Thus does the royal prophet speak of sinners: They tempted and provoked the most high God. (Psalm 77:56) God is incapable of grief; but were it possible for him to grieve, every sin that men commit would deeply afflict him and deprive him of happiness.
Sin, O God! is the return I have made Thee for Thy love! How often have I renounced Thy friendship for the sake of some wretched self-gratification O infinite goodness! because Thou art such, pardon me my offences.
St. Bernard, moreover, adds that the malice of sin is so great that it would annihilate God, were this possible." If God could die, mortal sin would deprive him of life. And how? Father Medina answers, "Because it would give him infinite sorrow." How afflicting is it to be injured by those whom we have especially befriended and loved! What then must it be for God to behold man, whom he has favored with so many and so great benefits and loved with so great love, even to shedding his blood and laying down his life, — what must it be to behold man turn his back upon him and despise his grace for a mere nothing, for a fit of passion, or a momentary pleasure! Were he capable of grief and sadness, he would die of the bitterness which such conduct would occasion him. Then he saith to them: My soul is sorrowful even unto death. Stay you here and watch with me. (Matthew 26:38)
Dearest Jesus, I am the lost sheep; Thou art the good shepherd who hast laid down Thy life for Thy sheep; have pity on me, pardon me for all the displeasure which my sins have occasioned Thee. I am grieved, O Jesus! for having offended Thee, and love Thee with my whole soul.
It was because our loving Redeemer had our sins constantly before his eyes that his life was so painful and full of bitterness. This was the cause of his sweating blood and suffering the agonies of death in the garden of Gethsemane, where he declared that "his soul was sorrowful even unto death." What made him sweat blood and cast him into so dreadful an agony but the sight of the sins of men?
Give me then, O Jesus ! a share of the sorrow which then oppressed Thee for my sins; grant that it may afflict me during my whole life, and, if Thou pleasest, even unto death. O Jesus! I desire nevermore to displease Thee, I will nevermore afflict Thee, but will love Thee with all my strength, who art my love, my life, and my only good. Suffer me not to offend Thee any more. Mary, my hope, have compassion on me.
Friday
Sunday
The Vanity of the World
Only the grave, saith holy Job, remaineth for me. (Job 17:1) Days and years pass away, pleasures, honors, and riches pass away, and what will be the end ? Death will come and strip us of all, and we shall be buried in the grave to corrupt and moulder into dust, deserted and forgotten by all. Alas! how, in the end of our lives, will the remembrance of all we have acquired in this world serve for nothing but to increase our anguish and our uncertainty of salvation!
O death, O death, never depart from before my eyes. O God, do Thou enlighten me.
My life is cut off as by a weaver. (Isaiah 38:12) How many, in the midst of executing their long-contemplated designs, are overtaken by death and deprived of all things! Ah, with what pain and remorse will the goods of this world be regarded, on the bed of death, by those who have been unduly attached to them! To worldlings who are spiritually blind the goods of this present life appear great; but death will discover what they really are: dust—smoke, and vainity. Before the light of this last lamp all the dazzling grandeur of this world will vanish and disappear. The greatest fortunes, the highest honors, when considered on the bed of death, will lose all their value and splendor. The shade of death will obscure even crowns and sceptres.
Grant me, O God! Thy holy grace, for this alone is all I desire. I am grieved for having ever despised such a treasure. Jesus, have pity on me.
Of what avail then will riches be at the hour of death, when nothing will remain for us but a wooden coffin and a winding-sheet? Of what avail will be the honors which we have acquired, when no others will remain for us but a funeral procession and a tomb, which will not be able to afford us the least satisfaction, if our souls should be lost? And of what avail will the beauty of the body be, when the body itself will become a mass of worms, infect the air with its stench, and excite horror in all who behold it ?
My dear Redeemer, although I knew that by sinning I should forfeit Thy friendship, yet did I sin; but I hope for pardon from Thee who hast died to purchase pardon for me. Oh that I had never offended Thee, my good God! I behold the love which Thou hast. shown me; and this increases my grief for having displeased Thee who art so good a Father. I love Thee, O Lord! and will never live without loving Thee; give me perseverance. Mary, my mother, pray to Jesus for me.
O death, O death, never depart from before my eyes. O God, do Thou enlighten me.
My life is cut off as by a weaver. (Isaiah 38:12) How many, in the midst of executing their long-contemplated designs, are overtaken by death and deprived of all things! Ah, with what pain and remorse will the goods of this world be regarded, on the bed of death, by those who have been unduly attached to them! To worldlings who are spiritually blind the goods of this present life appear great; but death will discover what they really are: dust—smoke, and vainity. Before the light of this last lamp all the dazzling grandeur of this world will vanish and disappear. The greatest fortunes, the highest honors, when considered on the bed of death, will lose all their value and splendor. The shade of death will obscure even crowns and sceptres.
Grant me, O God! Thy holy grace, for this alone is all I desire. I am grieved for having ever despised such a treasure. Jesus, have pity on me.
Of what avail then will riches be at the hour of death, when nothing will remain for us but a wooden coffin and a winding-sheet? Of what avail will be the honors which we have acquired, when no others will remain for us but a funeral procession and a tomb, which will not be able to afford us the least satisfaction, if our souls should be lost? And of what avail will the beauty of the body be, when the body itself will become a mass of worms, infect the air with its stench, and excite horror in all who behold it ?
My dear Redeemer, although I knew that by sinning I should forfeit Thy friendship, yet did I sin; but I hope for pardon from Thee who hast died to purchase pardon for me. Oh that I had never offended Thee, my good God! I behold the love which Thou hast. shown me; and this increases my grief for having displeased Thee who art so good a Father. I love Thee, O Lord! and will never live without loving Thee; give me perseverance. Mary, my mother, pray to Jesus for me.
Friday
The Certainty of Being Either Saved or Lost
With fear and trembling, saith the Apostle, work out your salvation. (Philippians 2:12) In order to be saved we should tremble lest we be lost, for there is no medium; we must be either saved or lost forever. He who trembles not is in great danger of being lost, because he takes but little care to employ the means of obtaining salvation. God desires that all should be saved, and he gives to all his grace; but he requires that all should co-operate for this end. All desire to be saved; many, because they will not employ the means of salvation, are lost. St. Philip Neri used to say, " Heaven is not made for the slothful."
Enlighten me, O Lord, that I may know what I ought to do, and what to avoid, for I desire to do all that Thou requirest of me. I am determined, by Thy grace, to save my soul.
St. Teresa said to her religious, "One soul! my daughters, one eternity!" She meant that in this world we ought not to attend to anything but to the salvation of our souls; because if the soul be lost, all will be lost; and if once lost, will be lost forever. Benedict XII, being asked by a prince for a favor that he could not grant without committing sin, answered the ambassador: "Tell your prince that if I had two souls I would give him one, but as I have only one, I cannot consent to lose it for his sake." Thus should we answer the devil or the world when they offer us forbidden fruit.
O God! how often have I lost my soul by forfeiting Thy grace! But since Thou offerest me Thy pardon, I detest all the offences I have committed against Thee, and love Thee above all things.
Would that we were fully impressed with the meaning of that great maxim of St. Francis Xavier, "There is but one evil, and there is but one good in the world!" The only evil is damnation; the only good, salvation. No; poverty, infirmity, ignominies are not evils; these when embraced with resignation will increase our glory in heaven. On the other hand, health, riches, and honors are not goods for too many Christians, because they become to them greater occasion of losing their souls.
Save me then, O God! and do with me what Thou pleasest. Thou knowest and willest what is best for me. I abandon myself to Thy mercy: Into Thy hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit. (Psalms 30:6) I am so sorry for having been hitherto opposed to Thy will, as to die to expiate my offences; but now I love Thee, and will nothing but what Thou willest. Grant me Thy love, that I may be faithful to Thee. And, Mary, give me thy powerful assistance.
Enlighten me, O Lord, that I may know what I ought to do, and what to avoid, for I desire to do all that Thou requirest of me. I am determined, by Thy grace, to save my soul.
St. Teresa said to her religious, "One soul! my daughters, one eternity!" She meant that in this world we ought not to attend to anything but to the salvation of our souls; because if the soul be lost, all will be lost; and if once lost, will be lost forever. Benedict XII, being asked by a prince for a favor that he could not grant without committing sin, answered the ambassador: "Tell your prince that if I had two souls I would give him one, but as I have only one, I cannot consent to lose it for his sake." Thus should we answer the devil or the world when they offer us forbidden fruit.
O God! how often have I lost my soul by forfeiting Thy grace! But since Thou offerest me Thy pardon, I detest all the offences I have committed against Thee, and love Thee above all things.
Would that we were fully impressed with the meaning of that great maxim of St. Francis Xavier, "There is but one evil, and there is but one good in the world!" The only evil is damnation; the only good, salvation. No; poverty, infirmity, ignominies are not evils; these when embraced with resignation will increase our glory in heaven. On the other hand, health, riches, and honors are not goods for too many Christians, because they become to them greater occasion of losing their souls.
Save me then, O God! and do with me what Thou pleasest. Thou knowest and willest what is best for me. I abandon myself to Thy mercy: Into Thy hands, O Lord, I commend my spirit. (Psalms 30:6) I am so sorry for having been hitherto opposed to Thy will, as to die to expiate my offences; but now I love Thee, and will nothing but what Thou willest. Grant me Thy love, that I may be faithful to Thee. And, Mary, give me thy powerful assistance.
Monday
The Death of Jesus for the Love of Men
Was it ever possible that God, the Creator of all things, should have been pleased to die for the love of his creatures? It is of faith that he has done so. He hath loved us, and hath delivered Himself for us. (Ephesians 5:2) The earth, the heavens, and all nature, with astonishment beheld Jesus, the only begotten Son of God, the lord of the universe, die of intense pain and anguish, on a disgraceful cross; and why ? For the love of men. And do men believe this and not love God?
I have believed it, O Jesus! and yet not only have I not loved Thee, but I have frequently offended Thee. Pardon me, I beseech Thee, and remind me continually of the death which Thou hast suffered for me, that I may nevermore offend Thee, but may always love Thee.
It was not necessary for man's salvation that God should die; one drop of his blood, a single tear, or a prayer would have been sufficient, because being of infinite value, it would have redeemed this or a thousand other worlds.
But, O Jesus! Thou wouldst suffer so much, to teach us Thy great love for us. Hence, St. Bonaventure exclaims, but with much greater reason may I exclaim, who have so often offended my Redeemer: "Alas! my God, why hast Thou so much loved me? why, O Lord, why? Who am I ?" O divine Pastor of my soul, behold I am the lost sheep, in quest of which Thou didst come upon the earth. I have ungratefully fled away from Thee; since, unmindful of the sufferings which I have occasioned Thee, Thou callest me, miserable as I am, but overcome with Thy great goodness, embracing Thy sacred feet, nailed to the cross. Jesus, my love, my treasure! I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee.
St. Bernard, imagining himself present when Pilate passed sentence of death on our Blessed Saviour, thus addresses him: "What hast Thou done, my most innocent Saviour, that Thou shouldst be thus condemned?" Thou art innocence itself; and how do I now behold Thee condemned to death, even to the death of the cross? What crime hast Thou committed?" And he proceeds to answer, "Thy crime is love." As if he had said, Ah! it is Thy too great love for us, and not Pilate, that condemns Thee to death.
When, my dear Redeemer, I remember the offences I have committed against Thee, it is not hell, which I have deserved for them, that makes me grieve, but the love which Thou hast shown me. Ah ! my crucified God, I desire to be henceforth and forever Thine, and I will love no other but Thee. Strengthen my weakness, and make me faithful to Thee. Holy Mary, mother of God, enable me to love Jesus; this is the only favor I ask.
I have believed it, O Jesus! and yet not only have I not loved Thee, but I have frequently offended Thee. Pardon me, I beseech Thee, and remind me continually of the death which Thou hast suffered for me, that I may nevermore offend Thee, but may always love Thee.
It was not necessary for man's salvation that God should die; one drop of his blood, a single tear, or a prayer would have been sufficient, because being of infinite value, it would have redeemed this or a thousand other worlds.
But, O Jesus! Thou wouldst suffer so much, to teach us Thy great love for us. Hence, St. Bonaventure exclaims, but with much greater reason may I exclaim, who have so often offended my Redeemer: "Alas! my God, why hast Thou so much loved me? why, O Lord, why? Who am I ?" O divine Pastor of my soul, behold I am the lost sheep, in quest of which Thou didst come upon the earth. I have ungratefully fled away from Thee; since, unmindful of the sufferings which I have occasioned Thee, Thou callest me, miserable as I am, but overcome with Thy great goodness, embracing Thy sacred feet, nailed to the cross. Jesus, my love, my treasure! I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee.
St. Bernard, imagining himself present when Pilate passed sentence of death on our Blessed Saviour, thus addresses him: "What hast Thou done, my most innocent Saviour, that Thou shouldst be thus condemned?" Thou art innocence itself; and how do I now behold Thee condemned to death, even to the death of the cross? What crime hast Thou committed?" And he proceeds to answer, "Thy crime is love." As if he had said, Ah! it is Thy too great love for us, and not Pilate, that condemns Thee to death.
When, my dear Redeemer, I remember the offences I have committed against Thee, it is not hell, which I have deserved for them, that makes me grieve, but the love which Thou hast shown me. Ah ! my crucified God, I desire to be henceforth and forever Thine, and I will love no other but Thee. Strengthen my weakness, and make me faithful to Thee. Holy Mary, mother of God, enable me to love Jesus; this is the only favor I ask.
Friday
The Uncertainty of Grace
Delay not to be converted to the Lord, and put it not off from day to day: for His wrath shall come on a sudden, and in the time of vengeance will He destroy thee. (Revelation 9:6) The Lord admonishes us to be speedily converted, if we would be saved; because if we go on putting off our conversion from day to day, the time of vengeance will come, when God will neither call nor wait for us any longer; death will overtake us in sin, and there will be no means of escaping eternal damnation. God admonishes us in this manner, because he loves us and wills not to see us perish.
I am convinced, O God! that Thou desirest my salvation; I know that Thou desirest to deal with me in Thy mercy; and it is my desire nevermore to despise Thee.
Alas! to how many are the admonitions given by God during life, become now in hell the most cruel swords that pierce their souls! In proportion as the mercies which God showed them were greater, so were their crimes more enormous.
If, O Jesus! Thou hadst condemned me to hell, as I have deserved, how great would have been my punishment, since Thy graces and favors have been so abundant towards me! No, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. Say to me what Thou pleasest, and I will obey Thee in all things. I am sorry for having so often offended Thee; henceforward I will not seek to please myself, but to please only Thee, my God and only good.
How cautious are men in their temporal affairs, and yet how negligent in the affairs of eternity! If a man has to receive a sum of money from another, he uses every expedient to obtain it as quickly as possible, saying, "Who knows what may happen?" And yet, why do so many live months and years in sin? Because they do not say, when the soul is at stake, "Who knows what may happen ?" If money be lost, however valuable it may be, all is not lost; but if the soul be lost, all is lost, and must be lost forever, without hope of recovery.
My beloved Redeemer, Thou hast given me life that I may become worthy of Thy grace; and yet I have often renounced Thy grace for something worse than nothing. Pardon me, O infinite goodness! for I am sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for having done so. O Jesus ! Thou hast done too much to oblige me to love Thee, and I desire to love Thee to the utmost of my power. I love Thee, my sovereign good, I love Thee more than myself. Permit me not, O God ! to cease to love Thee any more. O Mary, holy queen! protect me.
I am convinced, O God! that Thou desirest my salvation; I know that Thou desirest to deal with me in Thy mercy; and it is my desire nevermore to despise Thee.
Alas! to how many are the admonitions given by God during life, become now in hell the most cruel swords that pierce their souls! In proportion as the mercies which God showed them were greater, so were their crimes more enormous.
If, O Jesus! Thou hadst condemned me to hell, as I have deserved, how great would have been my punishment, since Thy graces and favors have been so abundant towards me! No, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. Say to me what Thou pleasest, and I will obey Thee in all things. I am sorry for having so often offended Thee; henceforward I will not seek to please myself, but to please only Thee, my God and only good.
How cautious are men in their temporal affairs, and yet how negligent in the affairs of eternity! If a man has to receive a sum of money from another, he uses every expedient to obtain it as quickly as possible, saying, "Who knows what may happen?" And yet, why do so many live months and years in sin? Because they do not say, when the soul is at stake, "Who knows what may happen ?" If money be lost, however valuable it may be, all is not lost; but if the soul be lost, all is lost, and must be lost forever, without hope of recovery.
My beloved Redeemer, Thou hast given me life that I may become worthy of Thy grace; and yet I have often renounced Thy grace for something worse than nothing. Pardon me, O infinite goodness! for I am sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for having done so. O Jesus ! Thou hast done too much to oblige me to love Thee, and I desire to love Thee to the utmost of my power. I love Thee, my sovereign good, I love Thee more than myself. Permit me not, O God ! to cease to love Thee any more. O Mary, holy queen! protect me.
Wednesday
The Eternity of Hell
If hell were not eternal, it would not be hell. Punishment that does not continue for a long time is not grievous punishment. On the other hand, punishment, however light it may be, when it continues for a long time, becomes intolerable. Were a person obliged during the whole of his life to see the same entertainments, or to hear the same music, how could he endure it? What then must it be to remain in hell and to suffer all its torments! And for how long a time? For all eternity. It would be folly, for the sake of a day's pleasure, to condemn one's self to be burnt alive. And is it not folly, for the sake of a sensual gratification, which can last but for one moment, to condemn one's self to the fire of hell, whose victims, though dying every moment, yet never, never die?
O God! preserve me by Thy grace. Woe to me if I should turn my back upon Thee after the great mercy with which Thou hast dealt with me! Keep me, O God! and preserve me from so great a misfortune.
Let us awaken our slumbering faith. It is certain that he who is lost is lost forever, without the least hope of being redeemed from eternal ruin. They shall go into eternal punishment. (Matthew 25:46) He who once enters the prison of hell can come out no more. Otherwise the condemned wretches would flatter themselves with hopes, and would say, Who knows, perhaps God may some day have pity on us and deliver us? But no, they well know that hell will never have an end, and that they must continue to suffer the same torments that they at present endure so long as God shall be God. My dear Redeemer, I know too well that by the past I have forfeited Thy grace, and condemned myself to hell; but I do not know whether Thou hast pardoned me. Hasten to forgive me, O Jesus! while I bitterly lament my offences against Thee, and never suffer me to offend Thee any more.
In this life death is of all things the most dreaded, but in hell it is of all things the most desired. There they desire and long for death, but cannot die. They shall desire to die, and death shall fly from them. (Revelations 9:6) Are there not at least, in that place of torments, some to compassionate them? No, all hate them, and rejoice in their sufferings, which will last forever, without end of mitigation. The trumpet of divine justice continually sounds and thunders forth in their ears those terrible words: "Ever, ever; never, never."
Amongst these miserable beings, O Jesus! I have deserved to be numbered; but do Thou, who hast hitherto preserved me. from falling into hell, preserve me for the future from falling into sin, which alone can condemn me to that place of woe. Ah! never suffer me again to become Thy enemy. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and I am sorry for having offended Thee. Pardon me, and as I have deserved to burn forever in the fire of hell, grant me to burn forever with the fire of Thy holy love. O Mary, in thy powerful intercession do I confide.
O God! preserve me by Thy grace. Woe to me if I should turn my back upon Thee after the great mercy with which Thou hast dealt with me! Keep me, O God! and preserve me from so great a misfortune.
Let us awaken our slumbering faith. It is certain that he who is lost is lost forever, without the least hope of being redeemed from eternal ruin. They shall go into eternal punishment. (Matthew 25:46) He who once enters the prison of hell can come out no more. Otherwise the condemned wretches would flatter themselves with hopes, and would say, Who knows, perhaps God may some day have pity on us and deliver us? But no, they well know that hell will never have an end, and that they must continue to suffer the same torments that they at present endure so long as God shall be God. My dear Redeemer, I know too well that by the past I have forfeited Thy grace, and condemned myself to hell; but I do not know whether Thou hast pardoned me. Hasten to forgive me, O Jesus! while I bitterly lament my offences against Thee, and never suffer me to offend Thee any more.
In this life death is of all things the most dreaded, but in hell it is of all things the most desired. There they desire and long for death, but cannot die. They shall desire to die, and death shall fly from them. (Revelations 9:6) Are there not at least, in that place of torments, some to compassionate them? No, all hate them, and rejoice in their sufferings, which will last forever, without end of mitigation. The trumpet of divine justice continually sounds and thunders forth in their ears those terrible words: "Ever, ever; never, never."
Amongst these miserable beings, O Jesus! I have deserved to be numbered; but do Thou, who hast hitherto preserved me. from falling into hell, preserve me for the future from falling into sin, which alone can condemn me to that place of woe. Ah! never suffer me again to become Thy enemy. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and I am sorry for having offended Thee. Pardon me, and as I have deserved to burn forever in the fire of hell, grant me to burn forever with the fire of Thy holy love. O Mary, in thy powerful intercession do I confide.
Tuesday
An Unprovided Death
Nothing is more certain than death, but nothing more uncertain than the hour of death. It is certain that the year and day of each one's death are already determined by our Lord, though we know them not; and wisely does God conceal them from us, in order that we may always prepare for our departure.
I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me, and for not having called me out of life in the state of mortal sin. During the remainder of my life I will bewail my iniquities and love Thee with all my strength. I know that I must die, and by Thy grace I will prepare myself for a good death.
Jesus Christ admonishes us of the hour of our death, and when will it be? when we least expect it. At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40) If then, says St. Bernard, death may at any time take us out of life, we should at all times be prepared for Stand keep our accounts in order.
O Jesus! I will not wait until the moment of my death to give myself to Thee. Thou hast said that those who seek Thee shall find Thee: Seek and ye shall find.(Matthew 7:7) I seek Thee, I desire Thee; grant that I may find Thee. I am sorry for my sins and will nevermore offend Thee.
When then, dear Christian, you are tempted to commit sin with the hope of confessing it on the morrow, say to yourself: But who knows but that this moment may be my last? And if in this moment I should be guilty of sin, and death should overtake me, whither should I go? O God! how many miserable sinners have been struck by death in the act of feasting themselves on some poisonous gratification! The devil will say to you: This misfortune will not befall you. But do you answer him: If it should befall me, what will become of me for eternity?
O God! may not that happen to me which has happened to so many other unhappy sinners? How many are now in hell tor lesser sins than I have committed! I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me with so much patience, and for having now enlightened me. I have erred in forsaking Thee; and death might have been my punishment; but since Thou givest me time, henceforward I will think of nothing but of loving Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And do thou, Mary, assist me by thy holy intercession.
I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me, and for not having called me out of life in the state of mortal sin. During the remainder of my life I will bewail my iniquities and love Thee with all my strength. I know that I must die, and by Thy grace I will prepare myself for a good death.
Jesus Christ admonishes us of the hour of our death, and when will it be? when we least expect it. At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40) If then, says St. Bernard, death may at any time take us out of life, we should at all times be prepared for Stand keep our accounts in order.
O Jesus! I will not wait until the moment of my death to give myself to Thee. Thou hast said that those who seek Thee shall find Thee: Seek and ye shall find.(Matthew 7:7) I seek Thee, I desire Thee; grant that I may find Thee. I am sorry for my sins and will nevermore offend Thee.
When then, dear Christian, you are tempted to commit sin with the hope of confessing it on the morrow, say to yourself: But who knows but that this moment may be my last? And if in this moment I should be guilty of sin, and death should overtake me, whither should I go? O God! how many miserable sinners have been struck by death in the act of feasting themselves on some poisonous gratification! The devil will say to you: This misfortune will not befall you. But do you answer him: If it should befall me, what will become of me for eternity?
O God! may not that happen to me which has happened to so many other unhappy sinners? How many are now in hell tor lesser sins than I have committed! I give Thee thanks, O Jesus! for having waited for me with so much patience, and for having now enlightened me. I have erred in forsaking Thee; and death might have been my punishment; but since Thou givest me time, henceforward I will think of nothing but of loving Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And do thou, Mary, assist me by thy holy intercession.
Sunday
The Sentence of Particular Judgment
Oh! what joy will he experience who, departing out of this life in the grace of God, will, on being presented before Jesus Christ, behold him with a benignant countenance, be lovingly received by him, and hear from him those delightful words: Well done, thou good and faithful servant: because thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will place thee over many things : enter thou into the joy of thy Lord. (Matthew 25:23)
But, O Jesus! if I were now to be summoned to judgment before Thee, how could I hope that Thou wouldst call me a good and faithful servant, when I have hitherto been so bad and faithless towards Thee, changing my promises of fidelity into treasons? But I will be faithful to Thee for the future, and will sooner lose my life a thousand times than forfeit Thy grace. Do Thou give me strength to fulfil this my resolution.
On the other hand, what anguish, O Jesus! will that sinner experience, who, dying in sin, and being presented before Thee, beholds Thy wrathful countenance! The soul that departs this life in God's displeasure will first condemn itself, and will then hear from Jesus Christ that terrible sentence: Depart from me, thou accursed, into everlasting fire. (Matthew 25:41)
How often, O Jesus, have I deserved to hear from Thee the same sentence when I have committed mortal sin! When death overtakes me, Thou wilt then be my judge; but now Thou art my Father and Redeemer, ready to pardon me, if I am sorry for having offended Thee. I am therefore sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for all my offences against Thee; and I am sorry, not so much on account of hell which I have deserved by them, as because by them I have grievously offended Thee, who hast loved me with an infinite love.
The soul goes forth and leaves the body, but it is for some time doubtful whether the person be alive or dead. While the bystanders are doubting, the soul has already entered eternity. The priest, satisfied at length that the man is dead, recites the prayer of the Church: "Come to his assistance, all ye saints of God: meet him, all ye angels of God: receive his soul and present it now before its Lord.'" But of what avail will it be to the soul that has departed an enemy of God, and upon which sentence has already been passed, to call the saints and angels to its assistance?"
O my good angel, ye saints, my holy advocates, St. Michael, St. Joseph, and you my holy protectress Mary! help me now whilst you have it in your power. And Thou, my Redeemer, pardon me now whilst Thou dost exercise mercy. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart. Assist me, O Lord! and support me, that I may never offend Thee more. O Mary! take me forever to thy care.
But, O Jesus! if I were now to be summoned to judgment before Thee, how could I hope that Thou wouldst call me a good and faithful servant, when I have hitherto been so bad and faithless towards Thee, changing my promises of fidelity into treasons? But I will be faithful to Thee for the future, and will sooner lose my life a thousand times than forfeit Thy grace. Do Thou give me strength to fulfil this my resolution.
On the other hand, what anguish, O Jesus! will that sinner experience, who, dying in sin, and being presented before Thee, beholds Thy wrathful countenance! The soul that departs this life in God's displeasure will first condemn itself, and will then hear from Jesus Christ that terrible sentence: Depart from me, thou accursed, into everlasting fire. (Matthew 25:41)
How often, O Jesus, have I deserved to hear from Thee the same sentence when I have committed mortal sin! When death overtakes me, Thou wilt then be my judge; but now Thou art my Father and Redeemer, ready to pardon me, if I am sorry for having offended Thee. I am therefore sorry, from the bottom of my heart, for all my offences against Thee; and I am sorry, not so much on account of hell which I have deserved by them, as because by them I have grievously offended Thee, who hast loved me with an infinite love.
The soul goes forth and leaves the body, but it is for some time doubtful whether the person be alive or dead. While the bystanders are doubting, the soul has already entered eternity. The priest, satisfied at length that the man is dead, recites the prayer of the Church: "Come to his assistance, all ye saints of God: meet him, all ye angels of God: receive his soul and present it now before its Lord.'" But of what avail will it be to the soul that has departed an enemy of God, and upon which sentence has already been passed, to call the saints and angels to its assistance?"
O my good angel, ye saints, my holy advocates, St. Michael, St. Joseph, and you my holy protectress Mary! help me now whilst you have it in your power. And Thou, my Redeemer, pardon me now whilst Thou dost exercise mercy. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart. Assist me, O Lord! and support me, that I may never offend Thee more. O Mary! take me forever to thy care.
Wednesday
The Desire of God to Save Sinners
It is indeed very surprising that man, a worm of the earth, should dare to offend his Creator and turn his back upon him, by despising his graces after God has so favored and loved him as to lay down his life to save him. But it is still more surprising that God, after having been thus despised by man, should seek after him, invite him to repentance and offer him his pardon, as though God stood in need of us and not we of him.
O Jesus! Thou seekest me, and I seek after Thee. Thou desirest me, and I desire only Thee.
For Christ, saith the Apostle, we beseech you, be recon died to God. (2 Corinthians 5:20) "And does God," exclaims St. Chrysostom, "call thus upon sinners? And what does he ask of them? to be reconciled, and be in peace with him."
My Redeemer, Jesus Christ, how couldst Thou have had so much love for me, who have so often offended Thee? I detest all my offences against Thee; give me Still greater grief, still greater love, that I may deplore my sins, not so much on account of the punishments I have deserved by them, as for the injury I have offered to Thee, my God, who art infinitely good and amiable.
What is man, exclaims holy Job, that thou shouldst magnify him for why dost thou set the heart upon him? (Job 7:17)
What good, O Lord! hast Thou ever derived from me? and what canst Thou expect from me, that Thou lovest me so much, and comest so near to me? Hast Thou then forgotten all the injuries and treasons which I have committed against Thee? But since Thou hast so much loved me, I, a miserable worm, must also love Thee, my Creator and my Redeemer. Yes, I do love Thee, my God ; I love Thee with my whole heart, I love Thee more than myself, and because I love Thee I will do everything to please Thee. — Thou knowest that nothing is so grievous to me as the remembrance of my having so often despised Thy love. I hope for the future to be able to compensate by my love for the frequent displeasure which I have given Thee. Help me for the sake of that precious blood which Thou hast shed for me. Help me also, O holy Mary ! for the love of thy Son who died for me.
O Jesus! Thou seekest me, and I seek after Thee. Thou desirest me, and I desire only Thee.
For Christ, saith the Apostle, we beseech you, be recon died to God. (2 Corinthians 5:20) "And does God," exclaims St. Chrysostom, "call thus upon sinners? And what does he ask of them? to be reconciled, and be in peace with him."
My Redeemer, Jesus Christ, how couldst Thou have had so much love for me, who have so often offended Thee? I detest all my offences against Thee; give me Still greater grief, still greater love, that I may deplore my sins, not so much on account of the punishments I have deserved by them, as for the injury I have offered to Thee, my God, who art infinitely good and amiable.
What is man, exclaims holy Job, that thou shouldst magnify him for why dost thou set the heart upon him? (Job 7:17)
What good, O Lord! hast Thou ever derived from me? and what canst Thou expect from me, that Thou lovest me so much, and comest so near to me? Hast Thou then forgotten all the injuries and treasons which I have committed against Thee? But since Thou hast so much loved me, I, a miserable worm, must also love Thee, my Creator and my Redeemer. Yes, I do love Thee, my God ; I love Thee with my whole heart, I love Thee more than myself, and because I love Thee I will do everything to please Thee. — Thou knowest that nothing is so grievous to me as the remembrance of my having so often despised Thy love. I hope for the future to be able to compensate by my love for the frequent displeasure which I have given Thee. Help me for the sake of that precious blood which Thou hast shed for me. Help me also, O holy Mary ! for the love of thy Son who died for me.
Tuesday
The Moment of Death
"O moment, on which depends eternity!" — Oh! how much depends on the last moment of our lives, on our last breath! Either an eternity of delights, or an eternity of torments, a life of happiness, or a life of misery. What folly therefore must it be, for the sake of a wretched momentary pleasure in this life, to run the risk of making an evil end, and beginning a life of misery which will never terminate!
O God! what will become of me in the last moment of my life? O Jesus, who didst die for my salvation! suffer me not to be lost forever; suffer me not to lose Thee, my only good.
O God! how do those miserable criminals who are condemned to cast lots for their lives tremble when they throw the dice, upon the cast of which depends their life or death! Tell me, Christian, if you were in such a situation, how much you would give to be liberated from it? But faith teaches you that you will one day arrive at that last moment, on which will depend your eternal life or death. You will then say, "Alas! I must now be either happy forever with God, or in despair forever without him."
No, my God, I will not lose Thee; if I have hitherto forfeited Thy friendship, I am sorry for it, and sincerely repent of it; I will never lose Thee more.
Either we believe, or we do not believe. — And if we believe that there is an eternity, that we can die only once, and that if we die ill, the consequences will be eternal, without the least hope of remedy; why do we not resolve to separate ourselves from all danger of being lost, and to use all the means in our power to secure for ourselves a happy death? No security can be too great when eternity is at slake. The days of our lives are so many favors from God, by which he allows us time to prepare our accounts against the arrival of death. Delay not, for you have no lime to lose.
Behold me, O God! tell me what I must do to be saved, for I will do all that Thou requirest of me. I have turned my back upon Thee; and for this I am exceedingly sorry, and for having done so would willingly die of grief. Pardon me, O Lord! and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more. I love Thee above all things, and will never more cease to love Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, obtain for me the grace of perseverance in virtue.
O God! what will become of me in the last moment of my life? O Jesus, who didst die for my salvation! suffer me not to be lost forever; suffer me not to lose Thee, my only good.
O God! how do those miserable criminals who are condemned to cast lots for their lives tremble when they throw the dice, upon the cast of which depends their life or death! Tell me, Christian, if you were in such a situation, how much you would give to be liberated from it? But faith teaches you that you will one day arrive at that last moment, on which will depend your eternal life or death. You will then say, "Alas! I must now be either happy forever with God, or in despair forever without him."
No, my God, I will not lose Thee; if I have hitherto forfeited Thy friendship, I am sorry for it, and sincerely repent of it; I will never lose Thee more.
Either we believe, or we do not believe. — And if we believe that there is an eternity, that we can die only once, and that if we die ill, the consequences will be eternal, without the least hope of remedy; why do we not resolve to separate ourselves from all danger of being lost, and to use all the means in our power to secure for ourselves a happy death? No security can be too great when eternity is at slake. The days of our lives are so many favors from God, by which he allows us time to prepare our accounts against the arrival of death. Delay not, for you have no lime to lose.
Behold me, O God! tell me what I must do to be saved, for I will do all that Thou requirest of me. I have turned my back upon Thee; and for this I am exceedingly sorry, and for having done so would willingly die of grief. Pardon me, O Lord! and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more. I love Thee above all things, and will never more cease to love Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, obtain for me the grace of perseverance in virtue.
Monday
The Folly of Neglecting Salvation
What doth it profit a man, saith our Lord, if he gain the world, and suffer the loss of his own soul? How many rich men, how many nobles, how many monarchs, are now in hell! What now remains to them of their riches and honors but remorse and rage, which prev upon their souls, and will continue to prey upon them for all eternity?
O my God ! enlighten me and assist me. I hope nevermore to he deprived of Thy grace. Have pity on a sinner who desires to love Thee.
How comes it, writes Salvian, that men believe in death, judgment, hell, and eternity, and yet live without fearing them? Hell is believed, and yet how many go down thither! But, 0 God ! while these truths are believed, they are not dwelt upon, and hence are so many souls lost.
Alas! I also have been of the number of those who have been guilty of such folly. Although I knew that by offending Thee I was forfeiting Thy friendship, and writing my own condemnation; yet I was not restrained from committing sin! "Cast me not away from Thy face." I am sensible of the evil I have done in despising Thee, my God, and am grieved for it with my whole soul. Oh, "cast me not away from Thy face."
And then? and then? Oh, what force had these two words with F. P. Francis Zazzera when repeated to him by St. Philip Neri, in order to induce him to renounce the world and give himself wholly to God!* Oh that they would be wise, and would understand, and would provide for their latter end. (Deuteronomy 32:29) Oh! if all persons would but think of death, in which everything must be relinquished; of judgment, in which an account must be given of our whole lives ; of a happy or miserable eternity, which must be the lot of each one : if all did but provide for these last things of their lives, no one would be lost. The present only is thought of, and hence is eternal salvation lost.
I give Thee thanks, O God, for the patience with which Thou hast hitherto borne with me, and for the light which Thou now bestowest upon me. I see that although I forgot Thee, Thou didst not forget me. I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having turned my back upon Thee, and I am now resolved to give myself entirely to Thee. And why should I delay ? That Thou mayest abandon me, and that death may find me as miserable and ungrateful as I have been even until now? No, my God, I will no more offend Thee, but will love Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! Give me perseverance and Thy holy love; I ask for nothing more. Mary, refuge of sinners, intercede for me.
* The circumstance to which St. Alphonsus here refers is thus related by him in his sermon for Septuagesima Sunday: "St. Philip Neri, speaking, one day, to a young man named Francis Zazzera, who expected to make his fortune in the world by his talents, said : 'Be of good heart, my son; you may make a great fortune, you may become an eminent lawyer, you may then be made a prelate, then perhaps a cardinal, and then, who knows, perhaps even Pope. And then? and then?' Go,' continued the Saint, 'and reflect upon these two words.' The young man went his way, and after having meditated on the two words and then? and then? abandoned all his worldly prospects, and gave himself entirely to God. Leaving the world, he entered into the same congregation that St. Philip had founded, and then he died in the odor of sanctity."
O my God ! enlighten me and assist me. I hope nevermore to he deprived of Thy grace. Have pity on a sinner who desires to love Thee.
How comes it, writes Salvian, that men believe in death, judgment, hell, and eternity, and yet live without fearing them? Hell is believed, and yet how many go down thither! But, 0 God ! while these truths are believed, they are not dwelt upon, and hence are so many souls lost.
Alas! I also have been of the number of those who have been guilty of such folly. Although I knew that by offending Thee I was forfeiting Thy friendship, and writing my own condemnation; yet I was not restrained from committing sin! "Cast me not away from Thy face." I am sensible of the evil I have done in despising Thee, my God, and am grieved for it with my whole soul. Oh, "cast me not away from Thy face."
And then? and then? Oh, what force had these two words with F. P. Francis Zazzera when repeated to him by St. Philip Neri, in order to induce him to renounce the world and give himself wholly to God!* Oh that they would be wise, and would understand, and would provide for their latter end. (Deuteronomy 32:29) Oh! if all persons would but think of death, in which everything must be relinquished; of judgment, in which an account must be given of our whole lives ; of a happy or miserable eternity, which must be the lot of each one : if all did but provide for these last things of their lives, no one would be lost. The present only is thought of, and hence is eternal salvation lost.
I give Thee thanks, O God, for the patience with which Thou hast hitherto borne with me, and for the light which Thou now bestowest upon me. I see that although I forgot Thee, Thou didst not forget me. I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having turned my back upon Thee, and I am now resolved to give myself entirely to Thee. And why should I delay ? That Thou mayest abandon me, and that death may find me as miserable and ungrateful as I have been even until now? No, my God, I will no more offend Thee, but will love Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! Give me perseverance and Thy holy love; I ask for nothing more. Mary, refuge of sinners, intercede for me.
* The circumstance to which St. Alphonsus here refers is thus related by him in his sermon for Septuagesima Sunday: "St. Philip Neri, speaking, one day, to a young man named Francis Zazzera, who expected to make his fortune in the world by his talents, said : 'Be of good heart, my son; you may make a great fortune, you may become an eminent lawyer, you may then be made a prelate, then perhaps a cardinal, and then, who knows, perhaps even Pope. And then? and then?' Go,' continued the Saint, 'and reflect upon these two words.' The young man went his way, and after having meditated on the two words and then? and then? abandoned all his worldly prospects, and gave himself entirely to God. Leaving the world, he entered into the same congregation that St. Philip had founded, and then he died in the odor of sanctity."
Sunday
Jesus, the Man of Sorrows
The prophet Isaias calls our Blessed Redeemer a man of sorrows; (Isaiah 53:3) and such he was, for his whole life was a life of sorrows. He took upon his own shoulders all our debts. It is true that as he was man and God, a single prayer from him would have been sufficient to make satisfaction for the sins of the whole world; but our Saviour would rigorously satisfy divine justice, and hence he chose for himself a life of contempt and suffering, being content for the love of man to be treated as the last and the vilest of men, as the prophet Isaias had foreseen him: We have seen Him... despised and the most abject of men (Isaiah 53:2)
O my despised Jesus! by the contempt which Thou didst endure Thou hast made satisfaction for the contempt with which I have treated Thee. Oh that I had died and had never offended Thee!
Who, my God, amongst the sons of men, was ever so afflicted and oppressed as our most loving Redeemer? Man, however much he may be afflicted in this world, enjoys from time to time relief and consolation. Thus does our compassionate God treat his ungrateful and rebellious creatures. But he would not thus treat his beloved Son; for the life of Jesus Christ in this world was not only a life of afflictions, but of continual afflictions from its commencement until death. Our Blessed Saviour was deprived of all consolation and of every kind of relief. In a word, he was born but to suffer and to be the man of sorrows.
O Jesus! how unhappy is he who does not love Thee, or who loves Thee but little, after Thou hast so loved us miserable worms who have offended Thee! Enable me from this day forward to love no other but Thee, who alone art worthy of being loved.
Again, men suffer afflictions, but it is only while they are suffering them, because they do not know those which are yet to come. But Jesus Christ, having, as God, a knowledge of all future things, suffered in every moment of his life, not only the pains which actually afflicted him, but all those also which were to come upon him, and especially the outrages of his most sorrowful Passion, having always before his eyes his scourging at the pillar, his crowning with thorns, his crucifixion and bitter death, with all the sorrows and desolation which accompanied it.
And why, O Jesus! didst Thou suffer so much for me who have so grievously offended Thee? Accept of me now that I may love Thee, and that henceforward I may love no other but Thee. My love and my only good, accept of me and strengthen me. I am resolved to become holy, that I may please Thee alone. Thou desirest me to be all Thine, and such do I desire to be. Holy Mary, thou art my hope.
O my despised Jesus! by the contempt which Thou didst endure Thou hast made satisfaction for the contempt with which I have treated Thee. Oh that I had died and had never offended Thee!
Who, my God, amongst the sons of men, was ever so afflicted and oppressed as our most loving Redeemer? Man, however much he may be afflicted in this world, enjoys from time to time relief and consolation. Thus does our compassionate God treat his ungrateful and rebellious creatures. But he would not thus treat his beloved Son; for the life of Jesus Christ in this world was not only a life of afflictions, but of continual afflictions from its commencement until death. Our Blessed Saviour was deprived of all consolation and of every kind of relief. In a word, he was born but to suffer and to be the man of sorrows.
O Jesus! how unhappy is he who does not love Thee, or who loves Thee but little, after Thou hast so loved us miserable worms who have offended Thee! Enable me from this day forward to love no other but Thee, who alone art worthy of being loved.
Again, men suffer afflictions, but it is only while they are suffering them, because they do not know those which are yet to come. But Jesus Christ, having, as God, a knowledge of all future things, suffered in every moment of his life, not only the pains which actually afflicted him, but all those also which were to come upon him, and especially the outrages of his most sorrowful Passion, having always before his eyes his scourging at the pillar, his crowning with thorns, his crucifixion and bitter death, with all the sorrows and desolation which accompanied it.
And why, O Jesus! didst Thou suffer so much for me who have so grievously offended Thee? Accept of me now that I may love Thee, and that henceforward I may love no other but Thee. My love and my only good, accept of me and strengthen me. I am resolved to become holy, that I may please Thee alone. Thou desirest me to be all Thine, and such do I desire to be. Holy Mary, thou art my hope.
Friday
The Journey to Eternity
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. (Ecclesiastes 8:5) This earth is not our true country; we are only passing through it on our way to eternity. The land in which I dwell, the house which I inhabit, are no; mine. In a short time, and when I least expect it, I must leave them. The house which will contain my body until the day of general judgment will be the grave, and the house of my soul will be eternity, in heaven if I be saved, in hell if I be lost. Foolish indeed, then, should I be were I to place my affections on things which I must soon leave. I will endeavor to procure for myself a happy mansion in which I may dwell forever.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. It is said "he shall go," to give us to understand that each one shall go, in another life, into that house which he himself has chosen: " he shall go," he shall not be conducted, but shall go thither of his own free will. — Faith teaches us that, in the next life, there are two habitations: one is a palace of delights, where all are happy forever, and this is paradise; the other is a prison of excruciating torments, where all are forever miserable, and this is hell. Choose, my soul, to which of the two thou wilt go. If thou desirest heaven, thou must walk in the way which leads to heaven ; if thou shouldst walk in the way which leads to hell, thou wilt one day unhappily find thyself there.
Jesus, enlighten me; Jesus, strengthen me. Suffer me not to be separated from Thee.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. If then I be saved and enter into the house of bliss, I shall there be happy forever; but if I be lost and enter into the house of woe, I shall be miserable forever. If, therefore, I would be saved, I must keep eternity always before my eyes. He who frequently meditates upon eternity does not become attached to the goods of this world, and thus secures his salvation. I will endeavor, therefore, so to regulate all my actions that they may be so many steps towards a happy eternity.
O God! I believe in life eternal. Henceforth I will live only for Thee; hitherto I have lived for myself and have lost Thee, my sovereign good. I will never more lose Thee; but will forever serve and love Thee. Assist me, O Jesus! and do not abandon me. Mary, my Mother, protect me.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. It is said "he shall go," to give us to understand that each one shall go, in another life, into that house which he himself has chosen: " he shall go," he shall not be conducted, but shall go thither of his own free will. — Faith teaches us that, in the next life, there are two habitations: one is a palace of delights, where all are happy forever, and this is paradise; the other is a prison of excruciating torments, where all are forever miserable, and this is hell. Choose, my soul, to which of the two thou wilt go. If thou desirest heaven, thou must walk in the way which leads to heaven ; if thou shouldst walk in the way which leads to hell, thou wilt one day unhappily find thyself there.
Jesus, enlighten me; Jesus, strengthen me. Suffer me not to be separated from Thee.
Man shall go into the house of his eternity. If then I be saved and enter into the house of bliss, I shall there be happy forever; but if I be lost and enter into the house of woe, I shall be miserable forever. If, therefore, I would be saved, I must keep eternity always before my eyes. He who frequently meditates upon eternity does not become attached to the goods of this world, and thus secures his salvation. I will endeavor, therefore, so to regulate all my actions that they may be so many steps towards a happy eternity.
O God! I believe in life eternal. Henceforth I will live only for Thee; hitherto I have lived for myself and have lost Thee, my sovereign good. I will never more lose Thee; but will forever serve and love Thee. Assist me, O Jesus! and do not abandon me. Mary, my Mother, protect me.
Wednesday
The Examination at the Particular Judgment
In the same moment and in the same place in which the soul departs from the body, the divine tribunal is erected, the indictment read, and the sentence pronounced by the sovereign judge. Whom he foreknew, says St. Paul, he also predestinated to be made conformable to his Son... them he also justified. (Romans 8:29) In order, therefore, to be made worthy of glory, our lives must be made conformable to the life of Jesus Christ. Hence it is that St. Peter says that, in the day of judgment, the just man shall scarcely be saved. (1Peter 4:18)
O Jesus, my Saviour and my judge! what will become of me, since my whole life has hitherto been the reverse of Thine? But Thy Passion is my hope. I am a sinner, but Thou canst make me a saint, and this I hope for from Thy bounty.
The Venerable Father Louis da Ponte, reflecting on the account which he should have to give of his whole life at the time of his death, trembled to such a degree as to make the whole room shake. And how ought we to tremble at the thought of this account! and how diligent ought we to be in seeking the Lord whilst we may find him! At the time of death it will be difficult to find him, if we are overtaken in our sins; but now we may easily find him by repentance and love. Seek ye the Lord, while he may be found: call upon him, while he is near. (Isaiah 55:6)
Yes, my God, I am sorry above every evil for having despised Thee; and I now esteem and love Thee above every good.
What shall I do, said holy Job, when God shall rise to judge? and when He shall examine, what shall I answer Him? (Job 31:14) And what shall I answer him, if, after so many mercies, so many calls, still I resist him?
No, Lord, I will no longer resist Thee, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. I have committed many offences and disloyalties against Thee, but Thou hast shed Thy blood to save me from my sins. "Help Thy servant whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood." (Ecclesiastes 12:5) I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart ; have pity on me. And O Mary, my Mother, do not abandon me!
O Jesus, my Saviour and my judge! what will become of me, since my whole life has hitherto been the reverse of Thine? But Thy Passion is my hope. I am a sinner, but Thou canst make me a saint, and this I hope for from Thy bounty.
The Venerable Father Louis da Ponte, reflecting on the account which he should have to give of his whole life at the time of his death, trembled to such a degree as to make the whole room shake. And how ought we to tremble at the thought of this account! and how diligent ought we to be in seeking the Lord whilst we may find him! At the time of death it will be difficult to find him, if we are overtaken in our sins; but now we may easily find him by repentance and love. Seek ye the Lord, while he may be found: call upon him, while he is near. (Isaiah 55:6)
Yes, my God, I am sorry above every evil for having despised Thee; and I now esteem and love Thee above every good.
What shall I do, said holy Job, when God shall rise to judge? and when He shall examine, what shall I answer Him? (Job 31:14) And what shall I answer him, if, after so many mercies, so many calls, still I resist him?
No, Lord, I will no longer resist Thee, I will no longer be ungrateful to Thee. I have committed many offences and disloyalties against Thee, but Thou hast shed Thy blood to save me from my sins. "Help Thy servant whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood." (Ecclesiastes 12:5) I am sorry, my sovereign good, for having offended Thee, and I love Thee with my whole heart ; have pity on me. And O Mary, my Mother, do not abandon me!
Monday
God Abandons the Sinner in his Sins
It is a grievous chastisement of God, when he cuts the sinner off in his sins; but still worse is that whereby he abandons him and suffers him to add sin upon sin. "No punishment is so great," says Bellarmin, "as when sin is made the punishment of sin."
I give Thee thanks, therefore, O Jesus! for not having suffered me to die in my sins; and I give Thee still greater thanks for not having abandoned me in my sins. And oh! into how much deeper an abyss of sin should I have fallen if Thou hadst not supported me. Continue, O Lord! to keep me from sin and do not forsake me.
I will take away the hedge thereof, and it shall be wasted. (Isaiah 5:5) When the master cuts down the fence of his vineyard, and leaves it open for any one to enter therein, it is a sign that he considers it not worth cultivating, and abandons it. In like manner does God proceed when he forsakes a sinful soul: he takes away from it the hedge of his holy fear, of his light, and of his voice; and hence the soul being blinded and enslaved by its vices, which overpower it, despises everything, the grace of God, heaven, admonitions, and censures; it thinks lightly even of its own damnation, and thus enveloped in darkness is certain to be lost forever. The wicked man, when he is come into the depths of sins, contemneth* (Proverbs 18:3)
This have I deserved, O God! for having so often despised Thy light and Thy calls. But I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me. I love Thee, O my God! and in Thee do I place all my hopes.
We would have cured Babylon, but she is not healed; let us forsake her. (Jeremiah 51:9) The physician visits the sick man, prescribes remedies for him, and makes him sensible of his maladies; but when he sees that his patient does not obey him, and on this account grows worse and worse, he takes leave of him and forsakes him. It is thus that God deals with obstinate sinners: after a certain time he speaks but little to them; and only assists them with grace just sufficient to enable them to save their souls; but they will not save them. The darkness of their minds, the hardness of their hearts, and the inveteracy of their wicked habits, render it morally impossible for them to gain salvation.
But, O God! since Thou still callest me to repentance, Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I desire never more to forsake Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee I am exceedingly sorry for having offended Thee. I love Thee, and I hope through Thy blood to love Thee forever. Suffer me not to be any more separated from Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, become my advocate.
*treat or regard with contempt.
I give Thee thanks, therefore, O Jesus! for not having suffered me to die in my sins; and I give Thee still greater thanks for not having abandoned me in my sins. And oh! into how much deeper an abyss of sin should I have fallen if Thou hadst not supported me. Continue, O Lord! to keep me from sin and do not forsake me.
I will take away the hedge thereof, and it shall be wasted. (Isaiah 5:5) When the master cuts down the fence of his vineyard, and leaves it open for any one to enter therein, it is a sign that he considers it not worth cultivating, and abandons it. In like manner does God proceed when he forsakes a sinful soul: he takes away from it the hedge of his holy fear, of his light, and of his voice; and hence the soul being blinded and enslaved by its vices, which overpower it, despises everything, the grace of God, heaven, admonitions, and censures; it thinks lightly even of its own damnation, and thus enveloped in darkness is certain to be lost forever. The wicked man, when he is come into the depths of sins, contemneth* (Proverbs 18:3)
This have I deserved, O God! for having so often despised Thy light and Thy calls. But I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me. I love Thee, O my God! and in Thee do I place all my hopes.
We would have cured Babylon, but she is not healed; let us forsake her. (Jeremiah 51:9) The physician visits the sick man, prescribes remedies for him, and makes him sensible of his maladies; but when he sees that his patient does not obey him, and on this account grows worse and worse, he takes leave of him and forsakes him. It is thus that God deals with obstinate sinners: after a certain time he speaks but little to them; and only assists them with grace just sufficient to enable them to save their souls; but they will not save them. The darkness of their minds, the hardness of their hearts, and the inveteracy of their wicked habits, render it morally impossible for them to gain salvation.
But, O God! since Thou still callest me to repentance, Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I desire never more to forsake Thee. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee I am exceedingly sorry for having offended Thee. I love Thee, and I hope through Thy blood to love Thee forever. Suffer me not to be any more separated from Thee. Holy Mary, Virgin of virgins, become my advocate.
*treat or regard with contempt.
Saturday
The Near Approach of Death
Every one knows that he must certainly die; yet many delude themselves by imagining that death is at so immense a distance from them that it will scarcely ever reach them. No; our life is indeed short, and death is very near us. The days of our sojourning here are few, and perhaps much fewer than we imagine. What else is our life but a light vapor, which is driven away and disappears with the wind? a blade of grass which is dried up in the heat of the sun?
O God ! Thou wouldst not suffer death to overtake me when I was under Thy displeasure, because Thou didst love me and didst desire my salvation; wherefore I will also love Thee.
My days, said holy Job, have been swifter than a post. (Job 9:25) Death is hasting towards us more rapidly than a post, and we at every step, and every breath and moment, are drawing nearer and nearer to death. At the time of our death how shall we wish for one day or one hour of the many we now squander away to no purpose !
Ah! Lord, if death were now announced to me, what should I find that I have done for Thee? Alas! come to my assistance; let me not die ungrateful to Thee as I hitherto have been. Grant me true sorrow for my sins, the gift of Thy love, and holy perseverance.
Death hastens towards us; wherefore we must also hasten to do that which is good, and to put our accounts in order against the day of its arrival. When death comes it precludes all remedies for what has been done amiss. How many are now in hell who thought of amending their lives at some future period, but were prevented by death and consigned to eternal torments!
My dear Redeemer, I will no longer resist Thy calls. Thou offerest me pardon, and I am desirous of obtaining it; I pray for it, and hope for it, through that death which Thou, my Jesus, hast suffered that Thou mayest be able to impart it to me. I am sorry, O infinite goodness, for having offended Thee. Thou, my Jesus, hast died for me, and I have postponed Thy friendship to my own wretched inclinations. For the future I hope with Thy assistance always to love Thee. I love Thee, O God ! I love Thee. Thou art now and shalt be forever my only good, my only love. Mary, mother of God, watch over me and take pity on me.
O God ! Thou wouldst not suffer death to overtake me when I was under Thy displeasure, because Thou didst love me and didst desire my salvation; wherefore I will also love Thee.
My days, said holy Job, have been swifter than a post. (Job 9:25) Death is hasting towards us more rapidly than a post, and we at every step, and every breath and moment, are drawing nearer and nearer to death. At the time of our death how shall we wish for one day or one hour of the many we now squander away to no purpose !
Ah! Lord, if death were now announced to me, what should I find that I have done for Thee? Alas! come to my assistance; let me not die ungrateful to Thee as I hitherto have been. Grant me true sorrow for my sins, the gift of Thy love, and holy perseverance.
Death hastens towards us; wherefore we must also hasten to do that which is good, and to put our accounts in order against the day of its arrival. When death comes it precludes all remedies for what has been done amiss. How many are now in hell who thought of amending their lives at some future period, but were prevented by death and consigned to eternal torments!
My dear Redeemer, I will no longer resist Thy calls. Thou offerest me pardon, and I am desirous of obtaining it; I pray for it, and hope for it, through that death which Thou, my Jesus, hast suffered that Thou mayest be able to impart it to me. I am sorry, O infinite goodness, for having offended Thee. Thou, my Jesus, hast died for me, and I have postponed Thy friendship to my own wretched inclinations. For the future I hope with Thy assistance always to love Thee. I love Thee, O God ! I love Thee. Thou art now and shalt be forever my only good, my only love. Mary, mother of God, watch over me and take pity on me.
Thursday
The Will of God to Save All
The Apostle St. Paul teaches us that God willeth the salvation of all: He will have all men to be saved; (Timothy 2:4) and St. Peter saith: the Lord dealeth patiently for your sake, not milling that any should perish, but that all should return to penance. (Peter 3:9) For this end the Son of God came down from heaven, and was made man, and spent thirty-three years in labors and sufferings, and finally shed his blood and laid down his life for our salvation; and shall we forfeit our salvation?
Thou, my Saviour, didst spend Thy whole life in securing my salvation, and in what have I spent so many years of my life ? What fruit hast Thou hitherto reaped from me? I have deserved to be cut off and cast into hell. But Thou desirest not the death of the sinner, but that he be converted and live." Yes, O God! I leave all and turn myself to Thee. I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee. Accept of me, and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more.
How much did the saints do to secure their eternal salvation! How many nobles and kings have forsaken their kingdoms and estates, and shut themselves up in cloisters ! How many young persons have forsaken their country and friends, and have dwelt in caves and deserts ! And how many martyrs have laid down their lives under the most cruel tortures! And why? — to save their souls. And what have we done?
Woe to me, who, although I know that death is near at hand, yet think not of it ! No, my God, I will no longer live at a distance from Thee. Why do I delay? Is it that death may overtake me in the miserable state in which I now am? No, my God, do Thou assist me to prepare for death.
O God, how many graces has my Saviour bestowed on me to enable me to save my soul ! He has caused me to be born in the bosom of the true Church; he has many times pardoned me my transgressions; he has favored me with many lights in sermons, in prayers, in meditations, in Communions, and spiritual exercises; and often has he called me to his love. In a word, how many means of salvation has he granted me which he has not granted others!
And yet, O God! when shall I detach myself from the world and give myself entirely to Thee ? Behold me, O Jesus! I will no longer resist. Thou hast obliged me to love Thee. I desire to be wholly Thine: do Thou accept of me, and disdain not the love of a sinner who has hitherto so much despised Thee. I love Thee, my God, my love, and my all; have pity on me, O Mary! —thou art my hope.
Thou, my Saviour, didst spend Thy whole life in securing my salvation, and in what have I spent so many years of my life ? What fruit hast Thou hitherto reaped from me? I have deserved to be cut off and cast into hell. But Thou desirest not the death of the sinner, but that he be converted and live." Yes, O God! I leave all and turn myself to Thee. I love Thee, and because I love Thee I am sorry for having offended Thee. Accept of me, and suffer me not to forsake Thee any more.
How much did the saints do to secure their eternal salvation! How many nobles and kings have forsaken their kingdoms and estates, and shut themselves up in cloisters ! How many young persons have forsaken their country and friends, and have dwelt in caves and deserts ! And how many martyrs have laid down their lives under the most cruel tortures! And why? — to save their souls. And what have we done?
Woe to me, who, although I know that death is near at hand, yet think not of it ! No, my God, I will no longer live at a distance from Thee. Why do I delay? Is it that death may overtake me in the miserable state in which I now am? No, my God, do Thou assist me to prepare for death.
O God, how many graces has my Saviour bestowed on me to enable me to save my soul ! He has caused me to be born in the bosom of the true Church; he has many times pardoned me my transgressions; he has favored me with many lights in sermons, in prayers, in meditations, in Communions, and spiritual exercises; and often has he called me to his love. In a word, how many means of salvation has he granted me which he has not granted others!
And yet, O God! when shall I detach myself from the world and give myself entirely to Thee ? Behold me, O Jesus! I will no longer resist. Thou hast obliged me to love Thee. I desire to be wholly Thine: do Thou accept of me, and disdain not the love of a sinner who has hitherto so much despised Thee. I love Thee, my God, my love, and my all; have pity on me, O Mary! —thou art my hope.
Wednesday
The Love of Jesus Crucified
Well might our loving Redeemer declare that he came upon the earth to enkindle divine love, and that he desired nothing else but to see this sacred fire burning in our hearts: I am come to cast fire upon the earth: and what will I but that it be kindled? (Luke 12:49) And, in fact, how many happy souls have been so inflamed with the thoughts of a crucified God as to forsake all things else to give themselves entirely to his holy love! What more could Jesus Christ have done to induce us to love him than to die in torments upon a cross to prove how much he loved us ? With good reason did St. Francis of Paula, when he contemplated with admiration Jesus crucified, exclaim in an ecstasy of love, " O charity! charity! charity!"
But alas, how generally do men live forgetful of so loving a God ! If the vilest of men—if a slave had done for me what Jesus Christ has done and suffered for me, how should I be able to live without loving him ? 0 God ! who is he that hangs upon the cross?—the same that created me and that now dies for me. That cross, those thorns, those nails, exclaim, and with a still louder voice those wounds cry out and demand our love.
"May I die," said St. Francis of Assisi, "for the love of Thy love, O Jesus! who hast died for the love of my love." To make an adequate return for the love of God in dying for us would require another God to die for him. It would be but little, it would be nothing, were each of us to give a thousand lives in return for the love of Jesus Christ. But Jesus is satisfied with our giving him our hearts; nevertheless he is not satisfied unless we give them entirely to him. For this end, says the Apostle, did he die, that he might have the entire dominion of our hearts: That He might be Lord both of the dead and of the living? (Romans 14:9)
My beloved Redeemer, how can I ever more forget Thee? how can I love anything else, after having seen Thee die in torments on an infamous gibbet to satisfy for my sins? and how can I reflect that my sins have reduced Thee to this, and not die with grief at the remembrance of the offences I have committed against Thee? Jesus, help me; I desire nothing but Thee; help me and love me. O Mary, my hope! assist me by thy prayers.
But alas, how generally do men live forgetful of so loving a God ! If the vilest of men—if a slave had done for me what Jesus Christ has done and suffered for me, how should I be able to live without loving him ? 0 God ! who is he that hangs upon the cross?—the same that created me and that now dies for me. That cross, those thorns, those nails, exclaim, and with a still louder voice those wounds cry out and demand our love.
"May I die," said St. Francis of Assisi, "for the love of Thy love, O Jesus! who hast died for the love of my love." To make an adequate return for the love of God in dying for us would require another God to die for him. It would be but little, it would be nothing, were each of us to give a thousand lives in return for the love of Jesus Christ. But Jesus is satisfied with our giving him our hearts; nevertheless he is not satisfied unless we give them entirely to him. For this end, says the Apostle, did he die, that he might have the entire dominion of our hearts: That He might be Lord both of the dead and of the living? (Romans 14:9)
My beloved Redeemer, how can I ever more forget Thee? how can I love anything else, after having seen Thee die in torments on an infamous gibbet to satisfy for my sins? and how can I reflect that my sins have reduced Thee to this, and not die with grief at the remembrance of the offences I have committed against Thee? Jesus, help me; I desire nothing but Thee; help me and love me. O Mary, my hope! assist me by thy prayers.
Tuesday
The Unhappy Life of the Sinner
There is no peace for the wicked. (Isaiah 48:22) The devil deceives poor sinners by making them believe that if they gratify their sensual desires, revenge themselves, or take what belongs to another, they will gain satisfaction and obtain peace: but no, for the reverse will always be their portion; the soul after sin becomes more than ever disquieted and afflicted. The brutes alone, who are created for the earth, can gain contentment from the enjoyments of the earth; but man, who is created to enjoy God, cannot derive satisfaction from any or all of God's creatures; his only source of happiness is God.
O my God ! what, of all the delights by which I have offended Thee, now remains but bitterness and sorrow to torment me? I do not regret the bitterness which they now cause me; but only the displeasure which they have given Thee, who hast so much loved me.
The wicked are like the raging sea, which cannot rest. (Isaiah 57:20) What is a soul in disgrace with God but a tempestuous sea, always in agitation? — one wave rises and another succeeds, and all are waves of pain and anguish. No one in the world can have all things according to his will. He who loves God, when adversity comes resigns himself to God's blessed will, and thus secures peace to his soul; but how can the sinner, if he is an enemy of God, pacify himself by resignation to God's holy appointments ? Besides, sin always brings with it the dread of divine vengeance. The wicked man fleeth, when no man pursueth. (Proverbs 28:1) Yes, for his own sin followeth after him, and by the remorse with which it preys upon his soul, makes him suffer an anticipated hell.
O my Lord and my God ! I am exceedingly sorry for having forsaken Thee; do Thou forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more.
Delight in the Lord, and He will give thee the requests of thy heart. (Psalm 36:4) Man, whither goest thou in search of content? Seek after God, and he will satisfy all the desires of thy soul. " Seek," says St. Augustine, "the one only good, in whom are all other goods." Behold a St. Francis, who when stripped of all worldly goods, being still united with God, found in this a heaven even here upon earth, and could not often enough exclaim, "My God ! my God and my all!"' Happy the soul that leaves all for God, for in him it finds all.
O Jesus! instead of abandoning me, as I have deserved, Thou offerest me pardon, and callest me to Thy love. Behold, I return to Thee overwhelmed with sorrow for the evil which I have done, and deeply affected at seeing that even still Thou lovest me after the many offences I have committed against Thee. Thou lovest me, and I also love Thee and love Thee more than myself. Receive me into Thy favor, and do with me whaf Thou pleasest; only do not deprive me of Thy love Mary, Mother, have pity on me.
O my God ! what, of all the delights by which I have offended Thee, now remains but bitterness and sorrow to torment me? I do not regret the bitterness which they now cause me; but only the displeasure which they have given Thee, who hast so much loved me.
The wicked are like the raging sea, which cannot rest. (Isaiah 57:20) What is a soul in disgrace with God but a tempestuous sea, always in agitation? — one wave rises and another succeeds, and all are waves of pain and anguish. No one in the world can have all things according to his will. He who loves God, when adversity comes resigns himself to God's blessed will, and thus secures peace to his soul; but how can the sinner, if he is an enemy of God, pacify himself by resignation to God's holy appointments ? Besides, sin always brings with it the dread of divine vengeance. The wicked man fleeth, when no man pursueth. (Proverbs 28:1) Yes, for his own sin followeth after him, and by the remorse with which it preys upon his soul, makes him suffer an anticipated hell.
O my Lord and my God ! I am exceedingly sorry for having forsaken Thee; do Thou forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more.
Delight in the Lord, and He will give thee the requests of thy heart. (Psalm 36:4) Man, whither goest thou in search of content? Seek after God, and he will satisfy all the desires of thy soul. " Seek," says St. Augustine, "the one only good, in whom are all other goods." Behold a St. Francis, who when stripped of all worldly goods, being still united with God, found in this a heaven even here upon earth, and could not often enough exclaim, "My God ! my God and my all!"' Happy the soul that leaves all for God, for in him it finds all.
O Jesus! instead of abandoning me, as I have deserved, Thou offerest me pardon, and callest me to Thy love. Behold, I return to Thee overwhelmed with sorrow for the evil which I have done, and deeply affected at seeing that even still Thou lovest me after the many offences I have committed against Thee. Thou lovest me, and I also love Thee and love Thee more than myself. Receive me into Thy favor, and do with me whaf Thou pleasest; only do not deprive me of Thy love Mary, Mother, have pity on me.
Monday
The Soul's Appearance at the Tribunal of God
When criminals are presented before their judges, though they fear and tremble, yet flatter themselves that either their crimes will not be proved against them, or that their judges will remit in part the punishments which they have deserved. O God! how great will be the horror of a guilty soul when presented before Jesus Christ, from whom nothing will be hidden, and who will judge it with the utmost severity! I am the Judge and the Witness, (Jeremiah 29:23) will he then say: "I am thy Judge, and I am witness of all the offences thou hast committed against me."
O my Jesus ! I deserved to hear this from Thy mouth, had the hour of my judgment arrived. But now Thou art pleased to assure me, that if I will repent of my sins, Thou wilt no longer remember them: I will not remember all his iniquities? (Ezekiel 18:22)
It is the opinion of divines, that in the same place in which the soul is separated from the body it will be judged, and its lot decided either for eternal life or eternal death. But should the soul unhappily depart from the body in sin, what will it be able to say when Jesus Christ reminds it of his abused mercies, of the years he granted it, of the calls by which he invited it, and of the many other means which he afforded it of securing its salvation ?
Jesus, my Redeemer! Thou who condemnest obstinate sinners, dost not condemn those who love Thee and who are sorry for having offended Thee. I am a sinner, but I love Thee more than myself, and I am sorry above every evil for having displeased Thee; oh, do Thou pardon me before the time comes when Thou wilt judge me!
At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
When, therefore, O my Jesus and my Judge! Thou shalt judge me, after my death, Thy wounds will be a terror to me, reproaching me with my ingratitude for the love which Thou hast shown me in suffering and dying for me, but now they encourage me and give me confidence to hope for pardon from Thee, my Redeemer who for the love of me, and that Thou mayest not have to condemn me, didst suffer Thyself to be tormented and crucified. We therefore pray Thee, help Thy servants whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood. O my Jesus ! have pity on me, who am one of those sheep for whom Thou didst shed Thy sacred blood. If hitherto I have despised Thee, I now esteem and love Thee above all things. Make known to me the means by which I may be saved, and strengthen me to fulfil Thy holy will. I will no longer abuse Thy goodness. Thou hast placed me under too many obligations to Thee; I will no longer suffer myself to live at a distance from Thee and deprived of Thy love. Mary, Mother of mercy, have compassion on me.
O my Jesus ! I deserved to hear this from Thy mouth, had the hour of my judgment arrived. But now Thou art pleased to assure me, that if I will repent of my sins, Thou wilt no longer remember them: I will not remember all his iniquities? (Ezekiel 18:22)
It is the opinion of divines, that in the same place in which the soul is separated from the body it will be judged, and its lot decided either for eternal life or eternal death. But should the soul unhappily depart from the body in sin, what will it be able to say when Jesus Christ reminds it of his abused mercies, of the years he granted it, of the calls by which he invited it, and of the many other means which he afforded it of securing its salvation ?
Jesus, my Redeemer! Thou who condemnest obstinate sinners, dost not condemn those who love Thee and who are sorry for having offended Thee. I am a sinner, but I love Thee more than myself, and I am sorry above every evil for having displeased Thee; oh, do Thou pardon me before the time comes when Thou wilt judge me!
At what hour you think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
When, therefore, O my Jesus and my Judge! Thou shalt judge me, after my death, Thy wounds will be a terror to me, reproaching me with my ingratitude for the love which Thou hast shown me in suffering and dying for me, but now they encourage me and give me confidence to hope for pardon from Thee, my Redeemer who for the love of me, and that Thou mayest not have to condemn me, didst suffer Thyself to be tormented and crucified. We therefore pray Thee, help Thy servants whom Thou hast redeemed with Thy precious blood. O my Jesus ! have pity on me, who am one of those sheep for whom Thou didst shed Thy sacred blood. If hitherto I have despised Thee, I now esteem and love Thee above all things. Make known to me the means by which I may be saved, and strengthen me to fulfil Thy holy will. I will no longer abuse Thy goodness. Thou hast placed me under too many obligations to Thee; I will no longer suffer myself to live at a distance from Thee and deprived of Thy love. Mary, Mother of mercy, have compassion on me.
Thursday
The Mercy of God in Calling Sinners to Repentance
The Lord called to Adam, and said to him. Where art thou! (Genesis 3:9) These are the words of a father, says a pious author, going in quest of his lost son. Oh the immense compassion of our God ! Adam sins, he turns his back upon God; and yet God does not abandon him, but follows him and calls after him, " Adam, where art thou ?" Thus, my soul, has God frequently done towards thee; thou hadst forsaken him by sin; but he did not hesitate to approach thee, and to call upon thee by many interior lights, by remorse of conscience, and by his holy inspirations; all of which were the effects of his compassion and love.
O God of mercy, O God of love! how could I have so grievously offended Thee, how could I have been so ungrateful to Thee!
As a father when he beholds his son hastening to cast himself down from the brink of a precipice, presses forward towards him, and with tears endeavors M withhold him from destruction; so, my God, hast Thou done towards me. I was already hastening by my sins to precipitate myself into hell, and Thou didst hold me back. I am now sensible, O Lord! of the love which Thou hast shown me, and I hope to sing forever in heaven the praises of Thy mercy: The mercies of the Lord I will sing forever. (Psalm 88:2) I know, O Jesus! that Thou desirest my salvation; but I do not know whether Thou hast yet pardoned me. Oh ! give me intense sorrow for my sins, give me an ardent love for Thee, as signs of Thy merciful forgiveness.
O my Saviour! how can I doubt of receiving Thy pardon, when Thou Thyself dost offer it to me, and art ready to receive me with open arms on my return to Thee? Wherefore I do return to Thee, sorrowing and overpowered at the consideration that after all my offences against Thee, Thou indeed still lovest me. Oh that I had never displeased Thee, my sovereign good ! how much am I grieved for having done so ! Pardon me O Jesus ! I will never more offend Thee. But I shall not be able to rest satisfied with Thy forgiveness only: give me also a great love for Thee. Having so often deserved to burn in the fire of hell, I now desire to burn in the fire of Thy holy love. I love Thee, who art my only love, my life, my treasure, my all. O Mary, my protectress! pray for me, that I may continue faithful to God until the end of my life.
O God of mercy, O God of love! how could I have so grievously offended Thee, how could I have been so ungrateful to Thee!
As a father when he beholds his son hastening to cast himself down from the brink of a precipice, presses forward towards him, and with tears endeavors M withhold him from destruction; so, my God, hast Thou done towards me. I was already hastening by my sins to precipitate myself into hell, and Thou didst hold me back. I am now sensible, O Lord! of the love which Thou hast shown me, and I hope to sing forever in heaven the praises of Thy mercy: The mercies of the Lord I will sing forever. (Psalm 88:2) I know, O Jesus! that Thou desirest my salvation; but I do not know whether Thou hast yet pardoned me. Oh ! give me intense sorrow for my sins, give me an ardent love for Thee, as signs of Thy merciful forgiveness.
O my Saviour! how can I doubt of receiving Thy pardon, when Thou Thyself dost offer it to me, and art ready to receive me with open arms on my return to Thee? Wherefore I do return to Thee, sorrowing and overpowered at the consideration that after all my offences against Thee, Thou indeed still lovest me. Oh that I had never displeased Thee, my sovereign good ! how much am I grieved for having done so ! Pardon me O Jesus ! I will never more offend Thee. But I shall not be able to rest satisfied with Thy forgiveness only: give me also a great love for Thee. Having so often deserved to burn in the fire of hell, I now desire to burn in the fire of Thy holy love. I love Thee, who art my only love, my life, my treasure, my all. O Mary, my protectress! pray for me, that I may continue faithful to God until the end of my life.
Tuesday
The Turning away from God by Sin
St. Augustine and St. Thomas define mortal sin to be a turning away from God: that is, the turning of one's back upon God, leaving the Creator for the sake of the creature. What punishment would that subject deserve who, while his king was giving him a command, contemptuously turned his back upon him to go and transgress his orders? This is what the sinner does; and this is punished in hell with the pain of loss, that is, the loss of God, a punishment richly deserved by him who in this life turns his back upon his sovereign good.
Alas! my God, I have frequently turned my back upon Thee; but I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I see that Thou approachest me, and inviting me to repentance, dost offer me Thy pardon. I am sorry above every evil for having offended Thee, do Thou have pity on me.
Thou hast forsaken Me, saith the Lord, thou hast gom backward. (Jeremiah 15:6) God complains and says, Ungrateful soul, thou hast forsaken me! I should never have forsaken thee hadst thou not first turned thy back upon me: thou hast gone backward. O God, with what consternation will these words fill the soul of the sinner when he stands to be judged before Thy divine tribunal!
Thou makest me hear them now, O my Saviour! not to condemn me, but to bring me to sorrow for the offences I have committed against Thee. Yes, O Jesus! I sincerely repent of all the displeasure which I have given Thee. For my own miserable gratifications I have forsaken Thee, my God, my sovereign, infinite good! But behold me a penitent returned to Thee; and reject me not.
Why will you die, O house of Israel? return ye and live. (Ezekial 18:31) I have died, says Jesus Christ, for the salvation of your souls, and why will you condemn them by your sins to eternal death? Return to me, and you will recover the life of my grace.
O Jesus! I should not dare to crave Thy pardon, did I not know that Thou hast died to obtain my forgiveness. Alas! how often have I despised Thy grace and Thy love! O that I had died rather than ever offered Thee so great an injury ! But Thou, who didst come near to me even when I offended Thee, wilt not now reject me, when I love Thee and seek no other but Thee. My God and my all, suffer me not any more to be ungrateful to Thee. Mary, Queen and Mother, obtain for me the grace of holy perseverance.
Alas! my God, I have frequently turned my back upon Thee; but I see that Thou hast not yet abandoned me; I see that Thou approachest me, and inviting me to repentance, dost offer me Thy pardon. I am sorry above every evil for having offended Thee, do Thou have pity on me.
Thou hast forsaken Me, saith the Lord, thou hast gom backward. (Jeremiah 15:6) God complains and says, Ungrateful soul, thou hast forsaken me! I should never have forsaken thee hadst thou not first turned thy back upon me: thou hast gone backward. O God, with what consternation will these words fill the soul of the sinner when he stands to be judged before Thy divine tribunal!
Thou makest me hear them now, O my Saviour! not to condemn me, but to bring me to sorrow for the offences I have committed against Thee. Yes, O Jesus! I sincerely repent of all the displeasure which I have given Thee. For my own miserable gratifications I have forsaken Thee, my God, my sovereign, infinite good! But behold me a penitent returned to Thee; and reject me not.
Why will you die, O house of Israel? return ye and live. (Ezekial 18:31) I have died, says Jesus Christ, for the salvation of your souls, and why will you condemn them by your sins to eternal death? Return to me, and you will recover the life of my grace.
O Jesus! I should not dare to crave Thy pardon, did I not know that Thou hast died to obtain my forgiveness. Alas! how often have I despised Thy grace and Thy love! O that I had died rather than ever offered Thee so great an injury ! But Thou, who didst come near to me even when I offended Thee, wilt not now reject me, when I love Thee and seek no other but Thee. My God and my all, suffer me not any more to be ungrateful to Thee. Mary, Queen and Mother, obtain for me the grace of holy perseverance.
Monday
The Frequent Thought of Death
Men who are attached to this world endeavor to banish the thoughts of death from their minds, as though, by avoiding the remembrance of death, they could avoid death itself. But no; by banishing the thoughts of death from their minds, they expose themselves to greater danger of making an evil end. There is no alternative: sooner or later we must die; and what is still more, we can die but once; and if once we be lost, we shall be lost forever.
My God, I give Thee thanks for having enlightened me. I have already lost too many years in offending Thee; but I will now spend the remainder of my life entirely in Thy service. Command me what Thou wiliest, for I desire to please Thee in all things.
Holy anchorets, who formerly fled from the world into deserts in order to secure for themselves a happy death, took nothing with them but some spiritual book and a skull, by the sight of which they might continually keep up in their minds the remembrance of their last end. They meditated upon it, saying: "As the bones of him to whom this skull belonged, so will the bones of my body one day be: and my soul—who knows where that shall dwell?" And thus they endeavored to gain not the goods of this life, but of that life which will never end.
I give Thee thanks, O Lord! for not having suffered me to die when I was in the state of sin. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and hope, through Thy precious blood, for mercy and pardon. I desire, O Jesus! to renounce all things, and to do my utmost to please Thee.
A certain hermit, being at the point of death, was observed to smile, and being asked why he was so cheerful, answered: "I have always kept death before my eyes, and hence, now that it is come, it does not alarm me." The approach of death, therefore, is terrible to those only who have thought of nothing but of gratifying themselves during their lifetime, and have never thought of their last end; but it is not terrible to those who, by frequently thinking upon it, have learned to despise all earthly goods, and to love nothing but God.
O my Savior! I perceive that death is already drawing near to me, and as yet I have done nothing for Thee, who didst die for me. No, before death, I will, O God! love Thee, who art worthy of infinite love. I have hitherto dishonored Thee by the offences which I have committed against Thee; but I am sorry for them with mv whole heart. For the future I will honor Thee, by loving Thee to the utmost of my power. Give me light and strength to do so. Thou wouldst have me be wholly Thine, and such do I desire to be. Help me by Thy grace; in Thee do I confide. And in thee also do I confide, 0 Mary, my Mother, and my hope!
My God, I give Thee thanks for having enlightened me. I have already lost too many years in offending Thee; but I will now spend the remainder of my life entirely in Thy service. Command me what Thou wiliest, for I desire to please Thee in all things.
Holy anchorets, who formerly fled from the world into deserts in order to secure for themselves a happy death, took nothing with them but some spiritual book and a skull, by the sight of which they might continually keep up in their minds the remembrance of their last end. They meditated upon it, saying: "As the bones of him to whom this skull belonged, so will the bones of my body one day be: and my soul—who knows where that shall dwell?" And thus they endeavored to gain not the goods of this life, but of that life which will never end.
I give Thee thanks, O Lord! for not having suffered me to die when I was in the state of sin. I am sorry for having offended Thee, and hope, through Thy precious blood, for mercy and pardon. I desire, O Jesus! to renounce all things, and to do my utmost to please Thee.
A certain hermit, being at the point of death, was observed to smile, and being asked why he was so cheerful, answered: "I have always kept death before my eyes, and hence, now that it is come, it does not alarm me." The approach of death, therefore, is terrible to those only who have thought of nothing but of gratifying themselves during their lifetime, and have never thought of their last end; but it is not terrible to those who, by frequently thinking upon it, have learned to despise all earthly goods, and to love nothing but God.
O my Savior! I perceive that death is already drawing near to me, and as yet I have done nothing for Thee, who didst die for me. No, before death, I will, O God! love Thee, who art worthy of infinite love. I have hitherto dishonored Thee by the offences which I have committed against Thee; but I am sorry for them with mv whole heart. For the future I will honor Thee, by loving Thee to the utmost of my power. Give me light and strength to do so. Thou wouldst have me be wholly Thine, and such do I desire to be. Help me by Thy grace; in Thee do I confide. And in thee also do I confide, 0 Mary, my Mother, and my hope!
Sunday
The Great Affair of Salvation
The affair of our eternal salvation is of all affairs the most important. But how comes it that men use all diligence to succeed in the affairs of this world, leave no means untried to obtain a desirable situation, to gain a lawsuit, or to bring about a marriage, reject no counsels, neglect no measures by which to secure their object, neither eat nor sleep, and yet do nothing to gain eternal salvation, — nothing to gain it, but everything to forfeit it, as though hell, heaven, and eternity were not articles of faith, but only fables and lies?
O God! assist me by Thy divine light; suffer me not to be any longer blinded, as I hitherto have been.
If an accident happen to a house, what is not immediately done to repair it? If a jewel be lost, what is not done to recover it? The soul is lost, the grace of God is lost, and men sleep and smile1 We attend most carefully to our temporal welfare, and almost entirely neglect our eternal salvation ! We call those happy who have renounced all things for God; why then are we so much attached to earthly things?
O Jesus ! Thou hast so much desired my salvation as to shed Thy blood and lay down Thy life to secure it; and I have been so indifferent to the preservation of Thy grace as to renounce and forfeit it for mere nothing ! I am sorry, O Lord ! for having thus dishonored Thee. I will renounce all tilings to attend only to Thy love, my God, who art most worthy of all love.
The Son of God gives his life to save our souls; the devil is most diligent in his endeavors to bring them to eternal ruin: and do we take no care of them? St. Philip Neri convicts that man of the height of folly who is inattentive to the salvation of his soul. Let us arouse our faith: it is certain that, after this short life, another life awaits us, which will be either eternally happy 0r eternally miserable. God has given us to choose which we will. Before man is life and death . . . that which he shall choose shall be given him. (Ecclesiastes 15:18) Ah ! let us make such a choice now as we shall not have to repent of all eternity.
O God! make me sensible of the great wrong I have done Thee in offending Thee and renouncing Thee for the love of creatures. I am sorry with my whole heart for having despised Thee, my sovereign good; do not reject me now that I return to Thee. I love Thee above all tilings, and for the future I will lose all things rather than forfeit Thy grace. Through the love which Thou hast shown me in dying for me, succor me with Thy help, and do not abandon me. O Mary, Mother of God! be thou my advocate.
O God! assist me by Thy divine light; suffer me not to be any longer blinded, as I hitherto have been.
If an accident happen to a house, what is not immediately done to repair it? If a jewel be lost, what is not done to recover it? The soul is lost, the grace of God is lost, and men sleep and smile1 We attend most carefully to our temporal welfare, and almost entirely neglect our eternal salvation ! We call those happy who have renounced all things for God; why then are we so much attached to earthly things?
O Jesus ! Thou hast so much desired my salvation as to shed Thy blood and lay down Thy life to secure it; and I have been so indifferent to the preservation of Thy grace as to renounce and forfeit it for mere nothing ! I am sorry, O Lord ! for having thus dishonored Thee. I will renounce all tilings to attend only to Thy love, my God, who art most worthy of all love.
The Son of God gives his life to save our souls; the devil is most diligent in his endeavors to bring them to eternal ruin: and do we take no care of them? St. Philip Neri convicts that man of the height of folly who is inattentive to the salvation of his soul. Let us arouse our faith: it is certain that, after this short life, another life awaits us, which will be either eternally happy 0r eternally miserable. God has given us to choose which we will. Before man is life and death . . . that which he shall choose shall be given him. (Ecclesiastes 15:18) Ah ! let us make such a choice now as we shall not have to repent of all eternity.
O God! make me sensible of the great wrong I have done Thee in offending Thee and renouncing Thee for the love of creatures. I am sorry with my whole heart for having despised Thee, my sovereign good; do not reject me now that I return to Thee. I love Thee above all tilings, and for the future I will lose all things rather than forfeit Thy grace. Through the love which Thou hast shown me in dying for me, succor me with Thy help, and do not abandon me. O Mary, Mother of God! be thou my advocate.
Saturday
The Sacred Wounds of Jesus
St. Bonaventure says that the wounds of Jesus wound the hardest hearts and inflame the coldest souls. And in truth, how can we believe that God permitted himself to be buffeted, scourged, crowned with thorns, and finally put to death for the love of us, and yet not love him? St. Francis of Assisi frequently bewailed the ingratitude of men as he passed along the country, saying, "Love is not loved, love is not loved."
Behold, O my Jesus! I am one of those who are thus ungrateful, who have been so many years in the world and have not loved Thee. And shall I, my Redeemer, remain forever such? No, I will love Thee until death, and will give myself wholly to Thee; mercifully accept of me and help me.
The Church, when she shows us Jesus Christ crucified, exclaims: "His whole figure breathes forth love; his head bowed down, his arms extended, his side opened." She cries out: Behold, O man! behold thy God, who has died for thy love; see how his arms are extended to embrace thee, his head bowed down to give thee the kiss of peace, his side opened to give thee access to his heart, if thou wilt but love him.
Assuredly I will love Thee, my treasure, my love, and my all. And whom shall I love, if I love not God who has died for me?
The charity of Christ, saith the Apostle, presseth us. (2 Corinthians 5:14) Ah! my Redeemer, Thou hast died for the love of men; yet men do not love Thee, because they live unmindful of the death which Thou hast suffered for them. Did they bear it in mind, how could they live witliout loving Thee? "Knowing," says St. Francis de Sales, "that Jesus being really God, has so loved us as to suffer the death of the cross for us, do we not on this account feel our hearts, as it were, in a press, in which they are forcibly held, and love expressed from them by a kind of violence, which is the more powerful as it is the more amiable?" And this is what St. Paul says in these words: The charity of Christ presseth us, the love of Jesus Christ forces us to love him.
Ah! my beloved Saviour, heretofore I have despised Thee, but now I esteem and love Thee more than my own life; nothing afflicts me so much as the remembrance of the many offences I have committed against Thee. Pardon me, O Jesus ! and draw my whole heart to Thyself, that so I may not desire, nor seek, nor sigh after any other beside Thee. O Mary, my mother! help me to love Jesus.
Behold, O my Jesus! I am one of those who are thus ungrateful, who have been so many years in the world and have not loved Thee. And shall I, my Redeemer, remain forever such? No, I will love Thee until death, and will give myself wholly to Thee; mercifully accept of me and help me.
The Church, when she shows us Jesus Christ crucified, exclaims: "His whole figure breathes forth love; his head bowed down, his arms extended, his side opened." She cries out: Behold, O man! behold thy God, who has died for thy love; see how his arms are extended to embrace thee, his head bowed down to give thee the kiss of peace, his side opened to give thee access to his heart, if thou wilt but love him.
Assuredly I will love Thee, my treasure, my love, and my all. And whom shall I love, if I love not God who has died for me?
The charity of Christ, saith the Apostle, presseth us. (2 Corinthians 5:14) Ah! my Redeemer, Thou hast died for the love of men; yet men do not love Thee, because they live unmindful of the death which Thou hast suffered for them. Did they bear it in mind, how could they live witliout loving Thee? "Knowing," says St. Francis de Sales, "that Jesus being really God, has so loved us as to suffer the death of the cross for us, do we not on this account feel our hearts, as it were, in a press, in which they are forcibly held, and love expressed from them by a kind of violence, which is the more powerful as it is the more amiable?" And this is what St. Paul says in these words: The charity of Christ presseth us, the love of Jesus Christ forces us to love him.
Ah! my beloved Saviour, heretofore I have despised Thee, but now I esteem and love Thee more than my own life; nothing afflicts me so much as the remembrance of the many offences I have committed against Thee. Pardon me, O Jesus ! and draw my whole heart to Thyself, that so I may not desire, nor seek, nor sigh after any other beside Thee. O Mary, my mother! help me to love Jesus.
Thursday
The Folly of Living as Enemies of God
Sinners call the saints who, in this life, fly from honors, riches, and the pleasures of sense, and embrace poverty, contempt, and mortification, fools. But at the day of final retribution they will confess that they themselves have been fools in judging the lives of the saints to be folly: We fools esteemed their life madness? (Wisdom 5:4) And what greater folly can there be than to live without God?— which is to live a miserable life in this world, to be succeeded by a still more miserable one in hell.
No, I will not wait till the last day to confess my folly; I now confess it: how great has it been in offending Thee, my sovereign good! Father, I am not worthy to be called Thy son. (Luke 15:19) Father, I am not worthy to receive Thy forgiveness, but I hope for it through the blood which Thou hast shed for my sake. My Jesus, I am sorry for having despised Thee, I love Thee above all things.
Unhappy sinners! blinded by their sins, they lose all judgment. What would be said of a man who should sell a kingdom for the smallest coin? And what should be said of him who, for a momentary pleasure, a vapor, a caprice, sells heaven and the grace of God ? They think only of this life, which will shortly end, and in the mean time deserve hell for that life which will never end. O my God! permit me not to become any more so blind as to prefer, as I have hitherto done, my own unlawful gratifications before Thee, and for the sake of them to despise Thee, my sovereign good! I now detest them, and love Thee above all things.
Miserable worldlings! the time will come when they will bewail their folly; but when? — when there will be no longer anything to prevent their eternal ruin. Then will they say, What hath pride profited us? or what advantage hath the boasting of riches brought us? All those things are passed away like a shadow. (Wisdom 5:8) Behold, they will exclaim, how all our delights have passed away like a shadow, and nothing remains to us now but suffering and eternal lamentation!
Dear Jesus! have pity on me. I had forgotten Thee, but Thou didst not forget me. I love Thee with my whole soul, and I detest above all evil whatever sins I have committed against Thee. Pardon me, O God! and remember not my offences against Thee. And since Thou knowest my weakness, do not abandon me; give me strength to overcome all things to please Thee. O Mary, Mother of God ! in thee do I place my hopes.
No, I will not wait till the last day to confess my folly; I now confess it: how great has it been in offending Thee, my sovereign good! Father, I am not worthy to be called Thy son. (Luke 15:19) Father, I am not worthy to receive Thy forgiveness, but I hope for it through the blood which Thou hast shed for my sake. My Jesus, I am sorry for having despised Thee, I love Thee above all things.
Unhappy sinners! blinded by their sins, they lose all judgment. What would be said of a man who should sell a kingdom for the smallest coin? And what should be said of him who, for a momentary pleasure, a vapor, a caprice, sells heaven and the grace of God ? They think only of this life, which will shortly end, and in the mean time deserve hell for that life which will never end. O my God! permit me not to become any more so blind as to prefer, as I have hitherto done, my own unlawful gratifications before Thee, and for the sake of them to despise Thee, my sovereign good! I now detest them, and love Thee above all things.
Miserable worldlings! the time will come when they will bewail their folly; but when? — when there will be no longer anything to prevent their eternal ruin. Then will they say, What hath pride profited us? or what advantage hath the boasting of riches brought us? All those things are passed away like a shadow. (Wisdom 5:8) Behold, they will exclaim, how all our delights have passed away like a shadow, and nothing remains to us now but suffering and eternal lamentation!
Dear Jesus! have pity on me. I had forgotten Thee, but Thou didst not forget me. I love Thee with my whole soul, and I detest above all evil whatever sins I have committed against Thee. Pardon me, O God! and remember not my offences against Thee. And since Thou knowest my weakness, do not abandon me; give me strength to overcome all things to please Thee. O Mary, Mother of God ! in thee do I place my hopes.
Wednesday
The Number of Our Sins
It is the opinion of St. Basil, St. Jerome, St. Ambrose, St. Augustine, and others, that as God has determined for each one the number of talents, the goods of fortune, and the number of days to be bestowed upon him, so he has also determined for each one the number of sins to be pardoned him, which being completed, God will pour out his chastisements upon him and pardon him no more. Each one, says St. Augustine, is patiently borne with by Almighty God for a certain time; but when this is over, there is then no longer any more pardon for him.
I am aware, O God! that I have hitherto abused Thy patience too much; but I know that Thou hast not yet abandoned me, because I am sorry for my sins, and this sorrow is a sign that Thou still lovest me. O my God! I desire never more to displease Thee; for pity's sake do not abandon me.
The Lord patiently expecteth, that when the day of judgment shall come, He may punish them in the fulness of their sins? (2 Maccabbees 6:14) Although God has patience and waits for the sinner, yet, when the day arrives for the measure of his sins to be filled up he will wait for him no longer, but chastise him.
O Lord ! wait yet for me a little while, do not yet abandon me; I hope with the assistance of Thy grace never to offend Thee more, nor to excite Thy anger against me. I am sorry, O my sovereign good! for having offended Thee, and I protest that I will never more betray Thee. I now esteem Thy friendship more than all the goods of the whole world.
We commit sins, and we take no notice of the load of guilt which we are accumulating; but let us tremble lest what happened to King Baltassar befall us also: Thou art weighed in the balance, and art found wanting. (Daniel 5:27) The devil may tell you that it matters not whether it be ten or eleven sins. But no, that wicked enemy deceives you; the sin which he is tempting you to commit will increase the load of your guilt; it may decide the balance of divine justice against you, and you may be condemned for it to the torments of hell. If, Christian brother, you live not in fear that God will not show you mercy, should you add one more mortal sin to those which you have already committed; if you tremble not at the thought of this, you are in great danger of being lost.
No, my God: Thou hast borne with me too long; I will never more abuse Thy bountiful goodness. I thank Thee for having waited for me until now. I have forfeited Thy love too often; but I hope never more to lose Thee. Since Thou hast not yet abandoned me, enable me to find Thee again. I love Thee, O my God ! and I am sorry from the bottom of my heart for having ever turned my back upon Thee. No, I desire never more to lose Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And thou, my queen and my mother, Mary, help me by thy holy intercession.
I am aware, O God! that I have hitherto abused Thy patience too much; but I know that Thou hast not yet abandoned me, because I am sorry for my sins, and this sorrow is a sign that Thou still lovest me. O my God! I desire never more to displease Thee; for pity's sake do not abandon me.
The Lord patiently expecteth, that when the day of judgment shall come, He may punish them in the fulness of their sins? (2 Maccabbees 6:14) Although God has patience and waits for the sinner, yet, when the day arrives for the measure of his sins to be filled up he will wait for him no longer, but chastise him.
O Lord ! wait yet for me a little while, do not yet abandon me; I hope with the assistance of Thy grace never to offend Thee more, nor to excite Thy anger against me. I am sorry, O my sovereign good! for having offended Thee, and I protest that I will never more betray Thee. I now esteem Thy friendship more than all the goods of the whole world.
We commit sins, and we take no notice of the load of guilt which we are accumulating; but let us tremble lest what happened to King Baltassar befall us also: Thou art weighed in the balance, and art found wanting. (Daniel 5:27) The devil may tell you that it matters not whether it be ten or eleven sins. But no, that wicked enemy deceives you; the sin which he is tempting you to commit will increase the load of your guilt; it may decide the balance of divine justice against you, and you may be condemned for it to the torments of hell. If, Christian brother, you live not in fear that God will not show you mercy, should you add one more mortal sin to those which you have already committed; if you tremble not at the thought of this, you are in great danger of being lost.
No, my God: Thou hast borne with me too long; I will never more abuse Thy bountiful goodness. I thank Thee for having waited for me until now. I have forfeited Thy love too often; but I hope never more to lose Thee. Since Thou hast not yet abandoned me, enable me to find Thee again. I love Thee, O my God ! and I am sorry from the bottom of my heart for having ever turned my back upon Thee. No, I desire never more to lose Thee. Assist me with Thy grace. And thou, my queen and my mother, Mary, help me by thy holy intercession.
Tuesday
The Vanity of all Worldly Things
What is life but a vapor, which appears for a short time and then is seen no more? What is your life? says St. James; it is a vapor which appeareth for a little while, and afterwards shall vanish away. (James 4:15) The vapors which arise from the earth, when raised into the air and surrounded by the rays of the sun, appear brilliant and beautiful; but the least wind disperses them, and they are seen no more. Such is the grandeur of this world. Behold that prince; today, he is feared, attended upon and honored by thousands; tomorrow, he will be dead, despised and hated by all. In a word, honors, pleasures, and riches must all end in death.
O my God! make me sensible of the immensity of Thy goodness, that I may love nothing but Thee.
Death deprives man of whatever he may possess in tills world. What a sad sight, to behold a rich man, after death, carried out of his palace, to return thither no more! How sad to behold others taking possession of the estates which he has left, of his wealth, and whatever else he so lately enjoyed! His servants, after having accompanied him to his grave, abandon him, and leave him there, to be devoured by worms; no one esteeming him, no one flattering him. Formerly every one obeyed his nod, but now no one takes the least notice of his orders.
How wretched have I been, O Lord! in having, for so many years, gone after the vanities of the world, and left Thee, my sovereign good! But from this day forward I desire to possess Thee as my only treasure, as the only love of my soul.
Dust and ashes, why are you proud? (Ecclesiastes 10:9) Man, says the Almighty, seest thou not that in a short time thou wilt become dust and ashes? and on what dost thou fix thy thoughts and affections? Reflect that death will soon rob thee of everything, and separate thee from the whole world. And if, when thou givest in thy accounts, thou be found wanting, what will become of thee for eternity ?
I give Thee thanks, my Lord and my God. Thou speakest thus to me, because thou desirest to save me. Let Thy mercies now prevail. Thou hast promised to pardon such as repent of their offences against Thee. From the bottom of my heart do I repent: grant me therefore pardon. Thou hast promised to love those who love Thee: above all things do I now love Thee; wherefore do Thou love me also; and hate me not any more, as I have deserved. O Mary, my advocate, in thy protection is my hope.
O my God! make me sensible of the immensity of Thy goodness, that I may love nothing but Thee.
Death deprives man of whatever he may possess in tills world. What a sad sight, to behold a rich man, after death, carried out of his palace, to return thither no more! How sad to behold others taking possession of the estates which he has left, of his wealth, and whatever else he so lately enjoyed! His servants, after having accompanied him to his grave, abandon him, and leave him there, to be devoured by worms; no one esteeming him, no one flattering him. Formerly every one obeyed his nod, but now no one takes the least notice of his orders.
How wretched have I been, O Lord! in having, for so many years, gone after the vanities of the world, and left Thee, my sovereign good! But from this day forward I desire to possess Thee as my only treasure, as the only love of my soul.
Dust and ashes, why are you proud? (Ecclesiastes 10:9) Man, says the Almighty, seest thou not that in a short time thou wilt become dust and ashes? and on what dost thou fix thy thoughts and affections? Reflect that death will soon rob thee of everything, and separate thee from the whole world. And if, when thou givest in thy accounts, thou be found wanting, what will become of thee for eternity ?
I give Thee thanks, my Lord and my God. Thou speakest thus to me, because thou desirest to save me. Let Thy mercies now prevail. Thou hast promised to pardon such as repent of their offences against Thee. From the bottom of my heart do I repent: grant me therefore pardon. Thou hast promised to love those who love Thee: above all things do I now love Thee; wherefore do Thou love me also; and hate me not any more, as I have deserved. O Mary, my advocate, in thy protection is my hope.
Sunday
The Fire of Hell
It is certain that hell is a pit of fire, in which the miserable souls of the wicked will be tormented forever. Even in this life the pain of burning is of all pains the most intense and dreadful; but the fire of hell has the power of inflicting much more excruciating torment, because it has been created by God to be the instrument of his wrath upon his rebellious creatures. "Go, ye cursed, into everlasting fire," is the sentence of the reprobate. And as in this sentence of condemnation fire is particularly mentioned, we may conclude that, of all the torments with which the senses of the wicked are afflicted, fire is the greatest.
Ah, my God, for how many years past have I deserved to burn in this fire! But Thou hast waited for me, to behold me burning, not with this dreadful fire, but with the blessed flames of Thy holy love. Wherefore do I love Thee, my sovereign good, and desire to love Thee forever.
In this world fire burns only outwardly, and does not penetrate our interior; but in hell the fire enters into the inmost recesses of its victims. Thou shalt make them as an oven of fire. (Psalm 22:10) Every one will become as a furnace of fire, so that the heart will burn within the chest, the bowels within the carcass, the brains within the skull, and even the marrow within the bones. Sinners, what are your feelings with regard to this fire? You, who cannot now bear a spark accidentally fallen from a candle, nor a house too hot, nor a ray of the sun upon your head, how will you endure to be permanently immersed in an ocean of fire, where you will be forever dying, and yet never, never die?
O my Redeemer! let not that blood which Thou didst shed for the love of me, be shed for me in vain. Grant me sorrow for my sins, grant me Thy holy love.
Which of you, saith the prophet, can dwell with devouring fire? (Isaiah 33:14) As a wild beast devoureth his prey, so shall the fire of hell continually devour the unhappy soul, but without ever depriving him of life. Hence St. Peter Damian exclaims, "Go on, sinner, go on, unchaste one; give thy flesh its desires: a day will come when thy impurities will be to thee as pitch within thy bowels, to nourish the fire which will consume thee in hell for all eternity."
O my God, whom I have despised and lost! forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more. I am sorry above every evil for having offended Thee. Receive me into Thy favor, for now do I promise Thee that I will love Thee, and love no other but Thee. Most holy Mary, deliver me by thy holy intercession, from ever suffering the torments of hell.
Ah, my God, for how many years past have I deserved to burn in this fire! But Thou hast waited for me, to behold me burning, not with this dreadful fire, but with the blessed flames of Thy holy love. Wherefore do I love Thee, my sovereign good, and desire to love Thee forever.
In this world fire burns only outwardly, and does not penetrate our interior; but in hell the fire enters into the inmost recesses of its victims. Thou shalt make them as an oven of fire. (Psalm 22:10) Every one will become as a furnace of fire, so that the heart will burn within the chest, the bowels within the carcass, the brains within the skull, and even the marrow within the bones. Sinners, what are your feelings with regard to this fire? You, who cannot now bear a spark accidentally fallen from a candle, nor a house too hot, nor a ray of the sun upon your head, how will you endure to be permanently immersed in an ocean of fire, where you will be forever dying, and yet never, never die?
O my Redeemer! let not that blood which Thou didst shed for the love of me, be shed for me in vain. Grant me sorrow for my sins, grant me Thy holy love.
Which of you, saith the prophet, can dwell with devouring fire? (Isaiah 33:14) As a wild beast devoureth his prey, so shall the fire of hell continually devour the unhappy soul, but without ever depriving him of life. Hence St. Peter Damian exclaims, "Go on, sinner, go on, unchaste one; give thy flesh its desires: a day will come when thy impurities will be to thee as pitch within thy bowels, to nourish the fire which will consume thee in hell for all eternity."
O my God, whom I have despised and lost! forgive me, and suffer me not to lose Thee any more. I am sorry above every evil for having offended Thee. Receive me into Thy favor, for now do I promise Thee that I will love Thee, and love no other but Thee. Most holy Mary, deliver me by thy holy intercession, from ever suffering the torments of hell.
Friday
The Terrors of the Dying Man
Consider the fear which the thought of judgment will cause in the mind of a dying man, when he reflects that in a very short time he must present himself before Jesus Christ, his Judge, to render an account of all the actions of his past life. When the awful moment of his passage out of this world into another, out of time into eternity, arrives, then will there be nothing so tormenting to him as the sight of his sins. St. Mary Magdalene of Pazzi, being ill, and thinking of judgment, trembled. Her confessor told her not to fear. “Ah, Father,” she replied, “it is an awful thing to appear before Jesus Christ as our Judge.” Such were the sensations of this holy virgin, who was a saint from her infancy. What will he say who has frequently deserved hell?
The abbot Agatho after many years of penance trembled, saying, “What will become of me when I shall be judged?” And how should he not tremble who has offended God by many mortal sins, and yet has done no penance for them? At death, the sight of his crimes, the rigor of the divine judgments, the uncertainty of the sentence to be pronounced upon him, what a tempest of horror and confusion will these raise around him! Let us be careful to throw ourselves at the feet of Jesus Christ, and secure our pardon before the arrival of our accounting day.
Ah! my Jesus and my Redeemer, who wilt one day be my judge, have pity on me before the day of justice. Behold at Thy feet a deserter, who has often promised to be faithful to Thee, and has as often again turned his back upon Thee. No, my God, Thou hast not deserved the treatment which Thou hast hitherto received at my hands. Forgive me, O Lord! for I desire truly to change and amend my life. I am sorry, my sovereign good! for having despised Thee: take pity on me.
Then will be decided the great affair of our eternal salvation. Upon this decision will depend our being either saved or lost forever, our being happy or miserable for all eternity. But, O God! each one knows this, and says, “So it is.” But if it is so, why do we not leave all to attend only to our sanctification, and to the securing of our eternal salvation?
My God, I give Thee thanks for the light which Thou hast given me. Remember, O Jesus! that Thou didst die for my salvation; grant that when I first behold Thee I may see Thee appeased. If hitherto I have despised Thy grace, I now esteem it above every other good. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee, I am sorry for having offended Thee. Hitherto I have forsaken Thee, but now I desire Thee and seek Thee; grant that I may find Thee, O God of my soul! Mary, my mother, recommend me to thy Son Jesus.
The abbot Agatho after many years of penance trembled, saying, “What will become of me when I shall be judged?” And how should he not tremble who has offended God by many mortal sins, and yet has done no penance for them? At death, the sight of his crimes, the rigor of the divine judgments, the uncertainty of the sentence to be pronounced upon him, what a tempest of horror and confusion will these raise around him! Let us be careful to throw ourselves at the feet of Jesus Christ, and secure our pardon before the arrival of our accounting day.
Ah! my Jesus and my Redeemer, who wilt one day be my judge, have pity on me before the day of justice. Behold at Thy feet a deserter, who has often promised to be faithful to Thee, and has as often again turned his back upon Thee. No, my God, Thou hast not deserved the treatment which Thou hast hitherto received at my hands. Forgive me, O Lord! for I desire truly to change and amend my life. I am sorry, my sovereign good! for having despised Thee: take pity on me.
Then will be decided the great affair of our eternal salvation. Upon this decision will depend our being either saved or lost forever, our being happy or miserable for all eternity. But, O God! each one knows this, and says, “So it is.” But if it is so, why do we not leave all to attend only to our sanctification, and to the securing of our eternal salvation?
My God, I give Thee thanks for the light which Thou hast given me. Remember, O Jesus! that Thou didst die for my salvation; grant that when I first behold Thee I may see Thee appeased. If hitherto I have despised Thy grace, I now esteem it above every other good. I love Thee, O infinite goodness! and because I love Thee, I am sorry for having offended Thee. Hitherto I have forsaken Thee, but now I desire Thee and seek Thee; grant that I may find Thee, O God of my soul! Mary, my mother, recommend me to thy Son Jesus.
Sunday
The Value of Time
Time is a treasure of inestimable value, because in every moment of time we may gain an increase of grace and eternal glory. In hell the lost souls are tormented with the thought, and bitterly lament that now there is no more time for them in which to rescue themselves by repentance from eternal misery. What would they give but for one hour of time to save themselves by an act of true sorrow from destruction! In heaven there is no grief; but if the blessed could grieve, they would do so for having lost so much time during life, in which they might have acquired greater glory, and because time is ,now no longer theirs.
I give Thee thanks, O God! for giving me time to bewail my sins, and to make amends by my love for the offences I have committed against Thee.
Nothing is so precious as time; and yet how comes it that nothing is so little valued? Men will spend hours in jesting, or standing at a window or in the middle of a road, to see what passes; and if you ask them what they are doing, they will tell you they are passing away time. O time, now so much despised! thou wilt be of all things else the most valued by such persons when death shall have surprised them. What will they not then be willing to give for one hour of so much lost time! But time will remain no longer for them when it is said to each one of them: “Go forth, Christian soul, out of this world:” hasten to be gone, for now there is no time for thee. How will they then exclaim, lamenting, Alas' I have squandered away my whole life; during so many years I might have become a saint; but how far am I from being such; and shall I become such, now that there is no more time for me ! But to what purpose will such lamentations be, when the dying man is on the verge of that moment on which will depend eternity?
Walk whilst you have light. (John 12:35) The time of death is the time of night, when nothing can any longer be seen, nor anything be accomplished. The night cometh, in which no man can work. (John 9:4) Hence the Holy Spirit admonishes us to walk in the way of the Lord, whilst we have the light and the day before us. Can we reflect that the time is near approaching in which the cause of our eternal salvation is to be decided, and still squander away time? Let us not delay, but immediately put our accounts in order, because when we least think of it, Jesus Christ will come to judge us. At what hour ye think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
Hasten, then, my Jesus, hasten to pardon me. And shall I delay ? shall I delay until I am cast into that eternal prison, where, with the rest of the condemned souls, I must forever lament, saying. The summer is past, and we are not saved? (Jeremiah 8:20) No, my Lord, I will no longer resist Thy loving invitations. Who knows but that this meditation which I am now reading may be the last I shall ever cast my eyes upon ! I am sorry for having offended Thee, O sovereign good! To Thee do I consecrate the remainder of my days, and beseech Thee to grant me holy perseverance. I desire never more to offend Thee, but forever to love Thee. O Mary, refuge of sinners! in thee do I place my confidence.
I give Thee thanks, O God! for giving me time to bewail my sins, and to make amends by my love for the offences I have committed against Thee.
Nothing is so precious as time; and yet how comes it that nothing is so little valued? Men will spend hours in jesting, or standing at a window or in the middle of a road, to see what passes; and if you ask them what they are doing, they will tell you they are passing away time. O time, now so much despised! thou wilt be of all things else the most valued by such persons when death shall have surprised them. What will they not then be willing to give for one hour of so much lost time! But time will remain no longer for them when it is said to each one of them: “Go forth, Christian soul, out of this world:” hasten to be gone, for now there is no time for thee. How will they then exclaim, lamenting, Alas' I have squandered away my whole life; during so many years I might have become a saint; but how far am I from being such; and shall I become such, now that there is no more time for me ! But to what purpose will such lamentations be, when the dying man is on the verge of that moment on which will depend eternity?
Walk whilst you have light. (John 12:35) The time of death is the time of night, when nothing can any longer be seen, nor anything be accomplished. The night cometh, in which no man can work. (John 9:4) Hence the Holy Spirit admonishes us to walk in the way of the Lord, whilst we have the light and the day before us. Can we reflect that the time is near approaching in which the cause of our eternal salvation is to be decided, and still squander away time? Let us not delay, but immediately put our accounts in order, because when we least think of it, Jesus Christ will come to judge us. At what hour ye think not, the Son of man will come. (Luke 12:40)
Hasten, then, my Jesus, hasten to pardon me. And shall I delay ? shall I delay until I am cast into that eternal prison, where, with the rest of the condemned souls, I must forever lament, saying. The summer is past, and we are not saved? (Jeremiah 8:20) No, my Lord, I will no longer resist Thy loving invitations. Who knows but that this meditation which I am now reading may be the last I shall ever cast my eyes upon ! I am sorry for having offended Thee, O sovereign good! To Thee do I consecrate the remainder of my days, and beseech Thee to grant me holy perseverance. I desire never more to offend Thee, but forever to love Thee. O Mary, refuge of sinners! in thee do I place my confidence.
The Lamb of God Sacrificed for our Sins
Behold the Lamb of God, (John 1:29) thus did the Baptist speak of our Blessed Redeemer, who offered his blood and even his life in sacrifice to obtain our pardon and our eternal salvation. Behold him in the hall of Pilate; as an innocent Lamb he permits himself to be shorn, not of wool, but of his sacred flesh, with thorns and scourges. He shall be dumb as a lamb before His shearer, and He shall not open His mouth. (Isaiah 53:7) He opens not his mouth, nor does he complain, because he desires to suffer himself the punishments due to our sins.
May the angels and all creatures bless Thee, O of the world! for the great mercy and love which Thou hast shown towards us. We had committed sins, and Thou didst make satisfaction for them!
Behold him, bound like a malefactor and surrounded by executioners, conducted to Calvary, there to become the victim of the great sacrifice, by which the work of our redemption is to be accomplished. I was as a meek lamb that is carried to be a victim. (Jeremiah 11:19)
Whither, O Jesus! do the people conduct Thee, loaded with such a cross, after having so cruelly tormented Thee? Thou answerest me. They conduct Me to death, and I go willingly, because I am going to save thee, and to prove how great my love is towards thee. And how, O my Saviour! have I proved my love towards Thee? Thou indeed knowest: by injuries and grievous offences, and by my frequent contempt of Thy grace and love. But Thy death is my hope. I am sorry, O Thou love of my soul! for having offended Thee; I am sorry, and will love Thee with my whole heart.
St. Francis of Assisi, seeing a lamb led to the slaughter, could not refrain from tears, saying, "As this lamb is led to the slaughter, so was my innocent Lord conducted for me to the death of the cross."
Since, then, O Jesus ! Thou dost not refuse to go to sacrifice Thy life for the love of me, shall I refuse to give my whole self for the love of Thee? This Thou requirest of me: Thou shall love the Lord thy God. (Matthew 22:37) This, and this only, do I desire — to love Thee, and to love Thee with my whole heart. Thou hast loved without any reserve, and so will I love Thee. I am sorry for having offended Thee, O Lamb of God! and I give my whole self to Thee. Accept of me, 0 Jesus ! and make me faithful to Thy grace. O Mary, Mother of my Redeemer, make me by thy prayers entirely his !
May the angels and all creatures bless Thee, O of the world! for the great mercy and love which Thou hast shown towards us. We had committed sins, and Thou didst make satisfaction for them!
Behold him, bound like a malefactor and surrounded by executioners, conducted to Calvary, there to become the victim of the great sacrifice, by which the work of our redemption is to be accomplished. I was as a meek lamb that is carried to be a victim. (Jeremiah 11:19)
Whither, O Jesus! do the people conduct Thee, loaded with such a cross, after having so cruelly tormented Thee? Thou answerest me. They conduct Me to death, and I go willingly, because I am going to save thee, and to prove how great my love is towards thee. And how, O my Saviour! have I proved my love towards Thee? Thou indeed knowest: by injuries and grievous offences, and by my frequent contempt of Thy grace and love. But Thy death is my hope. I am sorry, O Thou love of my soul! for having offended Thee; I am sorry, and will love Thee with my whole heart.
St. Francis of Assisi, seeing a lamb led to the slaughter, could not refrain from tears, saying, "As this lamb is led to the slaughter, so was my innocent Lord conducted for me to the death of the cross."
Since, then, O Jesus ! Thou dost not refuse to go to sacrifice Thy life for the love of me, shall I refuse to give my whole self for the love of Thee? This Thou requirest of me: Thou shall love the Lord thy God. (Matthew 22:37) This, and this only, do I desire — to love Thee, and to love Thee with my whole heart. Thou hast loved without any reserve, and so will I love Thee. I am sorry for having offended Thee, O Lamb of God! and I give my whole self to Thee. Accept of me, 0 Jesus ! and make me faithful to Thy grace. O Mary, Mother of my Redeemer, make me by thy prayers entirely his !
Friday
The Reformation of our Lives before Death
Every one desires to die the death of the saints, but it is scarcely possible for the Christian to make a holy end who has led a disorderly life until the time of his death; to die united with God, after having always lived at a distance from him. The saints, in order to secure a happy death, renounced all the riches, the delights, and all the hopes which this world held out to them, and embraced poor and mortified lives. They buried themselves alive in this world, to avoid, when dead, being buried forever in hell.
O God! for how many years past have I deserved to be buried in that place of torments, without hope of pardon, or of being able to love Thee ! But Thou hast waited in order to pardon me. Truly, then, am I sorry from the bottom of my heart for having offended Thee, my sovereign good; and have pity on me, and do not permit me to offend Thee any more.
God forewarns sinners that they will seek him in death and will not find him: You shall seek and shall not find Me. (John 7:34) They shall not find him because they will not then seek him through love, but only through the fear of hell; they will seek God without renouncing their affection for sin, and hence they shall not find him.
No, my God, I will not wait to seek Thee in death, but will seek and desire Thee from this moment. I am sorry for having hitherto given Thee so much displea-sure by seeking to gratify my own inclinations. I am sorry for it, I confess that I have done evil. But Thou wiliest not that the heart that seeks Thee should despair, but rejoice: Let the heart of them rejoice that seek the Lord. (Psalm 104:3) Yes, O Lord ! I seek Thee, and I love Thee more than myself.
How miserable is the Christian who before his death has not spent a good part of his life in bewailing his sins! It is not to be denied that such a man may be converted at his death and obtain salvation; but the mind obscured, the heart hardened, the bad habits formed, the passions predominant, render it morally impossible for him to die happily. An extraordinary grace will be necessary for him; but does God reserve such a grace to bestow it upon one who has continued ungrateful to him even until the moment of death? O God, to what straits are sinners reduced to escape eternal destruction!
No, my God, I will not wait until death to repent of my sins and to love Thee. I am sorry now for having offended Thee; now do I love Thee with my whole heart. Suffer me not any more to turn my back upon Thee; rather let me die. O holy Mother, Mary, obtain for me perseverance in virtue.
O God! for how many years past have I deserved to be buried in that place of torments, without hope of pardon, or of being able to love Thee ! But Thou hast waited in order to pardon me. Truly, then, am I sorry from the bottom of my heart for having offended Thee, my sovereign good; and have pity on me, and do not permit me to offend Thee any more.
God forewarns sinners that they will seek him in death and will not find him: You shall seek and shall not find Me. (John 7:34) They shall not find him because they will not then seek him through love, but only through the fear of hell; they will seek God without renouncing their affection for sin, and hence they shall not find him.
No, my God, I will not wait to seek Thee in death, but will seek and desire Thee from this moment. I am sorry for having hitherto given Thee so much displea-sure by seeking to gratify my own inclinations. I am sorry for it, I confess that I have done evil. But Thou wiliest not that the heart that seeks Thee should despair, but rejoice: Let the heart of them rejoice that seek the Lord. (Psalm 104:3) Yes, O Lord ! I seek Thee, and I love Thee more than myself.
How miserable is the Christian who before his death has not spent a good part of his life in bewailing his sins! It is not to be denied that such a man may be converted at his death and obtain salvation; but the mind obscured, the heart hardened, the bad habits formed, the passions predominant, render it morally impossible for him to die happily. An extraordinary grace will be necessary for him; but does God reserve such a grace to bestow it upon one who has continued ungrateful to him even until the moment of death? O God, to what straits are sinners reduced to escape eternal destruction!
No, my God, I will not wait until death to repent of my sins and to love Thee. I am sorry now for having offended Thee; now do I love Thee with my whole heart. Suffer me not any more to turn my back upon Thee; rather let me die. O holy Mother, Mary, obtain for me perseverance in virtue.
Death, the Passage to Eternity
It is of faith that my soul is immortal, and that one day, when I least think of it, I must leave this world. I ought therefore to make a provision for myself, which will not fail with this life, but will be eternal even as I am eternal. Great things were done here, in their life-time, by an Alexander or a Caesar; but for how many ages past have their glories ceased! and where are they now?
O my God, that I had always loved Thee! What now remains for me, after so many years spent in sin, but trouble and remorse of conscience? But since Thou dost allow me time to repair the evil which I have done, behold me. Lord, ready to perform whatever Thou requirest of me, whatever Thou pleasest. I will spend the remainder of my days in bewailing my ungrateful conduct towards Thee, and in loving Thee with all my power, my God and my all, my only good.
What will it avail me to have been happy in this world (if indeed true happiness can be attained without God) if hereafter I should be miserable for all eternity? But what folly it is, to know that I must die, and that an eternity either of happiness or misery awaits me after death, and that upon dying ill or well depends my being miserable or happy forever, and yet, not to adopt every means in my power to secure a good death!
Holy Spirit, enlighten and strengthen me to live always in Thy grace, until the hour of my departure. O infinite goodness! I am sensible of the evil which I have done by offending Thee, and I detest it: I know that Thou alone art worthy of being loved, and I love Thee above all things.
In a word, all the good things of this life must end at our burial and be left, while we are mouldering in our graves. The shadow of death will cover and obscure all the grandeur and splendor of this world. He only, then, can be called happy who serves God in this world, and by loving and serving him acquires eternal happiness.
O Jesus! I am truly sorry for having hitherto made so little account of Thy love. Now I love Thee above all things, and I desire nothing else but to love Thee. Henceforth Thou only shalt be the sole object of my love, Thou only shalt be my all; and this is the only inheritance I ask of Thee; to love Thee always, both in this life and in the next. For the merits of Thy bitter Passion, give me perseverance in all virtues. Mary, mother of God, thou art my hope.
O my God, that I had always loved Thee! What now remains for me, after so many years spent in sin, but trouble and remorse of conscience? But since Thou dost allow me time to repair the evil which I have done, behold me. Lord, ready to perform whatever Thou requirest of me, whatever Thou pleasest. I will spend the remainder of my days in bewailing my ungrateful conduct towards Thee, and in loving Thee with all my power, my God and my all, my only good.
What will it avail me to have been happy in this world (if indeed true happiness can be attained without God) if hereafter I should be miserable for all eternity? But what folly it is, to know that I must die, and that an eternity either of happiness or misery awaits me after death, and that upon dying ill or well depends my being miserable or happy forever, and yet, not to adopt every means in my power to secure a good death!
Holy Spirit, enlighten and strengthen me to live always in Thy grace, until the hour of my departure. O infinite goodness! I am sensible of the evil which I have done by offending Thee, and I detest it: I know that Thou alone art worthy of being loved, and I love Thee above all things.
In a word, all the good things of this life must end at our burial and be left, while we are mouldering in our graves. The shadow of death will cover and obscure all the grandeur and splendor of this world. He only, then, can be called happy who serves God in this world, and by loving and serving him acquires eternal happiness.
O Jesus! I am truly sorry for having hitherto made so little account of Thy love. Now I love Thee above all things, and I desire nothing else but to love Thee. Henceforth Thou only shalt be the sole object of my love, Thou only shalt be my all; and this is the only inheritance I ask of Thee; to love Thee always, both in this life and in the next. For the merits of Thy bitter Passion, give me perseverance in all virtues. Mary, mother of God, thou art my hope.
Tuesday
The Patience of God with Sinners
The more we have experienced the patient mercies of God, the more we ought to be afraid of continuing to abuse them, lest the time of God's vengeance overtake as. Revenge is Mine, and I will repay in due time. (Deuteronomy 32:35) God will put an end to his forbearance towards those who wul not cease to abuse it.
I give Thee thanks, O Lord! for having patiently borne with me, though I have so often betrayed Thee. Make me sensible of the evil that I have done by abusing Thy patience for so long a time; make me sorry for all the offences I have committed against Thee. No, I will never more abuse Thy tender mercy.
“Commit this sin; you can afterwards confess it.” Such is the artifice with which the devil has drawn many souls into hell. Many Christians, now in hell, have been lost by this delusion. The Lord waiteth, that He may have mercy on you. (Isaiah 30:18) God waits for the sinner, that the sinner may be converted, and obtain mercy; but when God sees that the time which he allows the sinner for doing penance is employed only in increasing the number of his offences, then he waits no longer, but punishes him as he deserves.
Pardon me, O God! for I desire never more to offend Thee. And why should I delay? that Thou mayest condemn me to hell ? I fear indeed that now Thou canst no longer have patience with me. I have indeed offended Thee too grievously. I am sorry for it. I repent of it. I hope for forgiveness through the merits of that blood which Thou hast shed for me.
The mercies of the Lord that we are not consumed: because His commiserations have not failed. (Lamentations 3:22) Thus should he exclaim who finds, to his confusion, that he has frequently offended God. He should be most grateful to God for not having suffered him to die in his sins. and be most careful not to offend him again; otherwise the Lord will reproach him, saying: What more could I have done for My vineyard that I have not done? (Isaiah 5:4) God will say to him: Ungrateful soul! if thou hadst committed the same offences against man, who is viler than the earth, verily he would not have borne with thee. And how great mercies have I exercised towards thee! How many times have I called thee, and enlightened thee, and pardoned thee ? The time of punishment is at hand; the time of forgiveness is past.—Thus has God spoken to many who are now suffering in hell; where one of their greatest torments is the remembrance of the mercies which they formerly received from God.
Jesus, my Redeemer and my Judge! I also have deserved to hear the same from Thy mouth; but I hear Thee now again calling me to pardon: Be converted to the Lord thy God. O accursed sin, which has made me lose my God, how much do I abhor and detest thee! I turn my whole self towards Thee, my Lord and my God! My sovereign good, I love Thee; and because I love Thee I repent with my whole soul for having, during the time that is past, so much despised Thee. My God! I desire never more to offend Thee: give me Thy love, grant me perseverance. Mary, my refuge, succor and help me.
I give Thee thanks, O Lord! for having patiently borne with me, though I have so often betrayed Thee. Make me sensible of the evil that I have done by abusing Thy patience for so long a time; make me sorry for all the offences I have committed against Thee. No, I will never more abuse Thy tender mercy.
“Commit this sin; you can afterwards confess it.” Such is the artifice with which the devil has drawn many souls into hell. Many Christians, now in hell, have been lost by this delusion. The Lord waiteth, that He may have mercy on you. (Isaiah 30:18) God waits for the sinner, that the sinner may be converted, and obtain mercy; but when God sees that the time which he allows the sinner for doing penance is employed only in increasing the number of his offences, then he waits no longer, but punishes him as he deserves.
Pardon me, O God! for I desire never more to offend Thee. And why should I delay? that Thou mayest condemn me to hell ? I fear indeed that now Thou canst no longer have patience with me. I have indeed offended Thee too grievously. I am sorry for it. I repent of it. I hope for forgiveness through the merits of that blood which Thou hast shed for me.
The mercies of the Lord that we are not consumed: because His commiserations have not failed. (Lamentations 3:22) Thus should he exclaim who finds, to his confusion, that he has frequently offended God. He should be most grateful to God for not having suffered him to die in his sins. and be most careful not to offend him again; otherwise the Lord will reproach him, saying: What more could I have done for My vineyard that I have not done? (Isaiah 5:4) God will say to him: Ungrateful soul! if thou hadst committed the same offences against man, who is viler than the earth, verily he would not have borne with thee. And how great mercies have I exercised towards thee! How many times have I called thee, and enlightened thee, and pardoned thee ? The time of punishment is at hand; the time of forgiveness is past.—Thus has God spoken to many who are now suffering in hell; where one of their greatest torments is the remembrance of the mercies which they formerly received from God.
Jesus, my Redeemer and my Judge! I also have deserved to hear the same from Thy mouth; but I hear Thee now again calling me to pardon: Be converted to the Lord thy God. O accursed sin, which has made me lose my God, how much do I abhor and detest thee! I turn my whole self towards Thee, my Lord and my God! My sovereign good, I love Thee; and because I love Thee I repent with my whole soul for having, during the time that is past, so much despised Thee. My God! I desire never more to offend Thee: give me Thy love, grant me perseverance. Mary, my refuge, succor and help me.
Monday
The Merciful Chastisements of God
God, being infinite goodness, desires only our good and to communicate to us his own happiness. When he chastises us, it is because we have obliged him to do so by our sins. Hence the prophet Isaias says that on such occasions he doth a work foreign to his desires (Isaiah 28:21) Hence it is said that it is the property of God to have mercy and to spare, to dispense his favors and to make all happy.
O God! it is this Thy infinite goodness which sinners offend and despise, when they provoke Thee to chastise them. Wretch that I am, how often have I offended Thy infinite goodness!
Let us therefore understand that when God threatens us it is not because he desires to punish us, but because he wishes to deliver us from punishment; he threatens because he would have compassion on us. O God, . . . Thou hast been angry, and hast had mercy on us. (Psalm 59:3) But how is this? He is angry with us, and treats us with mercy? Yes! He shows himself angry towards us, in order that we may amend our lives, and that thus he may be able to pardon and save us; hence if in this life he chastises us for our sins, he does so in his mercy, for by so doing he frees us from eternal woe. How unfortunate, then, is the sinner who escapes punishment in this life!
Since then, O God! I have so much offended Thee, chastise me in this life, that Thou mayest reinstate me in Thy grace and deliver me from hell, where I should be forever separated from Thee. Enlighten and strengthen me to overcome every obstacle to Thy favor.
He who makes no account of the divine threats ought much to fear lest the chastisement threatened in the Proverbs should suddenly overtake him. The man that with a stiff neck despiseth him that reproveth him, shall suddenly be destroyed; and health shall not follow him. (Proverbs 29:1) A sudden death shall overtake him that despises God's reprehensions, and he shall have no time to avoid eternal destruction.
This, O Jesus! has happened to many, and I indeed have deserved that the like should happen to me; but, O my Redeemer! Thou hast shown that mercy towards me which Thou hast not shown to many others who have offended Thee less frequently than I have done, and who are now suffering in hell without the least hope of ever again being able to regain Thy favor. I know, O Lord! that Thou desirest my salvation, and I also desire it, that I may please Thee. I renounce all, and turn myself to Thee, who art my God and my only good. I believe in Thee, I hope in Thee, I love Thee, and Thee alone. O infinite goodness! I am exceedingly displeased with myself for having hitherto done evil against Thee; and I wish that I had suffered every evil rather than offended Thee. Suffer me not any more to depart from Thee, rather let me die than offer Thee so great an injury. In Thee, my crucified Jesus, do I place all my hopes. O Mary, mother of Jesus! recommend me to thy Son.
O God! it is this Thy infinite goodness which sinners offend and despise, when they provoke Thee to chastise them. Wretch that I am, how often have I offended Thy infinite goodness!
Let us therefore understand that when God threatens us it is not because he desires to punish us, but because he wishes to deliver us from punishment; he threatens because he would have compassion on us. O God, . . . Thou hast been angry, and hast had mercy on us. (Psalm 59:3) But how is this? He is angry with us, and treats us with mercy? Yes! He shows himself angry towards us, in order that we may amend our lives, and that thus he may be able to pardon and save us; hence if in this life he chastises us for our sins, he does so in his mercy, for by so doing he frees us from eternal woe. How unfortunate, then, is the sinner who escapes punishment in this life!
Since then, O God! I have so much offended Thee, chastise me in this life, that Thou mayest reinstate me in Thy grace and deliver me from hell, where I should be forever separated from Thee. Enlighten and strengthen me to overcome every obstacle to Thy favor.
He who makes no account of the divine threats ought much to fear lest the chastisement threatened in the Proverbs should suddenly overtake him. The man that with a stiff neck despiseth him that reproveth him, shall suddenly be destroyed; and health shall not follow him. (Proverbs 29:1) A sudden death shall overtake him that despises God's reprehensions, and he shall have no time to avoid eternal destruction.
This, O Jesus! has happened to many, and I indeed have deserved that the like should happen to me; but, O my Redeemer! Thou hast shown that mercy towards me which Thou hast not shown to many others who have offended Thee less frequently than I have done, and who are now suffering in hell without the least hope of ever again being able to regain Thy favor. I know, O Lord! that Thou desirest my salvation, and I also desire it, that I may please Thee. I renounce all, and turn myself to Thee, who art my God and my only good. I believe in Thee, I hope in Thee, I love Thee, and Thee alone. O infinite goodness! I am exceedingly displeased with myself for having hitherto done evil against Thee; and I wish that I had suffered every evil rather than offended Thee. Suffer me not any more to depart from Thee, rather let me die than offer Thee so great an injury. In Thee, my crucified Jesus, do I place all my hopes. O Mary, mother of Jesus! recommend me to thy Son.
Sunday
The Sinner's Disobedience to God
Pharaoh, when Moses announced to him the orders of God for the liberation of the Hebrews, insolently answered, “Who is the Lord, that I should hear His word? . . . I know not the Lord.” (Exodus 5:2) It is thus that the sinner replies to his own conscience when it intimates to him the divine precepts, which forbid him to do that which is evil: “I know not God; I know that he is my Lord, but I will not obey him.”
Thus have I too often addressed Thee, 0 God! when I have committed sin. If Thou hadst not died for me, O my Redeemer! I should not dare to crave Thy pardon; but Thou hast offered me Thy it; I am sorry for having despised Thee, my sovereign good. I will rather die than offend Thee any more.
Thou hast broken my yoke; thou saidst, I will not serve. (Jeremiah 2:20) The sinner, when tempted to commit sin, hears indeed the voice of God, saying to him, “My son, do not revenge thyself, do not gratify thyself with that infamous pleasure; relinquish the possession of that which is not thine.” But by yielding to sin, he replies, “Lord, I will not serve thee. Thou desirest that I should not commit this sin, but I will commit it.”
My Lord and my God, how frequently have I, not by my words, but my deeds and my will, thus daringly replied to Thee! Alas! Cast me not away from Thy face. (Psalm 50:13) I am now sensible of the wrong I have done Thee in parting with Thy graces for the gratification of my own wretched desires. O that I had died rather than ever offended Thee !
God is the Lord of all things, because he has created all. All things are in Thy power, because Thou hast made heaven and earth, and all things that are under the cope of heaven. (Esther 13:9) All creatures obey God; the heavens, the earth, the sea, the elements, the brute creation; while man, although he has been gifted and loved by God above all other creatures, obeys him not, and is heedless of the loss of his grace!
I give Thee thanks, O God, for having waited for me. What would have become of me, had I died in one of those nights in which I went to rest under Thy displeasure? But as Thou hast patiently waited for me, it is a sign that Thou art desirous of pardoning me. Pardon me then, O Jesus! I am sorry above every evil for having ever lost the respect which is due to Thee. But
then I did not love Thee; now I do love Thee more than myself, and I am ready to die a thousand times rather than again forfeit Thy grace and friendship. Thou hast said that Thou lovest those who love Thee. (Proverbs 8:17) I love Thee; do Thou love me in return, and give me grace to live and die in Thy love; that so I may love Thee forever. Mary, my refuge, through thee do I hope to remain faithful to God until the hour of my death.
Thus have I too often addressed Thee, 0 God! when I have committed sin. If Thou hadst not died for me, O my Redeemer! I should not dare to crave Thy pardon; but Thou hast offered me Thy it; I am sorry for having despised Thee, my sovereign good. I will rather die than offend Thee any more.
Thou hast broken my yoke; thou saidst, I will not serve. (Jeremiah 2:20) The sinner, when tempted to commit sin, hears indeed the voice of God, saying to him, “My son, do not revenge thyself, do not gratify thyself with that infamous pleasure; relinquish the possession of that which is not thine.” But by yielding to sin, he replies, “Lord, I will not serve thee. Thou desirest that I should not commit this sin, but I will commit it.”
My Lord and my God, how frequently have I, not by my words, but my deeds and my will, thus daringly replied to Thee! Alas! Cast me not away from Thy face. (Psalm 50:13) I am now sensible of the wrong I have done Thee in parting with Thy graces for the gratification of my own wretched desires. O that I had died rather than ever offended Thee !
God is the Lord of all things, because he has created all. All things are in Thy power, because Thou hast made heaven and earth, and all things that are under the cope of heaven. (Esther 13:9) All creatures obey God; the heavens, the earth, the sea, the elements, the brute creation; while man, although he has been gifted and loved by God above all other creatures, obeys him not, and is heedless of the loss of his grace!
I give Thee thanks, O God, for having waited for me. What would have become of me, had I died in one of those nights in which I went to rest under Thy displeasure? But as Thou hast patiently waited for me, it is a sign that Thou art desirous of pardoning me. Pardon me then, O Jesus! I am sorry above every evil for having ever lost the respect which is due to Thee. But
then I did not love Thee; now I do love Thee more than myself, and I am ready to die a thousand times rather than again forfeit Thy grace and friendship. Thou hast said that Thou lovest those who love Thee. (Proverbs 8:17) I love Thee; do Thou love me in return, and give me grace to live and die in Thy love; that so I may love Thee forever. Mary, my refuge, through thee do I hope to remain faithful to God until the hour of my death.
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