my salvation, and in what have I spent so many years of my life ? What fruit hast Thou hitherto reaped from me? I have deserved to be cut off and cast into hell. But Thou desirest not the death of the sinner, but that he be converted and live." Yes, O God! I leave all and turn myself to Thee. I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee. Accept of me, and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more.
How much did the saints do to secure their eternal salvation! How many nobles and kings have forsaken their kingdoms and estates, and shut themselves up in cloisters ! How many young persons have forsaken their country and friends, and have dwelt in caves and deserts ! And how many martyrs have laid down their lives under the most cruel tortures! And why? — to save their souls. And what have we done?
Woe to me, who, although I know that death is near at hand, yet think not of it ! No, my God, I will no longer live at a distance from Thee. Why do I delay? Is it that death may overtake me in the miserable state in which I now am? No, my God, do Thou assist me to prepare for death.
O God, how many graces has my Saviour bestowed on me to enable me to save my soul ! He has caused me to be born in the bosom of the true Church; he has many times pardoned me my transgressions; he has favored me with many lights in sermons, in prayers, in meditations, in Communions, and spiritual exercises; and often has he called me to his love. In a word, how many means of salvation has he granted me which he has not granted others!
And yet, O God! when shall I detach myself from the world and give myself entirely to Thee ? Behold me, O Jesus! I will no longer resist. Thou hast obliged me to love Thee. I desire to be wholly Thine: do Thou accept of me, and disdain not the love of a sinner who has hitherto so much despised Thee. I love Thee, my God, my love, and my all; have pity on me, O Mary! —thou art my hope.
Wednesday
The Love of Jesus Crucified
Well might our loving Redeemer declare that he came upon the earth to enkindle divine love, and that he desired nothing else but to see this sacred fire burning in our hearts: I am come to cast fire upon the earth: and what will I but that it be kindled? (Luke 12:49) And, in fact, how many happy souls have been so inflamed with the thoughts of a crucified God as to forsake all things else to give themselves entirely to his holy love! What more could Jesus Christ have done to induce us to love him than to die in torments upon a cross to prove how much he loved us ? With good reason did St. Francis of Paula, when he contemplated with admiration Jesus crucified, exclaim in an ecstasy of love, " O charity! charity! charity!"
But alas, how generally do men live forgetful of so loving a God ! If the vilest of men—if a slave had done for me what Jesus Christ has done and suffered for me, how should I be able to live without loving him ? 0 God ! who is he that hangs upon the cross?—the same that created me and that now dies for me. That cross, those thorns, those nails, exclaim, and with a still louder voice those wounds cry out and demand our love.
"May I die," said St. Francis of Assisi, "for the love of Thy love, O Jesus! who hast died for the love of my love." To make an adequate return for the love of God in dying for us would require another God to die for him. It would be but little, it would be nothing, were each of us to give a thousand lives in return for the love of Jesus Christ. But Jesus is satisfied with our giving him our hearts; nevertheless he is not satisfied unless we give them entirely to him. For this end, says the Apostle, did he die, that he might have the entire dominion of our hearts: That He might be Lord both of the dead and of the living? (Romans 14:9)
My beloved Redeemer, how can I ever more forget Thee? how can I love anything else, after having seen Thee die in torments on an infamous gibbet to satisfy for my sins? and how can I reflect that my sins have reduced Thee to this, and not die with grief at the remembrance of the offences I have committed against Thee? Jesus, help me; I desire nothing but Thee; help me and love me. O Mary, my hope! assist me by thy prayers.
But alas, how generally do men live forgetful of so loving a God ! If the vilest of men—if a slave had done for me what Jesus Christ has done and suffered for me, how should I be able to live without loving him ? 0 God ! who is he that hangs upon the cross?—the same that created me and that now dies for me. That cross, those thorns, those nails, exclaim, and with a still louder voice those wounds cry out and demand our love.
"May I die," said St. Francis of Assisi, "for the love of Thy love, O Jesus! who hast died for the love of my love." To make an adequate return for the love of God in dying for us would require another God to die for him. It would be but little, it would be nothing, were each of us to give a thousand lives in return for the love of Jesus Christ. But Jesus is satisfied with our giving him our hearts; nevertheless he is not satisfied unless we give them entirely to him. For this end, says the Apostle, did he die, that he might have the entire dominion of our hearts: That He might be Lord both of the dead and of the living? (Romans 14:9)
My beloved Redeemer, how can I ever more forget Thee? how can I love anything else, after having seen Thee die in torments on an infamous gibbet to satisfy for my sins? and how can I reflect that my sins have reduced Thee to this, and not die with grief at the remembrance of the offences I have committed against Thee? Jesus, help me; I desire nothing but Thee; help me and love me. O Mary, my hope! assist me by thy prayers.
Tuesday
The Unhappy Life of the Sinner
There is no peace for the wicked. (Isaiah 48:22) The devil deceives poor sinners by making them believe that if they gratify their sensual desires, revenge themselves, or take what belongs to another, they will gain satisfaction and obtain peace: but no, for the reverse will always be their portion; the soul after sin becomes more than ever disquieted and afflicted. The brutes alone, who are created for the earth, can gain contentment from the enjoyments of the earth; but man, who is created to enjoy God, cannot derive satisfaction from any or all of God's creatures; his only source of happiness is God.
O my God ! what, of all the delights by which I have offended Thee, now remains but bitterness and sorrow to torment me? I do not regret the bitterness which they now cause me; but only the displeasure which they have given Thee, who hast so much loved me.
The wicked are like the raging sea, which cannot rest. (Isaiah 57:20) What is a soul in disgrace with God but a tempestuous sea, always in agitation? — one wave rises and another succeeds, and all are waves of pain and anguish. No one in the world can have all things according to his will. He who loves God, when adversity comes resigns himself to God's blessed will, and thus secures peace to his soul; but how can the sinner, if he is an enemy of God, pacify himself by resignation to God's holy appointments ? Besides, sin always brings with it the dread of divine vengeance. The wicked man fleeth, when no man pursueth. (Proverbs 28:1) Yes, for his own sin followeth after him, and by the remorse with which it preys upon his soul, makes him suffer an anticipated hell.
O my Lord and my God ! I am exceedingly sorry for having forsaken Thee; do Thou forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more.
Delight in the Lord, and He will give thee the requests of thy heart. (Psalm 36:4) Man, whither goest thou in search of content? Seek after God, and he will satisfy all the desires of thy soul. " Seek," says St. Augustine, "the one only good, in whom are all other goods." Behold a St. Francis, who when stripped of all worldly goods, being still united with God, found in this a heaven even here upon earth, and could not often enough exclaim, "My God ! my God and my all!"' Happy the soul that leaves all for God, for in him it finds all.
O Jesus! instead of abandoning me, as I have deserved, Thou offerest me pardon, and callest me to Thy love. Behold, I return to Thee overwhelmed with sorrow for the evil which I have done, and deeply affected at seeing that even still Thou lovest me after the many offences I have committed against Thee. Thou lovest me, and I also love Thee and love Thee more than myself. Receive me into Thy favor, and do with me whaf Thou pleasest; only do not deprive me of Thy love Mary, Mother, have pity on me.
O my God ! what, of all the delights by which I have offended Thee, now remains but bitterness and sorrow to torment me? I do not regret the bitterness which they now cause me; but only the displeasure which they have given Thee, who hast so much loved me.
The wicked are like the raging sea, which cannot rest. (Isaiah 57:20) What is a soul in disgrace with God but a tempestuous sea, always in agitation? — one wave rises and another succeeds, and all are waves of pain and anguish. No one in the world can have all things according to his will. He who loves God, when adversity comes resigns himself to God's blessed will, and thus secures peace to his soul; but how can the sinner, if he is an enemy of God, pacify himself by resignation to God's holy appointments ? Besides, sin always brings with it the dread of divine vengeance. The wicked man fleeth, when no man pursueth. (Proverbs 28:1) Yes, for his own sin followeth after him, and by the remorse with which it preys upon his soul, makes him suffer an anticipated hell.
O my Lord and my God ! I am exceedingly sorry for having forsaken Thee; do Thou forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more.
Delight in the Lord, and He will give thee the requests of thy heart. (Psalm 36:4) Man, whither goest thou in search of content? Seek after God, and he will satisfy all the desires of thy soul. " Seek," says St. Augustine, "the one only good, in whom are all other goods." Behold a St. Francis, who when stripped of all worldly goods, being still united with God, found in this a heaven even here upon earth, and could not often enough exclaim, "My God ! my God and my all!"' Happy the soul that leaves all for God, for in him it finds all.
O Jesus! instead of abandoning me, as I have deserved, Thou offerest me pardon, and callest me to Thy love. Behold, I return to Thee overwhelmed with sorrow for the evil which I have done, and deeply affected at seeing that even still Thou lovest me after the many offences I have committed against Thee. Thou lovest me, and I also love Thee and love Thee more than myself. Receive me into Thy favor, and do with me whaf Thou pleasest; only do not deprive me of Thy love Mary, Mother, have pity on me.
Monday
The Soul's Appearance at the Tribunal of God
When criminals are presented before their judges, though they fear and tremble, yet flatter themselves that either their crimes will not be proved against them, or that their judges will remit in part the punishments which they have deserved. O God! how great will be the horror of a guilty soul when presented before Jesus Christ, from whom nothing will be hidden, and who will judge it with the utmost severity! I am the Judge and the Witness, (Jeremiah 29:23) will he then say: "I am thy Judge, and I am witness of all the offences thou hast committed against me."
O my Jesus ! I deserved to hear this from Thy mouth, had the hour of my judgment arrived. But now Thou art pleased to assure me, that if I will repent of my sins, Thou wilt no longer remember them: I will not remember all his iniquities? (Ezekiel 18:22)
It is the opinion of divines, that in the same place in which the soul is separated from the body it will be judged, and its lot decided either for eternal life or eternal death. But should the soul unhappily depart from the body in sin, what will it be able to say when Jesus Christ reminds it of his abused mercies, of the years he granted it, of the calls by which he invited it, and of the many other means which he afforded it of securing its salvation ?
Jesus, my Redeemer! Thou who condemnest obstinate sinners, dost not condemn those who love Thee and who are sorry for having offended Thee. I am a sinner, but I love Thee more than myself, and I am sorry above every evil for having displeased Thee; oh, do Thou pardon me before the time comes when Thou wilt judge me!
At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
When, therefore, O my Jesus and my Judge! Thou shalt judge me, after my death, Thy wounds will be a terror to me, reproaching me with my ingratitude for the love which Thou hast shown me in suffering and dying for me, but now they encourage me and give me confidence to hope for pardon from Thee, my Redeemer who for the love of me, and that Thou mayest not have to condemn me, didst suffer Thyself to be tormented and crucified. We therefore pray Thee, help Thy servants whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood. O my Jesus ! have pity on me, who am one of those sheep for whom Thou didst shed Thy sacred blood. If hitherto I have despised Thee, I now esteem and love Thee above all things. Make known to me the means by which I may be saved, and strengthen me to fulfil Thy holy will. I will no longer abuse Thy goodness. Thou hast placed me under too many obligations to Thee; I will no longer suffer myself to live at a distance from Thee and deprived of Thy love. Mary, Mother of mercy, have compassion on me.
O my Jesus ! I deserved to hear this from Thy mouth, had the hour of my judgment arrived. But now Thou art pleased to assure me, that if I will repent of my sins, Thou wilt no longer remember them: I will not remember all his iniquities? (Ezekiel 18:22)
It is the opinion of divines, that in the same place in which the soul is separated from the body it will be judged, and its lot decided either for eternal life or eternal death. But should the soul unhappily depart from the body in sin, what will it be able to say when Jesus Christ reminds it of his abused mercies, of the years he granted it, of the calls by which he invited it, and of the many other means which he afforded it of securing its salvation ?
Jesus, my Redeemer! Thou who condemnest obstinate sinners, dost not condemn those who love Thee and who are sorry for having offended Thee. I am a sinner, but I love Thee more than myself, and I am sorry above every evil for having displeased Thee; oh, do Thou pardon me before the time comes when Thou wilt judge me!
At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
When, therefore, O my Jesus and my Judge! Thou shalt judge me, after my death, Thy wounds will be a terror to me, reproaching me with my ingratitude for the love which Thou hast shown me in suffering and dying for me, but now they encourage me and give me confidence to hope for pardon from Thee, my Redeemer who for the love of me, and that Thou mayest not have to condemn me, didst suffer Thyself to be tormented and crucified. We therefore pray Thee, help Thy servants whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood. O my Jesus ! have pity on me, who am one of those sheep for whom Thou didst shed Thy sacred blood. If hitherto I have despised Thee, I now esteem and love Thee above all things. Make known to me the means by which I may be saved, and strengthen me to fulfil Thy holy will. I will no longer abuse Thy goodness. Thou hast placed me under too many obligations to Thee; I will no longer suffer myself to live at a distance from Thee and deprived of Thy love. Mary, Mother of mercy, have compassion on me.
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